When most young people imagine what their future love life will look like, passionate love is at the top of their wish list, along with a deep emotional bond with their partner, true friendship, and a sense of feeling safe and secure with the one they marry.
But what is passionate love and what are the signs of a passionate relationship?
What does passionate love mean?
Social psychologist Elaine Hatfield, an expert on relationship science, describes passionate love as “a state of intense longing for union with another.”
The feeling is so strong that people often compare passionate love to being addicted to drugs.
Passionate love meaning refers to the intense and high feelings you develop for someone.
Love is like a drug, and indeed it is. Passionate love can make you feel like you are addicted to the person you love.
This type of love is exhilarating, and every inch of you feels alive. Knowing this, you can’t help but wonder, “What does it mean to be passionate about someone and is it healthy?”
Passionate love is very much present at the beginning of most love relationships. We’ve all experienced this state, where all we think about is our beloved, making it hard to concentrate on our work and other responsibilities.
What does passionate love feel like?
Romantic love and passionate love can be present in one relationship. Though, it would help if we knew how to differentiate the two.
If you feel romantic love, it’s a deep feeling of affection. It’s where you want to be in each other’s company and settle down.
Passionate love is the process of falling in love with someone. It’s the highest and most exciting point of the relationship. However, this can fade and focus more on sexual passion.
Passionate love is almost a trancelike experience.
When you are with your partner, you want to connect physically with them, and when you are separated from them, the ache for their presence is almost unbearable. Great art, music, poetry, and literature are born from this place.
Let’s define passionate love as we describe the emotions that we feel.
Passionate love is not:
Full of secrets and lies
Holding things back
Ignoring the other
Not responding to emails, phone calls, texts
Full of game-playing and trying to seem cooler than your partner
Not acknowledging your partner
Not listening to your partner
Not truly seeing your partner
Passionate love is all about:
Seeing, acknowledging and valuing your partner
Thinking about them non-stop from the moment you wake up in the morning to the moment you go to sleep at night
Making love and thinking about their pleasure first, and yours, second
Radiating happiness at the thought of seeing them soon
Sleepless nights and dreamlike days
Physical aspects of passionate love
To know how does passionate love feel, let’s move on to the physical aspect of passionate love.
In these heady early days of the relationship, passionate love means lovemaking that is hot, frequent, a joining of souls and downright amazing. You cannot keep your hands off each other and seize opportunities to get down and dirty in the bedroom.
Passionate lovemaking is intense and unforgettable. These are the most sensual and romantic lovemaking sessions, savoring moments.
How you look at each other and how your hands touch each other send different electricity in your body. You may look at him, and know that you’re home.
The way you kiss is also different, and you’ve never felt like this before. Your partner’s kisses, hugs, and caresses make you feel you want more.
You don’t tire of seeing your partner, and each lovemaking session is pure bliss.
This passionate lovemaking acts as a glue, bonding you together so that you can weather the inevitable moments—far into the future. Hopefully, the lovemaking will not be as passionate later and you can question your closeness.
But let us not think about that now. Enjoy this lovemaking, where you are very present and focused on your partner’s pleasure.
You learn each other’s sensual language, so slow down, listen to the other person, and make every second count.
If you look for a passionate lover meaning, you would see the characteristics of a romantic lover, but more intense. This person always feels that intense longing for their partner. From waking up to falling asleep, they fill their thoughts with yearning.
Passionate lovers want to be always close, and they crave physical connection. They kiss and make love so passionately that it makes the attachment stronger.
This is where you constantly check on them, asking them if you can meet or spend time together.
Do you think you feel passionate love?
10 passionate love signs
Passion and love are two powerful emotions. When they combine, they could influence your thoughts, actions, and reasoning.
Do you feel like you’re a passionate lover? If so, let’s check if you possess the signs of a passionate woman or man.
1. Influence your logical thinking
When you are in a passionate relationship, you may not notice it, but your logical thinking gets affected.
When you are in love, you can do the craziest things for this person. As they say, passionate love is addicting, which causes you to set aside your logical thoughts and do what you want.
Indeed, love will allow you to be spontaneous and even enjoy unusual things.
No one, including your best friends, can influence you to try out diving, but now that you’re in love, you see yourself open to diving.
Why? It’s because your partner loves it, and of course, you want to enjoy the things that make this person happy.
2. Make everything beautiful
When you understand passionate feelings, you see the world differently.
Somehow, the passionate love for your partner allows you to view things differently. You suddenly become a hopeless romantic, everything seems brighter, you enjoy love songs and savor their lyrics.
You smile more often; become optimistic; let go of minor issues; trust more and give more. Passionate love can make you happier.
3. Passionate love changes you
What are the signs he is a passionate lover? Do you share the same intensity and passion for each other?
We now know that passionate love can affect our decision-making skills, so it won’t be surprising that you or your partner have changed into a different version of yourselves.
If you notice your partner shows positive changes, that’s a good sign. We all want to be the better versions of ourselves.
Instead of getting irritated, you became more patient. You used to think movies about love are cheesy, but now, you enjoy them.
When you are in love, and if someone loves you, it can also boost your self-confidence and self-esteem.
4. Makes everything fun and exciting
You used to spend each day going to the office and back home. Your weekends would involve grocery shopping, sleeping, and watching Netflix.
Passionate love can change that. Suddenly, you have the extra energy to go hiking on weekends. You can still go to the park or spend a few hours talking to your partner.
Even a few hours in the park, holding each other’s hands sounds exciting and fun.
This is reality. It doesn’t mean you’re passionately in love with the right person.
If you choose the wrong person, passionate love can lead you to settle for unhealthy relationships.
Research shows that passionate love can serve as a form of natural addiction. You can justify wrong moves because of the high emotions you feel, the intense longing, and the overwhelming love you have for this person.
Since passionate love can influence your decision-making skills, even though people give you advice, you might turn a blind eye and still follow your heart.
9. Make you yearn for your partner intensely
One of the most common signs of passionate love is the constant yearning for your partner. You wake up and think of this person, and even before you sleep, you wonder what this person is doing.
Every chance you get, you would try to send him a text, call him, or look at his social media to see what he’s up to.
When you are starting your relationship, there will be times you want to ask your partner if it’s better to move in together.
This might all be okay if the intensity of passionate love is the same, but what if it’s not?
When you focus and give all your passion to your relationship without thinking about your partner’s reaction, you might sabotage the relationship early on.
Remember, too much of everything, including love, is not good.
10. Everything is fun
What does it mean when you feel the same intensity of passionate love? It’s when you are happily in love with each other.
It is when you finally see the meaning of your life. It’s when you can’t wait to build a future together. You trust, respect, and love one another to the point that you know you are destined to be with each other.
There is no denying it. You are now the best version of yourself, and you can’t wait to live the rest of your life.
Indeed, you are in love.
If you think you can relate to the signs of passionate love, here’s a quizthat will determine how passionate your love is.
Would passionate love be enough for your relationship to work?
Many of you will start asking, since passionate love is one of the most powerful emotions you could ever feel, is this enough to make a relationship work?
Can your passionate love be enough to surpass years of togetherness and trials?
The answer is no. It can help you get through the challenges, but passionate love is one of the many fundamentals of a long-lasting relationship.
Aside from passionate love, you also need respect, trust, intimacy, and commitment.
Without them, passionate love alone won’t work. Use your passion and love to make yourselves and your relationships stronger.
What causes passionate love to fade?
When passionately in love, you think that this beautiful dream will never end.
It’s like nothing can ever go wrong with your relationship.
Unfortunately, passionate love, no matter how intense, can fade away. But the question is, what would cause this?
How can something so intense and beautiful turn gray and dull?
1. You become too attached
If you find someone who gets your sense of attachment, that’s great. However, if you are passionately in love but you don’t have the same sense of attachment style, this may cause a problem.
Watch this video to understand better the different attachment styles that people can have:
Like most fairy tales, falling in love with someone can be perceived as a perfect emotion and the happily ever after that we all should aim for. Life is not like that.
However, we may still be influenced by fantasy, and at the beginning of this new relationship, it could feel like it is a dream come true.
Some people are addicted to the feeling of falling in love.
For a couple of months, you will live the life you want, the sweet smile, intimate lovemaking, and the excitement of passionate love. But what happens when you disagree with each other?
What happens when you see the not-so-perfect traits of your partner? Problems and misunderstandings could often lead to disappointment and intense love fades.
Being in love so passionately can cause someone to always yearn for attention. This person calls, texts, chats and even surprises you at work. Unfortunately, this can make your partner feel suffocated.
Famous quotes on passionate love
Here are some quotes about passionate love that will make you feel that love is beautiful and powerful.
“The hours I spend with you I look upon as sort of a perfumed garden, a dim twilight, and a fountain singing to it. You and you alone make me feel that I am alive. Other men it is said have seen angels, but I have seen thee and thou art enough.” – George Moore
“We loved with a love that was more than love.” – Edgar Allan Poe
“We efface an hour by passionate love, without twists, without an aftertaste. When it is finished, it is not finished, we lie still in each other’s arms lulled by our love, by tenderness, sensuality in which the whole being can participate.” – Anais Nin
“I can no longer think of anything but you. In spite of myself, my imagination carries me to you. I grasp you, I kiss you, I caress you, a thousand of the most amorous caresses take possession of me.” – Honore de Balzac
“You know you’re in love when you don’t want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Theodor Seuss Geisel
“We would be together and have our books and at night be warm in bed together with the windows open and the stars bright.” – Ernest Hemingway
“I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone.”- R. R. Tolkien
“If I know what love is, it is because of you.” – Herman Hesse
“Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other.” – Rainer Maria Rilke
“Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.” – Sarah Bernhardt
To sum it all up, passionate love is the state in which most loving relationships begin.
How long does this passion last?
It is really up to the individuals. For a lucky few, this hot passion can last a lifetime. But that takes effort and a dedication to being genuinely attentive to keeping the embers burning.
There is a usual ebb and flow to a passionate love for most couples. The trick is not to give up when the passion seems to dim. Passion can always be reignited with some work and attention from both parties.
We must also not forget the other aspects of a long-lasting relationship. As your relationship grows, your trust with one another deepens. The respect you have for each other should be stronger, and, of course, your vow to commit to one another shouldn’t be shaken.
Love freely and embrace the intoxicating feeling of passionate love, but remember that you should also nurture it so that the fire of your love will last.
While you may not find your way back to the level of heat that you experienced in your early days, you can rediscover another calmer type of passion that can be sustained and nurtured “until death do you part.”
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.