There are no perfect matches in life, and the idea of a soul mate is a myth. Relationships are hard and need to be worked in order to be successful.
Every couple has to go through trials by fire. The best relationship advice that can be given to any couple is that they have to navigate through several differences that show up in a partnership.
It could happen over simple things like food, discussions on politics, and on the style of raising children.
These differences add spice to your life and make it interesting. People who love each other truly have to open up their vistas of seeing things the way their partners do and understand them.
Read some of the best relationship advice for couples, to make love last longer:
1. Adapt and absorb
Every partner has something to offer to his or her mate. You will have to learn to appreciate what others have to offer to you instead of doing your best to change them to fit your ideas and templates of how love and life should be lead.
Sooner or later, you will have to start accepting the fact that your partner is fallible. It will be anticipating a disaster if you start a relationship with someone thinking that they will be everything that you had dreamt about.
During the growing stages in a relationship, there will be an intense passion and urgency; in the beginning, followed by a stage of snatched sex during the parenthood years.
It will simmer down to a slower form of intimacy during the middle years. It is not possible to expect the same fervor in the act of intercourse thirty years from the point when the relationship began.
4. Appreciate the company of each other
When a couple has managed to face the ups and downs of rearing their children up and working towards a comfortable life for all the family members, the rewards in such a relationship are immense.
Life has many glorious moments to offer to you as a couple. The smartest love relationship advice for all the couples in the world is to appreciate what life has to offer to them in each other’s company.
Each day is a miracle, and couples need to realize that and value the blessing of each passing day by celebrating it with togetherness.
5. Have realistic expectations
At the beginning of a relationship, things are as rosy as it gets. Both partners try to project the best versions of themselves to the other.
But after the honeymoon phases is over and rose-tinted glasses are off, the reality sets in.
You get to see your partner for what they really are, and that, most likely, would be a disappointment if you compare with what they had been at the beginning of the relationship.
It is important to understand that everybody has flaws. They might not surface in the period of courtship, but they are there.
Having realistic expectations and preparing yourself to deal with your partner’s latent flaws and can prevent you from the post-honeymoon period disappointment.
It will also set up a positive and durable foundation for your relationship that will help your relationship to sustain longer.
After years of marriage, being together for too long can feel a tad bit suffocating. Indulging in separate hobbies can breathe fresh life into your relationship.
Not only does indulging in hobbies generate oxytocin, which keeps you feeling positive, but the time you spend apart from your partner also makes the prospect of going back home to them a little more appealing.
So it is advisable, from the beginning of the relationship itself, to keep indulging in separate hobbies. It keeps your relationship fresher for longer.
Numerous experts, therapists, coaches, and gurus have emphasized the importance of communication countless times.
But, with time, couples tend to neglect what is essentially the foundation of their relationship, communication.
Years of togetherness makes you feel that you know your partner inside out.
But, people change, and keeping the chord of communication strong lets you keep a tab on your partner, what’s going on in their life and how they’ve evolved with time.
8. Don’t badmouth your partner
Complaining about your partner to others might seem like some harmless venting exercise. But this can dig a hole so deep in your relationship that cannot be repaired with any amount of effort.
Revealing your dissatisfaction with your partner’s traits, habits to family or/and friends, or using condescending tones to converse with them in public, is something most people have done some time in their marriage.
The only way to avoid this situation is to sit down and discuss the marital hiccups with your partner. That way, the accumulated complaints won’t surface in public arrangements.
9. Don’t relegate your relationship
After becoming parents, most couples devote the maximum amount of their time in parenthood related obligations.
It’s true that children deserve extra care and a good portion of your time daily, but neglecting your partner and relationship can have adverse consequences.
If not much, try and devote at least some of your day’s time to your relationship.
Not only will it help to make love last longer between you, seeing you and your partner getting along well will have a positive influence on your child as well.
10. Rise above the petty issues
Does your husband forget to take the trash out often? Does your wife fail to resist the most futile and gimmicky sales trick? These things may sound small but can lead to dramatic fights between couples.
If you have been married for long, you would agree that these things are annoying and must have caused some rift between you and your partner, some time or the other.
Try and let these issues go; try to be more accepting. This is the most underrated love and relationship advice.
Small issues can dig big holes even in a long and steady relationship. It is important to be more accepting and forgive and forgo trivial relationship issues.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Mary Fisher is a writer experienced with helping couples understand marriage, love
and relationships. She completed her studies in 2011 and is currently involved in
writing articles on intimacy, relationships and family.