How Sexual Aversion Disorder Affects Relationships & Ways to Deal
Sex is an integral part of our lives. We grow up and discover ourselves, our sexuality, and many other experiences that will influence us. Each of us has our way of discovering our sexuality, and typically, people don’t encounter any issues about it.
But what if you discover signs of sexual aversion disorder? What if you notice signs of psychological discomfort when you’re trying to become sexually intimate? How can this affect you and your relationship? Let’s understand what aversion to sex is and how to deal with it.
What is sexual aversion disorder?
When it comes to disorders about sexuality and sex, people have difficulty opening up. It’s because they are afraid of being judged and ridiculed. Sometimes, people know they are experiencing signs and have already felt that something is different, but they are too afraid to seek help.
One of these conditions is called sexual aversion disorder or SAD. If we talk about sexual aversion, the definition revolves around a person who exhibits extreme fear towards any form of sexual contact.
It’s the recurrent sexual avoidance of any form of sexual stimulation, contact, or even sexual intimacy with their partner. It’s essential to know that sexual aversion disorder (SAD) can affect both men and women.
In many ways, the people who have reported experiencing sexual aversion disorder have similar symptoms with an anxiety disorder rather than a sexual.
2 types of sexual aversion disorder
After talking about sexual aversion disorder, we also need to be aware of the different types of sexual aversion disorder. As of now, there are two types of sexual aversion disorder, and they are:
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Acquired sexual aversion disorder
Acquired sexual aversion disorder is a condition where an individual exhibits signs of aversion, specifically within a particularly intimate relationship. This can result from various factors, such as unresolved conflicts, negative experiences, or changes in the relationship dynamics.
In such cases, seeking sexual aversion therapy or counseling can be beneficial for both partners to address and potentially overcome this issue.
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Lifelong sexual aversion disorder
A lifelong sexual aversion disorder may stem from past trauma, overly strict sexual background, and even sexual identity problems. Individuals with this condition may have faced challenges in forming healthy, fulfilling sexual relationships throughout their lives.
Overcoming lifelong sexual aversion may require specialized therapeutic interventions, including trauma-focused therapy and exploration of one’s sexual identity, to promote a more positive and satisfying sexual experience.
What can cause sexual aversion disorder?
In discussing the etiology of sexual aversion, there is little information about it and even its prevalence. It is, however, a subcategory of hypoactive sexual desire disorder or HSDD. Studies showed that sexual aversion disorder is higher in women than in men.
In women, PTSD or post-traumatic stress disorder from traumatic experiences can cause sexual aversion disorder. It may include trauma from molestation, rape, incest, or any form of sexual abuse that they have experienced.
A woman who’s a victim of any form of sexual abuse may exhibit severe aversion to any intimacy. Even though the love and attraction are there, the trauma will remain for abused victims. A touch, a simple hug, or a kiss can trigger panic.
It’s one of the most heartbreaking side effects of abuse. Some victims will have a hard time moving on from the trauma. Even if they get married, SAD can still manifest. Because of the said trauma, any form of sexual intimacy that reminds them of their past can cause aversion.
Anxiety often causes sexual aversion disorder in men about their performance or size. Some men who have experienced sexual trauma or issues about their size and performance can severely affect their confidence. This may lead them to avoid any sexual contact.
Soon, the anxiety can grow, and before they know it, any chance of sexual intercourse will trigger a panic attack. Of course, the effects of panic or anxiety attacks will make arousal difficult, making the situation worse.
Sexual aversion tackles not only intercourse alone, but the aversion to sexual elements like semen can also define it and acts that may lead to sex, such as cuddling and kissing.
What are the symptoms of sexual aversion disorder?
When it comes to sexual aversion disorder symptoms, there is only one characteristic to watch out for – the aversion to any form of genital or sexual contact with someone.
Depending on the sexual aversion disorder causes, and how the person has dealt with the issue, the severity of the aversion may vary.
- Some people may avoid any form of contact, even holding hands, in fear that this act may lead to sex.
- Some people who have sexual aversion disorder can already manifest anxiety just by the thought of being intimate.
- At the sight of semen or even vaginal secretions, others can cause disgust and aversion.
- There are other people with sexual aversion disorder who may feel revolted at the thought of being intimate. Even kissing can be unbearable for them.
- Those who have sexual aversion disorder because of performance issues can avoid sexual contact because they’re afraid of not satisfying their partners.
- Panic attacks are a common reaction for people who have dealt with sexual abuse in the past and can lead to vomiting and fainting when faced with situations that remind them of their past trauma.
People dealing with sexual aversion disorder can suffer from different discomforts. It’s an unimaginable battle for each person with sexual aversion disorder. Because of a lack of information and support, they have to deal with the fear and the physical and psychological effects of sexual aversion alone.
Depending on the level of sexual aversion disorder, a person may experience some of the following:
- Shaking
- Palpitations
- Nausea
- Vomiting
- Extreme fear
- Dizziness
- Breathing difficulties,
- Fainting
What are the effects of sexual aversion disorder in relationships?
Sexual aversion in marriage or relationships can be a tough challenge to deal with. Some people who have this disorder would choose to use diversion techniques rather than open up with their partners. Sadly, their partner would notice the pattern of avoidance.
Without proper communication, this can cause resentment, causing more damage to the person with the disorder. Aside from that, intimacy in marriage or partnership is essential. Without these foundations, a relationship may not last. This can cause failed relationships.
A person who constantly battles sexual aversion disorder and ends up with failed relationships may eventually have poor social well-being and confidence.
How to deal with sexual aversion disorder
A person experiencing sexual aversion disorder would often resort to diversion techniques to avoid being intimate with their partners. They might not be comfortable explaining their feelings to their partners or even have doubts about getting treated.
Dealing with sexual aversion disorder can be challenging, but it is possible with the right approach and support. Here are some steps to consider if you or someone you know is dealing with this condition and want to learn how to overcome sexual aversion:
1. Seek professional help
The first and most crucial step is to consult a qualified mental health professional or therapist with expertise in sexual disorders. They can help diagnose the condition, identify its underlying causes, and create a treatment plan tailored to your specific needs.
2. Understand the causes
Sexual aversion Disorder can have various underlying causes, such as past traumatic experiences, relationship issues, anxiety, depression, or medical conditions. Understanding the root causes can help guide treatment.
3. Sensate focus exercises
Sensate focus exercises involve gradual, non-sexual touching and intimacy between partners, helping to re-establish comfort and trust in physical contact. This can be particularly beneficial for couples dealing with sexual aversion.
4. Communication and support
Open and honest communication with your partner is quite crucial. Discuss your feelings, concerns, and progress in therapy. Your partner’s understanding, support, and patience can make a significant difference in the recovery process.
5. Self-care
Practicing self-care, managing stress, and maintaining overall well-being are essential. This can include regular exercise, a balanced diet, and managing any other health issues that may be affecting your sexual aversion.
4 effective treatments for sexual aversion disorder
Are you thinking whether there is any form of sexual aversion disorder treatment available? The answer is yes. Today, many treatments are available to help deal with and treat sexual aversion disorders. However, the first thing you should know is that assessment is necessary.
There will be different sexual aversion disorder tests and interviews to help determine the cause, effect, and treatment necessary for the patient. Some treatments available are:
1. Medications
Some patients may require taking medications similar to those given to people who have panic or anxiety attacks. The professional may also use hormonal replacements as an effective way to help treat sexual aversion disorder, depending on the cause.
However, you can only opt for these medications with approval and prescription. Remember, do not self-medicate because not all people with sexual aversion disorder can be treated by taking medications. Those who have suffered from sexual abuse and trauma will need a different approach. Self-medicating may lead to substance abuse.
2. Psychological treatment
Psychological treatment mainly involves the help of a licensed sex therapist. Most commonly used to treat acquired sexual aversion disorder, the therapist focuses on unresolved issues, resentments, communication problems, etc.
The treatment usually addresses the couple together and resolves any issues that might affect one of them, causing sexual aversion. For example, if a person has concerns about their performance, the therapist can create a plan for the couple to overcome the triggers causing the aversion.
It’s crucial to only ask for help from a board-certified sex therapist.
It’s crucial to only ask for help from a board-certified sex therapist.
Watch Alicia Decker, CEO of Mended Light, as she explains the difficulties of achieving healthy sexuality after sexual trauma and how one can recover from it:
3. Systematic desensitization
Systematic desensitization treatment works by slowly introducing the patient to a list of subtle sexual activities. Each level will expose the patient to increased triggers that may cause anxiety under the supervision of the licensed therapist.
Relaxation techniques and ways will accompany each level to deal with the stimuli. This program aims to familiarize the patient with the stimuli that cause panic attacks or fear until they overcome the triggers before moving to the next level.
There will be many levels to work on, but the progress will depend on the person suffering from SAD. This treatment is all about facing your fear, dealing with triggers, and learning how to control your anxiety.
4. Integrative treatment
In some cases where the sexual aversion disorder stems from sexual abuse and trauma or if the effects are too severe, this treatment is preferable. Integrative treatment is a combination of different programs from different professionals.
It may be a mix of treatments from psychologists, physical therapists, physicians, and sex therapists. They would work together to address different issues concerning the patient’s sexual aversion disorder.
FAQs
Sexual aversion disorder can be a challenging and sensitive topic for individuals and couples. Here are concise answers to common questions about this condition.
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Is it possible to get better from sexual aversion disorder?
Yes, it’s possible to improve sexual aversion disorder with therapy and support. Treatment strategies often involve psychotherapy, addressing root causes, and communication exercises, offering hope for a better quality of life.
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How to be supportive if your partner is sex averse
To support a partner with sexual aversion, practice empathy, maintain open communication, consider therapy together, and always respect your partner’s boundaries and feelings, encouraging a nurturing and understanding relationship.
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Is sexual aversion curable?
While not guaranteed, many individuals experience significant relief and improvement in sexual aversion through therapy and support. Although a complete cure isn’t always attainable, seeking professional help can lead to substantial progress.
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How common is sexual aversion?
Sexual aversion’s prevalence varies, with some experiencing it temporarily and others dealing with it as a chronic issue. It’s common, and seeking professional guidance can help individuals cope with this condition effectively.
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What is the difference between hypoactive sexual desire disorder and sexual aversion disorder?
A general lack of sexual desire characterizes hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD), while sexual aversion disorder (SAD) involves an intense aversion to sexual activities, often due to fear or disgust.
HSDD focuses on desire levels, while SAD revolves around a negative emotional response to sex. Recognizing the distinction helps tailor treatments and support to individuals’ specific needs.
In summary
Dealing with sexual aversion disorder is a challenging experience. There can be many reasons why a person develops sexual aversion disorder or sexual aversion disorder. Suppose this disorder causes their partners to be offended or hurt. Can you imagine what this can do to the person experiencing it?
The feeling of anxiety or even panic attack at the slightest trigger of intimacy or sexual contact can cause many physical symptoms, from trembling and nausea to dizziness and palpitations. Aside from the physical effects of the disorder, relationships can also suffer. However, there are ways to get better.
Treatments are available, even for people who are experiencing severe SAD effects. The first step is to open up and accept help to get better. It’s hard to talk and open up, but it’s the first step to improving.
With the help of professionals, proper treatment can be available. They will also ensure they will guide you every step of the way. Remember that you don’t have to keep everything to yourself.
You deserve freedom from fear, panic, and anxiety. You owe it to yourself to seek treatment to get better. You deserve to live a normal and happy life.
The road to getting better from sexual aversion disorder may not be that easy, but it will be worth it. Soon, you’ll start enjoying intimacy and a healthy sex life with your spouse or partner.
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