It takes a split second to notice someone. From this short time, our minds can already process if we like this person based on our first impressions of them.
Is this person approachable, likable, attractive, and competent?
Another 20-30 seconds and you have completely formed an opinion of this person. Deep inside, you know if you still want to approach this person or stay away from them.
The first impression is very important because it stays in this person’s mind – for a long time. In fact, it sets the tone for what will happen next.
You’re on a blind date, and you’ve been waiting for her for more than an hour. You see her coming, and she’s all over the place, and then she even scolds the waiter. She then proceeds and rants about traffic and how bad her day was.
What is the first impression that you will have on your date? Will there be a chance of another date?
Even though your date would probably try to redeem herself after calming down, the first impression she has given you is already stuck in your mind.
Why are first impressions so important? It’s important because this will greatly influence the person’s decision and feelings.
Let’s explain further.
Why are first impressions important to us? Does this mean that we have to focus on this alone?
We’re not just talking about love here. We’re talking about the different relationships we will build during our lifetime.
How valuable is a first impression to have a successful relationship of any kind?
The answer is that it’s very important. First impressions will make a lasting image of you to another person. That’s why when you meet someone new, may it be your potential boss, friend, teacher, or partner, it’s important to remember that this is your chance to:
1. Show them that you can keep up with your schedule.
If you will be attending a meeting or an interview, you need to always be on time. Even if someone asked you out and you’re busy, that’s not a valid reason to be late. Showing up on time is very important.
Believe it or not, if you want to have a successful relationship at work or in life, you need to show them that you know how important time is.
2. Show that you’re presenting yourself appropriately
Let’s face it, physical appearance matters. Why are first impressions important when you want to land a job or get the attention of a potential boyfriend?
It’s because your appearance is the first thing that these people will notice.
If you want a successful interview or have a second date, you have to look your best. Of course, it doesn’t mean that you need to look like a lingerie model. You just be neat and presentable.
When looking for a partner or someone to spend the rest of your life with, of course, you want to get to know this person first. One of the first things that your potential partner will notice is how open and confident you are.
A successful relationship is a partnership between two mature people in love.
So, if a person sees that you are confident, independent, and mature, then this is what he’ll remember. This is his first impression of you that will be stuck in his mind.
This, along with the other things that he saw when he first met you will all add to the reasons why he can consider you as a future partner.
This actually works when you’re applying for a job too. No one will hire you if you don’t look confident.
4. You’re giving a glimpse of your personality
Why are first impressions important when we’re meeting someone?
No one wants to be in a relationship with someone rude, misogynistic, or anyone who has bad traits. When you meet someone new, you become observant, and you want to know how this person deals with the people around you.
Does this person yell at their driver? Does this person look down on their fellow applicants?
This sets an expectation of what you will be dealing with if you choose to be with this person. So, do first impressions matter? It does and it plays a major part in our lives.
5. You’re making a person fall in love with you or disappointed in you
If a person shows rude behaviors and is not on time on a date, that’s it. There’s no second date that is going to happen.
However, if you’re on time, you’re polite, and you have that positive and wonderful smile, chances are, your date is already falling in love with you.
Come to think of it, love, at first sight, is all about falling in love with first impressions.
First impressions – Are they even accurate?
Surprisingly, a person’s first impression is most accurate when it comes to the trustworthiness and competence of a person.
But there are, of course, situations where first impressions fail.
Differences with religious beliefs, nationality, and even customs are major factors that can affect one’s first impression.
It would be unfair to judge or create a first impression on someone who doesn’t speak your language, right?
Then, we should also be aware that people can fake their attitudes just to create a good impression.
An example of this is when you’re dating a narcissist who is a master of manipulation. Most victims of abuse won’t have an idea that they’re married to one until later in the relationship.
While these are some exemptions, the majority of first impressions that people create are close to the real deal.
If you are suspecting that your partner or someone you know is a narcissist, this video may help. Watch Dr. Grande as he discusses the pathological vulnerable narcissism case study.
How to leave a good lasting impression
The power of first impressions is important to all of us. We all have first impressions, and this is the start of creating something successful. May it be a relationship, marriage, or for your business, first impressions are important.
It’s the key to allowing yourself to trust this person and to open up.
First impressions are a great way to filter who stays in your life. Now that we’re conscious about it, how do we leave a lasting good impression?
Just remember, in order to leave a positive impression on someone you just met, you have to:
Keep it real
You don’t have to be perfect to be accepted. You just have to be real and show them who you are. Pretending to be someone you’re not isn’t just fooling other people. You’re also fooling yourself in the process.
No matter how tired you are, smile. When you meet someone new, giving them that warm smile can lighten the atmosphere. May this be for an interview or a date, break the ice with an awesome smile.
Always be presentable
Dress appropriately and comfortably. Believe it or not, if you’re not comfortable with what you are wearing, other people will notice.
Always be on time
Because being late is a total turn-off. That’s the reason why most dates where one is late, don’t really proceed to a second one.
Maybe you’ve met the people who will interview you. Instead of showing them your weakness, show them your strengths. If you’re on a date, instead of complaining how your day went, why not talk about positive things?
Leaving a first impression is not that hard, you just have to think, “If I would meet someone, what would I like?”
Would I like a person who’s late and arrogant? Or someone who’s on time and has a warm smile?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action.