What Defines a Hopeless Romantic

Have you ever heard the expression “hopeless romantic?”  Maybe someone has said that you are one. Maybe you’ve thought that your partner might fall into that category.  Maybe you aren’t really sure what it means.

Someone who is described as a “hopeless romantic” is generally someone who has a big heart. They always see the best in people, especially their romantic partners, or with whom they are hoping to get romantic with.  

They tend to put their prospective partners up on a pedestal, not seeing any of their faults, and “filling in the gaps” or their story, with imagined wonderful traits and deeds.

Because of this, hopeless romantics get hurt more than the average, more-cautious people who do not plunge head-first into relationships.  

What are some of the other characteristics that define hopeless romantics?

They are optimists

Hopeless romantics are optimists in all parts of their lives, not only concerning love.

This is a rather endearing personality trait and one that is pleasant to be around.  They see everything sunny side up and rarely cast a critical eye around them. Another job/apartment/love story is “just around the corner” so they are usually fairly happy, hopeful people.

Their film of choice?  The sappy romance

Hopeless romantics love a good love story on screen.  They are perfect Hallmark movie consumers. Their favorite?  Anything by Nicholas Sparks, or films like “Love, Actually”, “The Holiday”, or “Valentine’s Day.”  

They watch them over and over and can repeat the dialogue by heart.  It’s cute until it becomes annoying to the non-hopeless romantics around them!

Flowers are not just for Valentine’s Day

 

The hopeless romantic sees the flower-delivery guy come into the office with a big bouquet of red roses and their heart rate quickens.  

It’s not their birthday nor is it any special occasion, but they still reserve hope that that impressive arrangement of long-stemmed roses is for them.  Why not?

They project feelings onto things that usually don’t have any

They get in a small bike accident and apologize to their bike, stroking it and taking extra care as they wheel it to the repair shop.  They make for really tiresome dog owners, always fretting about if the dog is getting enough love and is it lonely when they leave for work?  (They’ll likely install a pet cam just to check up on their dear little Fido.)

When their best friend complains about all the truly awful things her boyfriend does to her (stands her up, cheats on her, borrows money he never repays), rather than tell her to dump him, the hopeless romantic always see the silver lining and remains convinced that one day, the boyfriend will change and things will work out for them.

They love looking at wedding photos, even albums of people they barely know.  They even tear up at the vows video.

That birthing shows on TV?  They can’t watch them without crying.

When some couple they don’t know gets engaged in a public space, like a restaurant, they are over-the-moon thrilled for them, and do not find this act cheesy in the least.

They refuse to read articles about how outdated monogamy is, or watch TV shows that extol the virtues of polyamory, that claim it is the “natural” state of people to love several people at the same time.  

For hopeless romantics, monogamy is the only love model worth following.

They cried when Channing Tatum announced that his marriage was over.  (See Nicholas Sparks)

By the second date, they are already imagining their wedding trousseau and what kind of monogrammed pillowcases they should order.

They see beauty in everything

Because it is all connected to them.  You might think that is a weed growing out of the crack in the sidewalk; to the hopeless romantic it is a flower-to-be. The hopeless romantic remains optimistic that, even if the person has had six bad relationships behind them, the seventh will be “the one.”

Their favorite activity with their partner?

A toss-up between a long walk, or a shared bubble bath.  All while talking about their innermost feelings and emotions. They think love is part fate and destiny, and not much based on conscious pursuit or intent.  “It just happens,” they might say.

They firmly believe in love at first sight.

They believe there is a soulmate for everyone out there, someone who is their destiny from birth. When in a relationship, they not only celebrate their yearly anniversary but their monthly one.  And they have a special song.

First date?  They are over-the-top excited

They will spend an extraordinary amount of time thinking about their outfit, their makeup, their perfume and rehearsing what they will say and discuss.

They have an adorable level of enthusiasm that makes their friends smile.

Even when love doesn’t work out, they remain hopeful

The great things about hopeless romantics is that they are never dissuaded by a relationship failure.  “I’m one step closer to finding my better half” they will say after a breakup.

They invest energy in keeping their relationship happy and healthy

Because the hopeless romantic has specific expectations about what they require in a relationship, they don’t stay in bad relationships.  

And when they find a good match for them, they make sure to keep things happy and hot.  They are willing to put in the effort necessary to create a good relationship that will remain good over the long-term.