If you’re finding it tough to even be alone together for more than a few minutes, let alone be intimate, take heart. As relationships mature, life happens.
We work hard at our jobs, spend endless hours taking care of basic daily tasks and helping others in our lives. Sometimes, our spouse ends up being the last person on our list. Because we know they will understand, and we can make it up to them later.
Still, if it’s been a while, you may feel a little awkward getting it started in the bedroom. No worries! Here are some ideas to spice things up in the bedroom and get your engines going.
1. Go away for the weekend
There’s nothing like a new place and forced alone time to up the sexiness factor.
Plus, you don’t even have to worry about making the bed! You can even relax, nap, and get some needed energy before your encounter. Just make sure to do the deed at least once or more for every day you’re away, ok?
2. Play a little game
Nothing makes sex more exciting than mixing things up. If you’re bored with the same old routine, then spice it up with a game. Perhaps set a timer and take turns choosing what to do next, or roll some of those sex dice to have the dice decide for you.
3. Sleep, exercise, food
Ok, so these things are not necessarily sexy, but they can lead to great sex! If you are tired all the time, don’t get any exercise, and eat terribly, then you will feel bad. One of the first things to do to spice up the bedroom is to level up your fitness, mental well-being, and hygiene.
If you feel yucky, you aren’t going to feel like having sex, or sex itself may not be as pleasant as it could be. Take care of your body, and intimacy will just get better and better.
4. Tell each other your fantasies
Maybe he’s always wanted to do it on the beach, and maybe she has always wanted to be literally swept off her feet. Now, time to play out those fantasies.
If you can’t actually play them out, pretending is fun, too. Set the mood, and make your fantasies come true
5. Switch things up
Try new sexual positions, new locations in the room or house, new music, a new time of day—the newness will make things more exciting than ever. Who knows?
You may even find something new you want to incorporate next time. But if you don’t, no worries. The point is to have fun trying!
6. Buy a book about sex
Spicing things up in marriage entails breaking the bedroom stalemate. One of the things to spice up the bedroom for him and her is to educate yourself.
Buy a book about sex and take turns reading it to each other; or find articles online that would be fun to read to each other and gain useful insights to enhance your sex life.
You never want to stop learning, especially when it comes to this subject. And be sure to educate each other on what your needs are!
7. New lingerie
Things to spice up the bedroom include some fancy lingerie. Grab your spouse’s attention or do it for your confidence.
Decide who gets to buy it, and then take the time to model it before it goes on the floor. Men are visual creatures and the anticipation, as well as the reveal, will make him melt.
Women, be confident as you strut in the room and start spicing it up in the bedroom.
8. Double the foreplay
How to spice up the bedroom? This one is for pleasing the ladies, who love the build-up almost as much as the main event. Touch her everywhere, be gentle, be thorough. You’ll know when she’s reached her limit.
All the extra time will be well worth it.
9. Initiate sex
If you’re not usually the initiator, then go for it. You may feel shy at first, but your boldness will make things riskier, more exciting— sexier.
10. Flirt more during the day
It’s all about anticipation. So why wait until you’re in the bedroom to get things heated?
Ways to spice up the bedroom for him or her include flirting all day long.
You’ll feel even more ready for what’s next by the time you close the bedroom door.
11. Enhance your bedroom’s ambiance
On how to spice up sex life, achieve the perfect bedroom ambiance, and do away with a cluttered, stressful bedroom. One instant way to spicing things up in the bedroom is a change in the scenery. It is a simple way to bring novelty in your sex life.
Light candles, use the silk sheets, warm up the room a bit, put on some soft music. Make the room as inviting as possible, and soon you’ll be lost in each other’s arms.
13. Be a little naughty
On how to spice things up in the bedroom, get out of your comfort zone, try new things to try in bed and take things up a notch.
Here are some more ideas to spice things up in the bedroom.
Do some dirty talk, give a little spank, make your spouse wear a blindfold, use a feather to tickle, why not be a tad bit naughty? Get ready to play with these tips to spice up the bedroom. With these fun ways to spice up your marriage sexually, you will never be stumped on what to do to set the sheets on fire.
If it’s out of the norm for you, it’ll make you and your spouse feel a little dangerous, making the whole experience that much more exciting. So get started with these ideas to spice things up in the bedroom, and outside the bedroom.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.