You might find yourself questioning yourself, your judgment, feelings, and your reality.
Your confidence will decline, and you will feel inferior, not with your husband but with everyone.
8 belittling language to watch out for
“I feel like my husband puts me down, but I’m not sure.”
Belittling or putting you down is already a form of abuse. It can take different forms, and here are the eight belittling languages to watch out for:
“So? Is that it? Even a six-year-old could do that.”
It’s when your spouse gives remarks that aim to trivialize your achievements, goals, feelings, and even your experiences. Instead of being proud of you, he’ll make you feel that your achievements are worthless.
My husband puts me down. Do we still have a chance to make it work?
“My husband puts me down, and I’m getting tired of it, but I don’t know how to deal with it.”
Before we provide the different ways to handle your husband putting you down, let’s first understand that there are two types of cases here.
Spouse got the chance to do it or have resentment towards his wife. He may not know that he’s already making a habit of putting down his wife and is not aware of the dangers and effects of it.
We can still work on this. It will be tough, but if you ask if there’s a chance to make it work, there is.
Your husband knows what he’s doing, and he’s enjoying it. He knows he’s destroying you and your relationship, and he doesn’t care. He’s abusive, and there is no way you can still change this person.
If you are experiencing abuse, please do seek help.
11 tips if you’re married with someone who puts you down
“He puts me down, and I want to do something about it. Where do I start?”
Here are 11 tips on how you can deal with your husband if he’s always putting you down.
1. Listen to the comments
You may try to justify the words or even ignore the hurtful words. Don’t do that. Listen to the words and know when your husband is already belittling you. You must know what type of belittling language he’s using.
These belittling words can’t put you down if you know they are not true.
2. Secure your self-esteem
Your husband may be putting you down because he thinks he can. He knows your self-esteem isn’t that solid and that he could get away with leaving hurtful comments.
Work on your self-esteem and show them that you’re unbreakable.
There will be times where it’s best to ignore your husband and his efforts to put you down.
4. Keep calm
“Why does my partner put me down? It makes me so angry!”
That’s correct. These words can also trigger anger, resentment, and other negative emotions, but only if you let them. Don’t let your husband’s words put you down and drag you into his world of negativity.
Keep calm and be in control.
It’s hard to control anger, but here are four ways on how to turn off your anxiety and other harmful emotions by Emma McAdam, a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.
5. Make yourself better
He constantly reminds you of your shortcomings, but will you let him?
Be better. Set your goals, strive to get them. Realize that you don’t need anyone’s approval to be successful or happy.
Remember, the person who is trying to put you down is the one who’s trying to prove something.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.