Popular opinion states that men and women differ so much that they might come from different planets.
While we wouldn’t agree with such an extreme stance (there is more difference between individuals than between men and women as groups), it is true that men, in general, tend to act differently in relationships than women.
Whether it is biology, evolution, or psychosocial factors, the culture and its influence on a developing mind in childhood, men are expected to be strong, tough, composed, and rational.
But how are the romantic relationships of modern men? What is a myth, and what is the fact? Let’s understand men and romance.
Do men actually like romance?
This is probably the most perplexing question that women keep stressing over. When it comes to romance, men have a different approach.
What is romance to a man? It’s not only about candlelight dinners, romantic movies, long drives, etc. They don’t lack in the romance department, have an analytical view, and mostly focus on logic.
For example, a woman might watch a movie and find it romantic emotionally (scenes with flowers, romantic monologues). In contrast, a man would look at their actions and wonder why the character did what he did.
Do guys like romance? Are guys romantic? Certainly, however, they seem to have a different kind of mindset regarding romance. Men like the security of logic rather than working solely based on emotions.
Men seek the same things as women
Apart from being, in fact, more romantic than women, men tend to seek pretty much the same things from their love partners as women do.
Men, same as women, search for a kind and intelligent person with an exciting personality. When you think about what romance is to a man, you also associate this question solely with physical attributes.
While it is true that men do rate physical appearance as more important than women, studies have shown that, in practice, such gender differences disappear.
Men and women choose their future partners based on physical attractiveness equally. Men may be more vocal (or honest) about how important looks are. So, men do feel attracted by the physical characteristics of a woman, but equally, so do women.
Men, like women, search for a person with a set of psychological characteristics that they would find appealing when they want to date her and develop a romantic relationship with her.
Men are more romantic than women
We learned that men are more romantic and less superficial than usually considered. So, when they enter a relationship, how do they behave? It is generally believed that men tend to be more withdrawn and inaccessible, especially when a conflict arises.
This is somewhat true, and the cause of such a state of affairs is partly in the cultural influence that dictates how men ought to behave and partly in the dynamics of the relationship itself.
More precisely, how the partners communicateand interact will determine how the men behave, and the same goes for women. In other words, both men and women might find themselves in the position of a demander or the one who withdraws when facing a demand.
Yet, the modern Western culture is arranged in such a manner that men usually find themselves in the position of the stronger and more reserved partner who is often flooded with demands for emotional closeness.
When one partner demands that certain needs are met or that affection is expressed in a certain way and does it more and more intensively, the other partner will inevitably begin to withdraw.
10 things men think are absolutely romantic
What romance is to a man is not that hard to decode. It’s debatable if men are more romantic than women, but here are some things that men find extremely romantic.
Honesty is probably the only closest answer to what romance is to a man. Believe it or not, honesty is something that men prioritize over anything.
Movies have claimed otherwise, where a lost girl finds a perfect guy who takes care of her inevitably, but the truth is that when it comes to romance, men feel more comfortable with confident women.
4. Dedicated time
Regarding romance, men want women to invest their time in them. Be it a date night, a video call, or a getaway, ‘it is important for men that their partners make time for them.
Being the sole bearer of their partner’s attention is romantic to men. They always desire a woman who dedicates time to them; when she does, they feel loved.
5. Display of affection
What is romance to a man? A possible perfect answer to that is receiving affection. When their partner holds their hand or is close to them, they feel romance is in the air. For them expressing how much they are loved is romantic.
Whether they admit it or not, most men like mushy stuff.
Love letters have always been a perfect way to express love, and since love letters have become rare these days, they have gained a reputation as one of the most romantic things for men and women. So men do find love letters romantic.
Men and women both need to feel secure and good about themselves. Men love when they are heard and feel validated. Owing to their approach toward romance, validation makes them feel happy and wanted.
Who doesn’t feel romantic when they are desired by someone they love? Men, too, feel romantic when they are seen as the object of desire. As soon as they see that look in a woman’s eye, most;y their heart skips a beat, and if that is not romantic, we don’t know what is.
Men in relationships don’t differ from women; surely not as much as any person differs from the other. What type of romance do guys like?
They seek someone who will respect, love, and cherish them. A man in a relationship needs someone who will inspire and support him and be there by his side through the good and bad times.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action.