If you want to know how to improve physical intimacy in marriage, there are several key things you need to keep in mind. Physical intimacy can be just as important in developing and maintaining a relationship as verbal affection; not everyone views physical intimacy or certain types of physical intimacy in the same way; and physical intimacy takes time and patience to develop, even in a marriage.
If you are having some difficulties with physical intimacy in your marriage, consider the following essential tips to improving it.
1. Take things slow
Some people are just not comfortable with physical intimacy, particularly grand gestures such as kissing or hugging in public. There are many reasons why people might be uncomfortable or awkward when it comes to physical closeness, so it’s important to remember that it’s okay—and sometimes necessary—to take things slower than you might like.
2. Be romantic
When most people think about physical intimacy, they think about gestures which are more or less romantic—hugging, kissing, cuddling and so on. But physical intimacy is about more than kissing—physical intimacy is about feeling comfortable and enjoying being close to your partner.
You can help the situation by engaging in activities that promote physical intimacy in other ways, such as (but not limited to): going on carnival rides, riding a motorcycle, going on a walk, seeing movies in theaters, sitting next to each other at restaurants instead of across the table, etc. These small acts of physical intimacy may not seem romantic at the time, but they can go a long way towards building more comfort and affection between you and your partner.
3. Cherish small physical signs
Physical intimacy doesn’t have to be a big, swooping hug when you see each other in public; nor does it have to be constant, up-close-and-personal kisses. Small signs of physical intimacy or affection are just as important and, too many people are not as uncomfortable or potentially awkward. These smaller signs include activities such as holding hands while in private or public, playing footsie under the table, and playful behavior such as tickling or wrestling.
4. Never force intimacy
Sometimes you may feel like if you just make your partner hug or cuddle, they will eventually warm up to the idea—but this is a big mistake that not only makes it more likely that your partner will not want to be physically intimate, it invalidates your partner’s feelings towards intimacy as well.
It’s very important to recognize boundaries and limits in a relationship—you can work on improving physical intimacy, but you can’t force someone to be intimate with you.
Remember: have patience, take things slowly, and don’t forget that physical intimacy doesn’t have to mean cuddling on the couch every night. It can be as simple as lovingly holding each other’s hands when you’re out shopping or sitting super close together at a diner booth.