Do you feel like things are going too fast for you to handle? Are there moments when you stop and think about taking a relationship slow? Are you trying to figure out how to slow down a relationship?
Don’t worry; it’s completely normal!
New relationships are indeed exciting, and even the dullest of activities become fun. However, hurried unions can lead to disappointment because you can become obsessed with the romantic phase of the process.
It’s always better to take your time instead of dealing with unexpected heartbreak.
Here are a few useful tips on how to slow down in a new relationship:
1. Assess your relationship
Before you start distancing yourself from your partner you must understand why you want the relationship to slow down, maybe the relationship isn’t the issue and if it is you must identify which parts of the new relationship are moving too quickly.
Identify what is the reason which makes you want to slow down your new relationship.
You might have commitment issues.
Your partner is hinting towards a future commitment.
Maybe you are not comfortable with the physical side of the relationship.
Perhaps your partner is too emotionally attached.
2. Giving space
Wondering how to take a relationship slow?
If both of you are meeting every other day, maybe it’s time to reduce the dates. Shift your dates from thrice a week to thrice a month. It may sound hard, but the point of this is to make you realize what your priorities are.
Also, you’ll start valuing your partner more if you see them occasionally.
It will also make you think about the fact that if the person you’re dating is the right match for you or not. As difficult as it may sound, try to focus more on your work or important tasks.
3. Group hangouts
Hanging out in a group is a very smart way to decrease the pace of your relationship and get to know your partner more.
You spend time with them, but they are not the only ones you hang out with. It will lessen your date’s serious mood, and you may learn more about their personalities in a group of people.
Plus, you’ll get to meet a newer set of people resulting in more enjoyment.
4. Social media hurdles
If you really want to work on slowing down a relationship then try calling or texting less. In the beginning, it is bound to be tough. However, do remember it is a test of self-control and commitment.
It doesn’t mean you start ignoring them but just keep it balanced.
Even in the case of Instagram DMS, Snapchat or Facebook messages, be more careful. You can start by decreasing the number of phone or video calls. With time, you’ll feel relaxed and less anxious.
5. Devote time to your personal life
A lot of people especially women tend to give their emotional energy to their partner. They start avoiding close friends or family only to spend time with their significant other.
Now, this is a way of life that you should surely avoid. Don’t be dependent on your partner because you are an individual with an identity of your own.
If you make the mistake of getting blinded by emotions and feelings then there is a chance that you might get severely hurt in the future.
You can indulge in hobbies like baking, reading, exercising or even volunteering because they are not only good for the mind but also for the soul.
6. Delay dating milestones
There are certain milestones in a relationship where it transforms from a new relationship to a committed relationship.
Having sleepovers, getting a pet, meeting each other’s parents, and attending work parties are examples of occasions that can significantly accelerate a relationship.
You need to identify such instances and either try and delay them until you are certain you want to move ahead or manage your partner’s expectations by talking to them before being a part of such an occasion or milestone.
7. Focus more at work or hobbies
Not being in a fast-paced relationship allows you to focus more on work or other areas of interest.
This sets precedence in your relationship that you are more focused on your self-growth and are not yet ready to get too involved in a new relationship. Also, it helps you enhance other aspects of your life.
Also watch: How to get your brain to focus.
8. Avoid sleepovers
If your sleepovers are becoming too frequent, it won’t be long before your lives start getting more entangled.
Sleepovers might not seem like much, but when you enter someone’s private space, you might become more emotionally attached, and if you are not ready for such an experience, it can become a burden.
9. Be honest
Honesty is surely the best policy. You need to express your feelings and be open about what you think. Tell your partner that you don’t want to end things, but you like to move at your own pace.
A qualitative study conducted semi-structured one-on-one in-depth interviews with 33 African American high school girls in the mid-Atlantic region. Participants’ specified and vividly described honest one of the healthy relationship characteristics
If they’re serious about the relationship, they’ll respect your decision. Just make sure you’re gentle and considerate.
As mature adults, we must act our age, talk it out, and prevent misunderstandings. You never know, maybe your partner might also be feeling the same way.
Logically, the concept of love at first sight just doesn’t exist. A new relationship needs to be given more time and space to take its course naturally.
You need to know each other before making a serious decision. Hopefully, these tips on how to slow things down in a relationship provided you with some guidance and input. Now you know what to do.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.