“They might not be your first
They might not be the one
They might not have broken your heart
They might not have been the one to leave you
They might not have been your last
They might not have been your soulmate
But, you loved them, and therefore, they mattered.”
Usually, relationships are given worth and value if and only if they are ‘THE ONE’ in your life. This phenomenon is incorrect. No matter what relationship status you shared, the point is that the person mattered because you cared about them. And moving away from someone you cared about, someone you thought as the world to you is now not the same, that realization hurts.
If you are fresh out of a relationship and are thinking while wallowing in grief that how long does it take to get over an ex, then know that you need first of all to realize and come to terms with the fact that your relationship is over and done with.
No matter you saw it coming from miles ahead, or it was just a bucket of ice cold water dumped on your head, it happened. You are not together anymore.
Now, you may find yourself googling, ‘how to get over an ex?’ First of all, it is all going to be okay, not now, not in a week or probably a month or even a year; but eventually. Knowing fully that it hurts to get over an ex – how to get over an ex easily? Remember! There is no shortcut to it and no way that you can find an answer to ‘how to get over an ex fast?’ on the World Wide Web.
Following are a handful of things you should and shouldn’t do after you have been unfortunate enough to go through a breakup.
How to get over an ex-girlfriend you still love?
1. Add a handful of sad music to your playlist
As corny as it sounds, listening to sad music can literally be extremely therapeutic.
Now you may ask, ‘how will it help me getting over my ex?’ The thing is that we, as human beings, have a bucket load of emotions going through our body, but very few of us can actually express them. Singers and songwriters are amongst those few.
When we listen to those lyrics, it is as if they are speaking to us. They are giving words to every unspoken pain and emotion, and we feel elated. We feel as if there are others who have been through what we are going through, and we are not alone in this abyss.
After all, Shakespeare very famously wrote –
‘If music be the food of love, play on.’
2. Give yourself time to mourn the relationship
No matter how you both grew apart, no matter how messy and unsophisticated the breakup was. No matter how you two came to that point where you could not stay together and no matter how much you despise that person right now, the truth is that you loved that person at one point in time.
Just like one needs to mourn a loved one after they pass away, a breakup is like a passing away of a future, a future that you thought you would have.
Mourning is actually the next step when it comes to how to get over an ex. Lock yourself in your house, eat buckets of ice-cream, cry yourself to sleep, stay in bed all week long, watch your old pictures and videos, be angry. Do all of this and more, if you need to.
Do not care about how long to get over an ex. Just vent out your anger, frustration, pain and be ready for the next step.
Stalking your crush or watching all the other couples being lovey-dovey is not going to help answer your question, ‘how to get over an ex?’
Take a well-deserved break from social media, and rest. Instagram and Facebook can be a haven for all the millennials when it comes to pass the time or just for pure entertainment; however, it can be a living hell if you are fresh out of a relationship and have not quite come into terms with it yet.
4. Cleanse your house
This is another important step when it comes to how to get over an ex.
Remember! Nothing good can come from hoarding your ex’s clothes, gifts, pictures, or any other memorabilia. You may needed them to mourn your loss, but now that portion of the process is done with, collect everything (be it yours but it reminds you of your ex) and donate them to goodwill.
Burning or throwing them away is not healthy.
You have to overcome your grief by working on it, not by destroying things that you once loved and cherished. Just think of it this way; it brought you joy once; now, it will bring joy to someone else.
5. Challenge yourself with something new
If you had been in a loving relationship for quite a while, you are comfortable with the way you look, you start to slack off, and you are basically not appreciating yourself anymore.
In such cases, a breakup is a wakeup call.
When you are done with step 2 and 3, start working on yourself. Change a couple of things in your wardrobe, get a haircut, start going out, and enjoy the nightlife. Do things that you were apprehensive about doing while you were with your ex.
Go on a vacation, a change of scenery can be extremely therapeutic, and you never know what mysteries the world has in store for you.
Just ask Katy Collins, who quit her job, sold her car and house, and went backpacking after being dumped a couple of months before her wedding by her boyfriend of nine years.
During her travels, she contacted a journalist who published her story; and after a little this and that they ended up getting married and now have a daughter together.
If she hadn’t taken that particular leap of faith and would have spent years wallowing in grief and self-loathe, she would never have found her reason for a ‘happily ever after’ life.
These are a handful of things that may answer your question, ‘how to get over an ex-girlfriend?’