9 Ways on How to Apologize to Someone You’ve Hurt
We never plan to hurt someone, especially to those whom we love.
However, there are times when unknowingly we end up hurting them. Though we practice ‘I Love You’ a lot of times, we never plan on apologizing for someone.
It’s tough to say you’re sorry. You surely don’t want to just say it, but want to make them believe that you’re truly sorry.
Should you just say I am sorry or should you do something that will uplift your partner’s mood? Let’s have a look at various ways to how to apologize to someone you’ve hurt.
Never say ‘I put myself in your shoe’
One of the common mistakes that most people commit during apologizing is by they use ‘If I put myself in your shoe/place.’
Honestly, this looks good in reel than real life.
You can’t feel the pain or discomfort the person is going through. It’s all a dramatic line that should be avoided as much as possible during apologizing. So, avoid saying this phrase if you don’t want to upset your loved ones.
Acknowledging your mistake
Indeed! Until you’re not sure what have you done to hurt someone you love, why to apologize.
The entire foundation of saying sorry is based on the fact that you acknowledge your mistake. Unless you’re not sure what mistake you’ve committed there is no point in apologizing. So, make sure that you’re well aware of your mistake and are ready to acknowledge them.
Make this right along with saying sorry
Along with apologizing to them and saying that you’re sorry, you should also suggest a thing to make it up to them.
Sometimes the damage is such that you need to do something so that they forgive you for your mistake. So, while you’re apologizing, be prepared to offer them something to uplift their mood.
There is no place for ‘but’ while apologizing
We understand that you want to know ways on how to apologize to someone you’ve hurt, but the placement of ‘but’ changes the entire meaning of the sentence, right?
This is what happens when you’re apologizing to someone. You’re asking for forgiveness because you’ve hurt your loved one. When you’re doing so, there is no space for ‘but’ at all.
The moment you use ‘but’ in your sentence, it gives out a message that you’re not truly sorry and are trying to defend yourself for your act.
So, avoid the ‘but’.
Take complete responsibility for your action
It is you who have committed the mistake, no one else has done it on behalf of you.
So while apologizing, make sure that you take complete responsibility for your act. Don’t try to pass on the responsibility to someone else or involve them in your mistake. You want to sound like a grown-up person who is responsible for their actions.
So, be one and take the responsibility.
Promise that you won’t repeat it
When you’re saying sorry or apologizing you’re giving an assurance that you won’t repeat it again in future.
So, along with saying sorry, make sure you express this as well. This assurance shows that you care about your partner and don’t want to hurt them in any way by repeating the same mistake again.
Be authentic while apologizing
People can make out when you’re actually sorry about something or you’re just saying for the sake of it.
While apologizing, it’s important that you sound that you’re really sorry for what happened. Unless you’re really sorry about it, nothing can work.
The feeling will come only when you’ve acknowledged your mistake and are taking complete responsibility for your action.
The moment you are authentic, apologizing gets easy, and you can expect early forgiveness.
Don’t make excuses as it will escalate things to a different level
As said above, when you’re using ‘but’ while apologizing, you’re defending yourself.
Likewise, when you’re using any kind of excuse you’re trying to say that it’s not entirely your fault and you’re not sorry for what you’ve done. This isn’t the right way of apologizing and might take things to a different new level.
You surely don’t want to escalate things like this. So, never use excuse while apologizing to someone you have hurt.
Never expect immediate forgiveness
Most people think of immediate forgiveness while apologizing.
Well, it’s right, and you should never expect it.
After apologizing give them their space to come out of it. They were hurt and it would take them time to recover from that pain.
Expecting immediate forgiveness shows you don’t respect their emotions and all you care about is yourself. Trust us, if you’ve apologized correctly, they will forgive. It’s just a matter of time.
It’s important you’re aware of how to apologize to someone you’ve hurt so that they can forgive you easily. Listed above are some points that will help you seek forgiveness and will bring you both close to each other, again. Mistakes happen, but when you acknowledge and apologize for it, it shows how much that person matters to you.
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If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. By taking purposeful and a whole-hearted action, Sylvia feels that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one.
