Most of us have considered or have attempted to rekindle a relationship. There are just some romantic connections worth a second chance. When you are really serious about doing so successfully, relationship advice certainly doesn’t hurt. Wondering how to rekindle a relationship with an ex and doing so successfully are two completely different things. It is easier to say, “We will see where it goes” but don’t you think a true connection deserves a little more effort? If so, continue reading to learn how to rekindle your relationship.
Decide if you really want to stay
Before focusing on how to rekindle a relationship or how to rekindle a marriage, first decide if you really want to stay. Be 100% honest with yourself and understand what you are committing to. Rekindling a relationship is a process that is full of romance and good times but couples must delve into serious topics as well. Overcoming past issues can be a challenge and it is up to you to decide if that is a task you’re up for. Aside from that there is the question of whether or not you think this person is the one for you among other things. The list of considerations is lengthy but do yourself a favor and carefully go through each one. If your heart and mind say yes, you want to work things out.
Omit any third parties
The rekindling process should only involve two people. When others get involved (like close friends and family), too much pressure is put on the relationship. Before you know it you are worrying about what other people want rather than what you want. Any matters of the heart are best kept private. Those in amazing relationships have one thing in common, they keep others out.
Lead with respect and kindness
When you want things to work, you need to get the rekindling off to a good start. The best way to do that is with relationship fundamentals that can be implemented throughout the relationship. One of those is respect. The problem is, we all know how to show respect but some do not know what it really means in a relationship.
Respect in a relationship means honoring boundaries, being open to compromise, being considerate, understanding, and most importantly, choosing your words wisely. Our words often get us in trouble and is the way we show disrespect the most. As for kindness, that part is easy. No one desires to be in a relationship that does not involve kindness. Positive attitudes and priorities make love last. Never strive to hurt your significant other’s feelings or prove him/her wrong. Instead, focus on promoting happiness and love.
Learn from past mistakes
Some suggest that couples looking to rekindle a romance should forget about the past. Of course both parties must overcome the past but they must also learn from mistakes. Mistakes are actually really valuable. Take a look at the mistakes you made when the romance started to go downhill. Could you have been more honest or more open? Perhaps you should have put the effort into being a better communicator. Did you sweat the small stuff and cause unnecessary tension? Whatever you did wrong, use your mistakes to make it right and change those behaviors. Now is your second chance.
At this phase in rekindling a relationship both parties have to focus on themselves and their behaviors. Both have to strive for personal growth. This isn’t the time to tell the other person what they did wrong but take steps towards becoming a better partner. When two people are able to grow and actually learn from past issues rather than harp on them, the chance of rekindling the relationship increases dramatically.
Really enjoy one another
Rekindling a relationship is a happy time for the two people involved. Both have the opportunity to reconnect on a mental, emotional and physical level. To make that connection, go on dates, get away for a while, squeeze in quality time whenever you can and make spontaneity part of your everyday life. In other words, welcome he/she into your life again.
Every relationship requires time and time is even more important when rekindling a romance. Being with the person you are reconnecting with allows you to experience them. You get to take in the little things that make them amazing like their intelligence, sense of humor and the way their eyes light up when they are passionate about something. Time with each other is the only way to truly enjoy one another.