Relationship Test: What Help Does Your Relationship Need Most Right Now?

Jennifer Jacobsen Schulz
Verified Marriage & Family Therapist Reviewed by
Jennifer Jacobsen Schulz, LCSW
Jennifer Jacobsen Schulz
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified Marriage & Family Therapist Review Board Member

Jenni Jacobsen is a licensed social worker with a master's degree in social work from The Ohio State University, and she is in the process of completing her dissertation... Read More

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Marriage.com Editorial Team
Marriage.com Editorial Team
Marriage.com Editorial Team
Expertise: Relationship & Marriage Advice

The Marriage.com Editorial Team is a group of experienced relationship writers, experts, and mental health professionals. We provide practical and research-backed advice on relationships. Our content is thoroughly reviewed by experts to ensure that we offer high-quality and reliable relationship advice.

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20 Questions | Updated: Nov 18, 2025

1. How do you express appreciation for each other?


Regularly — we notice and thank each other often
I wish we showed more emotion when we do
Sometimes I question their sincerity
Gratitude can sound defensive or sarcastic
We don’t really show it through touch anymore — affection has gotten pretty rare
We have different “love languages”
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About This Quiz
Relationship Test: What Help Does Your Relationship Need Most Right Now?
If your relationship feels off balance, if communication feels harder, connection weaker, or tension more frequent, this assessment can help you understand what’s happening beneath the surface. Grounded in relationship psychology and evidence-... see more
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2. What first name or nickname would you like us to use?

You may optionally provide this to personalise your insights.

3. How well do you understand each other’s needs right now?


Very well — we check in often
Fairly well, though I wish we went deeper emotionally
I’m not sure they really get mine
We misinterpret each other often
We’re missing each other physically — it feels like we’re not in sync there
We’re in sync on logistics more than emotions

4. How do you feel after resolving an issue?


Closer and more connected
Relieved but still emotionally distant
Unsure if things are truly resolved
Like it might come up again
Even after making up, the physical closeness doesn’t come back easily
More practical peace than emotional closure.

5. When your partner disappoints you…


I talk about it openly to understand
I pull back emotionally
It takes time to rebuild trust
It turns into a blame cycle
I pull away physically — it’s hard to feel close when things feel off
I question whether we share the same values

6. When you think about your future together…


We talk about dreams and feel aligned
We’re close now but haven’t discussed the future much
I hope it works out, but I’m not always sure
Future talk often leads to tension
It’s tough to picture the future when we already feel so distant physically
We see the future differently

7. When it comes to affection…


It feels emotionally safe and mutual
It’s caring but sometimes feels disconnected
I hold back, unsure if it’s genuine
Affection drops after disagreements
Affection is pretty minimal now — we’re not as physically close as we used to be
Our needs don’t always align

8. How playful or spontaneous is your relationship?


We laugh and find small ways to stay lighthearted
Things feel more serious than before
It’s hard to relax fully
We’re often too stressed to play
We’ve lost a lot of our spark — intimacy and playfulness just don’t happen much anymore
We rarely prioritise shared joy

9. How does stress affect your emotional connection?


We face it together and talk things through
Closeness fades under stress
I sometimes doubt emotional availability
We get reactive or withdrawn
Stress shuts down our physical closeness fast — we hardly reach for each other
We handle stress in opposite ways

10. How do you handle personal goals and dreams?


We support each other’s ambitions
They care, but I wish they’d show more emotional interest
I’m not always sure they want me to succeed
We argue about whose goals matter more
We’re so physically distant lately that even talking about dreams together feels hard
Our ambitions sometimes pull us apart

11. How balanced does the effort in the relationship feel?


We both try to keep communication strong
I give emotionally but wish it were reciprocated more
I try hard but question their consistency
We sometimes blame each other for not doing enough
I try to be affectionate, but it doesn’t always feel like it’s met the same way
We value effort differently

12. When you and your partner talk about something important…


We listen with care — even hard talks feel safe and productive
We try to talk, but lately emotional closeness feels harder to reach
I want to be open, but part of me still guards my heart
Our discussions sometimes spiral or end unresolved
It’s hard to feel close because our physical intimacy hasn’t felt strong lately
We often see things differently about goals or priorities

13. How would you describe your sense of “teamwork” as a couple?


Strong — we communicate and support each other’s goals
Kind of good but not always emotionally in sync
I sometimes question if we’re equally committed
We clash about effort or attention
We get things done, but our physical closeness feels far away lately
We’re not always on the same page about long-term plans

14. How do you both reconnect after a disagreement?


We talk and find closure quickly
We stay emotionally distant for a while
I struggle to fully trust their apologies
Old issues resurface easily
Reconnecting is tough — getting close physically again doesn’t come easily
We move on without really aligning

15. How often do you feel understood by your partner?


Most of the time — we really try to understand each other
Not as often as I’d like
I hold back to avoid disappointment
Conversations often turn defensive
It’s hard to feel fully understood when our physical closeness has been low
We connect on logistics more than feelings

16. When you disagree about something important…


We respect each other’s views and find middle ground
We both pull away until it blows over
It’s hard to rebuild trust afterwards
It turns into a cycle of blame
Disagreements make it even harder for us to feel physically close or affectionate
It usually reflects deeper differences in goals

17. When you face stress as a couple…


We talk it through and support each other
We get distant until things calm down
I’m not always sure they’ll show up emotionally
Stress makes us short-tempered or reactive
Stress pulls us apart — we don’t reach for each other like we used to
We cope differently, and that can create friction

18. When you share something vulnerable with your partner…


My partner listens and helps me feel safe to open up
They care, but sometimes don’t know how to respond emotionally
I hesitate — I’m never quite sure how it will land
It can easily turn into misunderstanding or hurt feelings
It’s tough to open up because we’ve been feeling physically disconnected for a while
They focus more on logic or problem-solving than emotion

19. How does affection or physical intimacy feel lately?


It feels genuine and emotionally connected — we talk about what we both need
It’s caring, but sometimes feels emotionally out of sync
I want to be close, but part of me still holds back
Affection tends to fade when there’s tension
It feels pretty distant — affection and intimacy don’t happen as often anymore
We have different comfort levels or desires, and that can create distance.

20. When conflict arises, how do you both handle it?


We pause, listen, and usually work toward understanding
We shut down for a while before reconnecting
It’s hard to fully trust what’s said when emotions flare
We get defensive, then circle back when things calm down
After arguments, it takes a long time for us to feel physically close again
We usually clash because of different priorities or values

21. How would you describe the emotional atmosphere between you right now?


Warm, open, and supportive — even during stress, we feel like a team
Loving but distant — the spark is dimmer even though we care
Uneasy — I sometimes question if I can fully rely on them
Tense — emotions run high and small things can trigger bigger issues
We care about each other, but our physical closeness just isn’t what it used to be
Stable but focused on practical things more than emotional connection.
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