3 Ways Separation in Marriage Can Make a Relationship Stronger
Your marriage is not going well. It started with small arguments about your partner’s habits and behavior, which has now grown into resentments with little to no communication between the two of you.
You find it hard to believe how your relationship has eroded with time, but even after all that is going wrong with your marriage, you still have hope or at least a glimmer of hope that everything would work out.
Well, one thing we can tell you for sure is that you are not the only one to have felt this way about their marital relationships.
Even the happiest of couples have been through many rough patches; however, the approach they took to deal with their relationship issues is what made them a successful couple.
You must understand that sometimes to find your way back to your partner; you need to take extreme measures. This also helps you to test the strength of your relationship and hopefully help you realize what you truly want.
This is exactly why opting for a marriage separation, or trial separation may be the answer to many of your relationship problems.
So if you have been wondering, can separation in marriage be good for a relationship? A quick answer to this question is yes.
Everyone thinks there is no logic in connecting separation from husband or wife and successful marriage, but in some cases, that’s exactly what a couple should do if they want to save their marriage.
Even though separation in marriage does have certain negative connotations, as it is considered a precursor to divorce, it can also be implemented as a way to gain perspective towards your relationship and eventually fixing your marriage.
Also watch: How to work on marriage during separation.
How does a separation help you make things better at home and how to deal with a separation in marriage?
The article presents marriage separation advice on what to do and what not to do during separation in marriage.
The following marriage separation guidelines would help you in dealing with separation in marriage and finding your way back to each other.
Having a clear thought
Initially, being alone and single would be endearing, as you won’t have to accommodate the needs of someone else in your daily routine.
You can eat what you want; you can sleep when you want. You might even feel like you are in college, and for a change, you have the monetary advantage that you might not have had during your college days.
It sounds like paradise, but the reality is you are not in college, and even though you had to adjust your routine to make time for your partner, they did the same for you.
You would realize that they were not dragging you down but enabling you with the gift of companionship, care, and above all, love.
By splitting up, both partners will soon know that single life was not what they thought it to be. Humans were not made to live by themselves or alone. They will start missing the other person shortly after the separation.
The time alone will help them have clearer thoughts about the relationship.
They will easily see the flows and the benefits of the single life. With that, it will be much easier to make a good decision about the marriage and realize that they want to be back in it.
Set the rules of separation in marriage
Separation in marriage doesn’t mean divorce, and that should be precisely understood.
It is best if the spouses agree to the terms and set some rules while being separated. It seems tragic, but going on a break can actually be a lot of fun.
The time span of the separation can be set before taking the big step so that the partners are sure of not losing each other. A period of three to six months is optimal, but even a year is ok.
During the separation, spouses can agree on the terms, are they going to see each other, are they going to hear each other, who’s going to be responsible for the kids, the house, the cars – and if there is a will, all this can become very interesting.
Read More: 6 Step Guide For How to Fix & Save a Broken Marriage
Partners can agree to date each other just the way when they were not married. They can see the beauty of the premarital life once again without cheating on each other.
When the agreed time ends, the couple will realize if there is still love between them, or the flame has gone.
Get a therapist, possibly together
Going to therapy after separation in marriage, but with a will to revive your relationship, is a great idea.
Counseling will help you see the other side, listen to the words of your partner, and understand how they feel about you and the separation.
At the same time, you will express your feelings for each other, and with the help of the therapist, the whole situation will become clearer and easier to resolve all issues.
It is important to know that problems in marriage are never one-sided. Both partners are a part of the problem, and they both need to work on the marriage in order to keep it healthy.
Reaching out to an expert can help you find the right tools in place on how to save a failing marriage and restore happiness in your relationship.
With their adequate training and credentials, they are the best and the most unbiased intervention to save your crumbling marriage.
Additional things to consider during a separation.
Ensuring that your separation in marriage amounts to something good, here are a few additional things you should keep in mind:
- Which spouse would be leaving home? Where will they stay?
- How will the property of the house be divided? These include cars, electronics, etc.
- How often will the other spouse visit the children?
- Sex and intimacy must be discussed openly. Will partners engage in intimate acts? Speak honestly about your feelings and concerns
- Agree that neither of you will seek help and advice from a lawyer
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If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.