1. Do you feel you and your partner manage to find a common language?
B. Most times
2. Do you ever say 'I am fine' even if you are not?
3. What happens if you and your partner can’t agree on a topic?
A. We agree to disagree and refuse to fight
B. We are upset for a while but we get over it
C. We keep fighting until someone gives in
D. We break up
4. Do you feel at peace with yourself when it comes to couples issues?
A. Yes, absolutely
B. Mostly yes
C. Not really
D. Not at all
5. You are angry for some reason and your partner steps in. What happens?
A. I express exactly what's bothering me
B. I am more reserved than usually
C. I ignore my partner
D. I take it out on my partner
6. What is active listening for you?
A. Being engaged in what my partner is saying without judging
B. Not missing even a word of what they have to say
C. Just showing your partner you are paying attention to their words
D. Listening carefully so that you can prepare some good counterarguments
7. How often do negative emotions take over your couple communication?
D. All the time
8. Your partner has done something wrong. What is your reaction?
A. I gently provide my opinion on the issue
B. I express disappointment
C. I give him/her the cold shoulder
D. I criticize and call him/her names
9. Which of the following statements would you choose?
A. You are a very considerate person, but calling my sister an idiot was not considerate
B. I feel hurt by you calling my sister an idiot
C. You are never able to hold your tongue, are you?
D. You are the idiot, not my sister!
10. What is your primary intention in an argument?
A. To be kind
B. To listen to what my partner has to say
C. To prove I am right
D. To defeat my partner