So you have started a new relationship. Lucky you!
You have got a clean slate, a chance to do it right this time. You are full of hopes, passion and your brain is flooded with the pleasure hormones of dopamine and serotonin brought on by new love.
Your greatest desire is to turn this new relationship into a long-term one. What are some new relationship tips and advice that you can use to make this happen? Read on!
Dating tips for new relationships
As a new couple, you have a whole new world awaiting your discovery.
1. Take it slow.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and your relationship needn’t be, either. The best relationship advice for new couples is to take things slow.
Take your time unwrapping this gift. The surest way to kill a budding relationship is to try and force its growth in an unnatural fashion.
It is understandable that you are excited about the prospect of making this relationship work. But it is early on, so let things develop organically, following their own natural rhythm.
2. Keep your own friends and interests
If you devote all your waking hours to being with this new person, things will quickly become boring and the relationship will die.
Trust us: time spent apart will be like fanning a fire from a small spark to a full flame. You want to have oxygen between you.
So keep your girls’ night out and continue to spend time with friends and family.
You don’t need to integrate your new relationship into your original friends set immediately. You’ll know when it is the right time.
Relationship expert Wendy Atterberry calls this the 50-30-20 rule: “The 50-30-20 rule is the division of your leisure time: No more than 50 percent with your significant other, 30 percent with friends and family and 20 percent me time.”
Other relationship advice experts say don’t sleep together too soon.
While it is important to have sexual compatibility in a new relationship, it is equally important to build emotional intimacy prior to getting naked together. With a strong emotional bond formed, the sex will be all the better!
Searching for topics of conversation?
Usually this isn’t a problem in a new relationship. But if you find yourself becoming tongue-tied around your new love, here are some things to talk about in a new relationship.
1. Expectation setting
When you feel comfortable enough, have the conversation about what you expect from the relationship. Fidelity? Longterm goals, such as marriage and children? How do you anticipate dividing dating expenses?
Fun questions that will help you get to know each other better
- If you could get on a plane right now, where would you go?
- If you didn’t do what you are currently doing professionally, what would be your dream job?
- If you suddenly won the lottery, how would you spend the money?
- Would you ever take a job in a foreign country? Where?
- What books are on your nightstand right now?
- Favorite binge-watching series
- How would your friends describe you?
- What is one thing you could tell me about yourself that would surprise me?
And, if you are looking for fun things to do together as a couple as you begin this new relationship, here are some suggestions.
- Work out together
- Try an exotic restaurant together (Ethiopian, Moroccan, Balinese)
- Go to a theme park and do the thrill rides together
- Karaoke night
- Attend a standup comedy show
- Go to a pottery painting workshop and make your own mugs
- Participate in a political demonstration for a cause you both care about
- Send each other funny GIFS
How to make your new relationship work
You know you both have feelings for each other and have told each other so. You both want to see this relationship work.
Here are some tips to help nudge the magic along:
1. Choose wisely
Most people will agree that the best relationships are made up of people from similar socio-economic class, with similar educational backgrounds, who share similar values.
2. Be yourselves
You don’t need to “win” him over by pretending to be anything other than who you are.
The deepest relationships are formed when each person shows up true to themselves. No need to act as if you are a world-class athlete when the most active part of your weekend is getting up to search for the remote. Eventually, you’ll be found out.
3. Don’t forget your friends
No relationship can flourish in a vacuum.
Sure, you want to spend time with your new love interest, but take time to hang out with your BFFs. It will give the relationship the breathing space it needs, and help keep you balanced as well.
4. Don’t give up your hobbies and passions
These are part of what makes you an interesting person.
5. Don’t stress over it
If this new relationship is meant to be, it will happen. Don’t compare this new relationship with any that you’ve had before.
6. Be clear with boundary setting
If you aren’t ready for sex when he is, tell him so, and explain why. Communicate from a place of kindness and honesty and don’t push things too quickly.
What being in a new relationship entails
Starting a new relationship is a wonderful time in your life.
You have moved past old grudges, and this new relationship is giving you hope that love will be part of your life again. So, what to do in a new relationship? Remember to hold fast to your own identity and take time away from this new relationship to self-nurture.
The more you remain true to yourself and your self-care, the more you can bring to the new relationship. Your new partner will be all the more awestruck by it.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.