25 Experts Tips to Get Over a Guy

Have you been through a breakup recently? Had enough of mooning over some guy who doesn’t feel the same way about you?

We hear you! If you are wondering how to get over a guy, you have come to the right place.

Whether you are in the aftermath of a breakup or you just want to know how to forget a guy who doesn’t care about you and loves you back, here is some top-level advice to help you heal.

How do you get over a guy you loved?

We’ve all been there. When love goes, it hurts. It hurts your soul, your body, your mind, your heart, and your ego.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could speed through the recovery process and get back to your happy self instead of constantly contemplating how long it will take to get over a guy you loved?

Unfortunately, there is no shortcut to getting over a guy, but we have tried and true methods for easing your pathway from hurting to healing.

How long will it take to get over a guy?

If only there were a reliable timeframe for getting over a guy! The truth is, getting over a guy takes time. There are no proven steps to get over a guy.

However, there are so many things you can do so you avoid dwelling on the situation. There are ways to move on from a guy and start feeling better about yourself.

While you may think that you will never get over this guy right now, rest assured: one day, you will indeed stop caring, and you will find yourself with an open heart, ready to move on to the next life and love chapter.

25 ways to get over a guy

Would you like to know how to get over a guy as soon as possible?

There is no single way out of that pain, but you can try these ways to get over a guy you like or had a relationship with:

1. Integrate the fact that the relationship is no longer viable 

If you have been through a breakup, recognize that your story is now over, and there is no point wasting your time over nothing.

Love is a two-way street; if one of you has pulled out of the relationship, there is no relationship.

The same tip applies if you wonder how to get over a guy who doesn’t like you back. It would help if you accepted the truth: there is no relationship there.

According to Dionne Eleanor Reid, an experienced transformational coach:

At some point, when a door closes, we must stop staring at it. The key to our next chapters is often already in our hands.

2. Give yourself space and time to heal

We know it doesn’t feel great, but you must first remain here and absorb the feelings to heal. Let them in.

Be gentle as you acknowledge their presence.

 “I hurt, and it is normal; I hurt. I have lost someone I loved and cared about.” 

Remind yourself how beautifully human you are to be feeling all of these emotions.

3. Reach out to your friends

Your good friends are part of your “getting over the guy” toolkit. Allow them to sit with you as you grieve.

Accept their invitations to come over for an evening of bad TV shows and wine.

Let them organize activities that will help you get over this guy. Your friends will carry you through this time, just as you would for them.

Related Reading: 15 Signs Your Friends With Benefits Is Falling For You

4. Build structure into your days

The structure will be helpful in your recovery path. You don’t want to have anything to wake up to, or you will stay in bed, crying over the loss of him. So have a plan for your days, especially the weekends.

Get up, do some exercise, shower, and put on makeup. Set up lunches or dinners (or both!) with friends. Check in with your parents. Keep your days busy by structuring them carefully.

5. Replace negative thinking with positive thinking

To stop caring about a guy, it is helpful to trust that this breakup happened for a reason. 

Believe that the universe has something better in store for you.

Let go of every negative feeling, practice forgiveness and move on.

Watch this video on forgiveness to know more:

6. Please make a list of everything he did that annoyed you

It is helpful to jot down all the things you can think of that did not bring you joy in the relationship.

Dionne Eleanor Reid highlights that:

Every red flag you ignored was a lesson waiting for you to address.

Was he a control freak? Did he have an irritating laugh? Did he drink too much? 

Please write it down and refer to it when you miss him too much. It will help you get over him.

7. Be good to yourself

Part of how to get over a guy involves you being your own best friend. You may no longer be dating him, but you can date yourself.

What does this mean? It means doing nice things that make you feel good.

Dionne Eleanor Reid adds that:

The most important & exciting love story you’ll ever have is the one you write with yourself.

From buying a lovely scented candle to getting a fabulous haircut, carve out some time and room in your budget to spoil yourself. These are nice, self-indulgent ways to get over a guy.

8. Cut off all communication

It sounds harsh, but it indeed will help get over a guy.

You may have left things open, thinking you could check in with each other occasionally, but don’t do it. It will put you back in pain and sadness.

No texts on his birthday, no jokes forwarded by email. A clean break is needed to stop having feelings for someone.

9. Concrete ways to get over a guy

Deleting them from all your shared social media accounts will be key.

You may think that you can look at his Instagram and Facebook updates’ just in a friendly way,” but the reality is that every time you see him update, it will renew your pain. Especially if he is putting up photos of him and a new girlfriend.

Delete and block, seriously!

Don’t phone him. Don’t text him. Delete him from any WhatsApp groups you may be in together.

Related Reading: How to Get Over a Crush: 30 Helpful Tips for Moving On

10. Please stop talking about him

It is expected that you will talk about him in the post-breakup days. Your friends will want to know the story. But once that is done, stop talking about him.

Every time you tell the breakup story, you re-traumatize yourself. You embed this pain even deeper into your brain. So once everybody knows the score, stop mentioning him.

Refrain from trying to get information about him from common friends. Do not let his name pass your lips. It is over. Time to move on.

11. Get distance

Along with deleting him from your social media accounts, plan a trip out of town. See new places. Go hiking. Do some sightseeing, and observe things that have nothing to do with the man you loved.

Start renewing yourself by putting distance between you and him; it will be instrumental in how to get over a guy.

12. Get his photos off of your phone 

To avoid inadvertently seeing his face, which will make you sad, delete all photos of him and you two together.

Put them on a flash drive and put that away. You can look at these one day, but not now.

13. Box up anything that triggers painful memories 

To aid in getting over a guy, you will want to remove visual reminders of him and your time together.

Get a box and load it up with his cards, tickets to that concert you went to together, any jewelry he gave you, and his old college sweatshirt that you “borrowed.”

One day you can take these out and think fondly of him, but that day is far in the future. It would help if you got rid of those painful memories.

Related Reading: The Gift of Forgetting the Bad Memories

14. Clean your house

It sounds funny, doesn’t it? But cleaning can be cathartic.

It will get your mind off of the guy, and you will have a sparkling, shiny nest to come home to!

So grab a trash bag, pick up all those Kleenex, candy wrappers, and takeaway boxes, and get cleaning!

15. Analyze what led to the breakup

Take some time to look at the reason behind the breakup. Were you slipping into a dull routine together? Did you have issues that never seemed to be resolved? Did they leave for someone else?

Looking at these things helps you get over a guy because it forces you to admit that there were problems in the relationship; it was not perfect.

It also might bring to the forefront any part your behavior could have played in the breakup. Once identified, you can, if you choose, work on this to avoid repeating it.

16. Get active

We are talking about the movement here. Daily exercise.

You may have turned to chocolate and ice cream during the initial days to help you get over the guy, but now it is time to do good things for yourself!

Exercise will boost your feel-good hormones and get you into shape!

Commit to an exercise program that gets you out of your house, and let it be your anchor as you recover.

17. Get your food clean

Another anchor point as you move through this challenging period: clean and healthy food.

You don’t want to end up with extra poundage once you are ready to hit the dating scene, so use this time to get into the shape you feel your best at.

You don’t need to wake up in the morning regretting what you ate last night.

18. Get out there

Even if you aren’t ready to officially date, get out there in the world.

Relationship & empowerment mentor Dionne Eleanor mentions:

You are not what someone failed to see in you.

Go to concerts, take dance classes, and hit clubs. Anything that gives you a connection with others and makes you feel alive. 

19. Learn something new

As part of your healing, start a new passion that has no connection to the guy you are getting over. Enroll in a foreign language class (and plan to take a trip to that country so you can use your new skills!).

Join a running club. Start writing your autobiography. Anything that engages your mind and gives you something other than that guy to think about.

20. Date

There is no calendar for when you should start dating again. Ignore those that tell you not to date “too soon.” Start dating when you feel like you want to. That can be two months post-breakup or six months.

You don’t need to marry the next guy you date, but why not have a little fun, boost your self-esteem, and show off that incredible body and soul of yours to a new man?

21. Reinvent yourself

What would you do if you did not feel fear? We hold ourselves back quite a bit because we are fearful.

Drop the fear and try what you’ve always wanted to do: a skydiving lesson, a solo trip snorkeling in the tropics, or changing your job.

Being released from the relationship allows you to reinvent yourself. Be bold.

22. Carve out some “me” time 

It may be challenging to be alone now, but spend some time with yourself.

Set up a pleasant environment with candles, the music you like, and a great book. Learning how to be happy alone is vital to understanding how to re-couple healthily.

23. Make exciting plans

Give yourself something to look forward to a yoga retreat, a weekend drive up the coast, or a trip to see your old college roommate.

Related Reading: Are You Planning For A Marriage Or Just A Wedding?

24. Remember your worth

Reminding yourself that you are worthy, intelligent, beautiful, and attractive helps you get over a guy.

Our feelings of self-worth are often low after a breakup or when rejected by someone. Tell yourself that this rejection has everything to do with him and nothing to do with you. You are a great human being!

25. Don’t stress where you are in the breakup timeline

Healing is never linear. You may have days you feel like you are over him; other days, you find yourself crying and missing your old life. All is normal. Remember: this too shall pass.

Time heals all wounds, even the love wounds. As you move through these difficult life moments, remind yourself that with each passing day, you are healing.

One day, you may even fall in love again with someone perfectly suitable for you. You will look back at this relationship and wonder what you were even thinking? You may even thank this guy for breaking up with you because it led you to The Right One.

Want to check in on where you are with your recovery? Take the Are You Over Him Quiz now!

FAQs

Here are some most discussed questions about when it is time to move on from a guy and how to not be sad over a boy.

• How do you stop thinking about a guy who is not interested?

Accepting the truth might make your heart ache, but as soon as you accept it, you will feel the urge to keep yourself busy with other things. When you are sure, just tell yourself, “I need to get over him, ” and follow the steps mentioned above in the article. 

Keep yourself distracted from his thoughts and focus on other important things in life. It may take some time and resistance, but eventually, you will move on when it is time to move on from a guy. 

Don’t be harsh on yourself; give yourself the time you need to heal. 

• How do you make a man crave you again?

There is no way to know if a man who has lost interest in a woman would crave her again, but here are some things you should try that might make him crave you. 

1. Be present for him at important moments so that he feels you are an important part of his life. 
2. Shower the right amount of affection and make him feel at home. 
3. Appreciate his efforts, and when men don’t feel appreciated for their efforts, they tend to take it on their ego and drift apart. 
4. Accept him for the man he is, not the man you want him to be. If it happens naturally, it’s okay but don’t force it on him. 
5. Respect him and demand respect in return. A connection without respect eventually loses the spark and dies overtime.
6. Be mature, and be responsible for your emotions, actions, and life. Emotionally mature women are incredibly attractive to men. 

If you are already in a relationship and think that the spark is missing and it can be rejuvenated, you can opt for couples therapy for better advice. 

Takeaway

Getting over someone may seem the most challenging thing ever, but it is achievable. For some people, it takes months. It takes longer than that for others, but time does heal everything.

Coach Dionne Eleanor points out:

Love yourself through the heartbreak as fiercely as you once loved them.

So, if you are worried about how to get over a guy, you fell head over heels for, don’t sweat. Things will turn out to be better.

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