How do you know when you are in a ‘right person wrong time’ situation?
We have all felt like we met the right person at the wrong time in our lives, and this situation can be frustrating. When you meet the right person at the wrong time, you may feel overwhelmed and even defeated.
Looking back to realize that the timing was wrong, but the person was right can feel like a punch in the gut.
We are told that timing in relationships is everything, just as it is in life. Meeting the right person at the wrong time is a common occurrence that can lead to many regrets and drastically change your trajectory in life.
This article will list 15 signs that you have met the right person at the wrong time, and we help you figure out what you can do about it.
Is it possible to find the right person at the wrong time?
When you have met the right person, it should feel like a dream come true. Like the Disney movies that we all watched as kids, the birds should sing, and the skies should clear.
Many of us believe that everything should fall into place, and things should be perfect. We think that the right love should make us feel lighter on our feet, and all obstacles standing in our way should move aside.
While this may be what we have been taught to believe, it is, unfortunately, not usually the case. The right person can walk into your life at the wrong time, and it can put a damper on your life plan.
What does it feel like when you meet the right person at the wrong time?
Meeting the love of your life at the wrong time may seem impossible. After all, why would fate be so cruel? And isn’t fate… Well, fate? Isn’t it supposed to work out no matter what because it is meant to be? Unfortunately, No.
So many factors impact love, and timing is only a tiny aspect of a bigger picture. While it plays a vital role, timing is not always everything, as we have been led to believe.
This article will help you understand this common issue and provide you with some ‘right person, wrong time’ advice that can save a lot of stress and tears.
If you have met the right person at the wrong time, this article might be able to help.
15 signs you’ve met the right person at the wrong time
What if you met the right person at the wrong time? How would you know? What would you do? Many people have said ‘we met at the wrong time’ when asked about past relationships.
If this has happened to you, there are things that you can do and luckily, we have some tips for surviving a ‘right person wrong time’ situation.
Despite popular beliefs, timing is not everything, and many things can help you get through this right person wrong time relationship. With a bit of help, you can still come out on top and live happily ever after.
1. They are not single
You have a spark with someone but discover they are already taken. Perhaps the other person feels it too, and the attraction is mutual. Cheating is not an option and is not a good idea.
Life can feel highly unfair when you meet the right person at the wrong time. However, it is best not to get involved with someone who is already with someone else.
Take a step back and let the situation play out. If the spark is as strong as you thought, they will end their relationship eventually.
2. They are newly single (or you are)
Meeting someone you connect with only to discover that they have just left a long-term relationship can be frustrating.
The same issue arises when you have just ended a long-term relationship. It can be challenging not to jump into another one.
You know it is a right person wrong time situation when you feel that connection but find that they (or you) are not over the dreaded ex. The old saying, time heals all wounds is essential in this instance. Allow the time needed to recover.
If you genuinely believe that they are the one for you, they will be there when the time is right.
When you meet the right person at the wrong time, you may find that your long-term goals are too different. Perhaps you want a big family, and they want to travel the world, staying in hostels and partying all night long.
Even when your goals do align, there may be an issue with your differing mindsets. One of you could be lightyears ahead of the other.
Unless you are ready to throw your aspirations into the trash to be with someone that has different plans than you, it is best to check things off your bucket list so that you are ready to settle down later.
4. You are very different people
You love green, and they prefer red. You enjoy your big family, and they like to keep to themselves. If you go up and they go down, you may find yourself in the right person, wrong time situation.
In this case, it is best to take some time to figure out who you are and decide on which priorities in life matter to you the most.
5. There is someone (or something) else
It is not always another relationship creating the right person at the wrong time. Perhaps the other person has a child from a past relationship, and this child requires their attention at the moment. It could be that their mother is aging and requires round-the-clock care.
Many things make it impossible to maintain a loving and supportive relationship, and it is best to allow these things to run their course.
If they are the right person and it is simply the wrong time, things will work out in the future.
6. One of you is too invested in your career
Being more committed to a career than a relationship is going to be a significant issue. No matter the job, if they are not ready to put it aside, a relationship will not work out.
It is best to allow the other person space to explore their career opportunities. Once the career gets where it is going, you may have a chance to rekindle what you started with better luck.
7. There are opportunities elsewhere
This situation can happen to either of you. You meet someone that you like. You feel a deep connection and want to explore where it will go, but you are presented with an opportunity elsewhere. Whether traveling, moving, or relocating for work, this issue can significantly impact your dreams.
While it may seem selfish, people must follow their dreams and work to attain their goals. If that requires a move across the country or worldwide, you need to support that fact.
It is best to allow healing rather than adding more to an already swelling pile in this situation. Give them the space they need to become healthy and support them from the sidelines.
9. Commitment instills fear
Let’s be honest. Finding the right person at the wrong time could be as simple as a fear of commitment.
If you, or the person you are with, are just too scared to commit, then things will not work. Acceptance and a clear understanding of what it means to be in a loving, committed relationship are vital to success.
10. There is a distance that cannot be fixed
Perhaps you have found the right love at the wrong time because of the distance between you. Maybe they live in another city, a different state, or another part of the world. This problem is more a right person wrong place issue, and it can be very frustrating.
Thankfully, this particular issue does not mean you must give up on love and resign to being alone. There are plenty of couples that make long-distance relationships work. If you are committed to one another, distance should not interfere with your desire to be happy.
11. The age difference cannot be overcome
Is age just a number? It is hard to say. Age can cause significant problems when it comes to romance.
One familiar right person, wrong time complaint is the age gap that some couples encounter. Perhaps you are younger or older than your partner, and maybe one of you is more mature than the other.
Often this issue is more about a difference in goals or lifestyles than it is age. Someone in their 20s will have different plans than someone in their 40s, and they will usually live a different lifestyle.
While you can overcome the age gap issue with effort and understanding, you cannot change it. Age is a fixed trait. You will not get younger no matter how much you wish you could, and you may find yourself thinking we have the right love at the wrong time.
Whether you or them, if either of you is not ready to be in a committed relationship, you will find yourself with the right love at the wrong time. You cannot persuade someone to be with you and expect the situation to be healthy.
Give them the space they need to breathe and trust that it will work out when the time is right.
13. There is still growing to do
One of the most difficult right people, wrong time situations arise when there is personal growth to be done. While being in a strong, healthy relationship can help you grow as a person, sometimes you just need to grow independently.
Self-esteem, self-exploration, and self-worth all require you to know who you are independent of others. While most of us learn about ourselves when we are young, we change and evolve with time.
You may need to check in with yourself once in a while to ensure that you have done your soul searching before jumping into a relationship. If you do not explore who you are, you will wonder what else is out there.
14. There is a need for freedom right now
Perhaps age is a factor, or maybe there is a freedom that is craved. Whatever the cause, a need to have freedom can interfere with the creation of a long-term relationship.
If freedom is what you or your partner crave, no amount of begging will change this desire.
Forcing someone to stay in one place when all they want to do is spread their wings and fly will make both of you miserable and leave you saying we met at the wrong time.
15. They are not the right person for you
As harsh as it may sound, there is a chance that meeting the right person at the wrong time is simply meeting the wrong person.
There is no way to know if you are meant to be with someone, so it is possible that the relationship is not working out because it is not meant to work. You must trust the process. If something is meant to be, it will, but only when the time is right and everyone is ready.
Two people who are meant to be together will be, despite differences and because of them.
Fate does not mean that everything works out just because you want it to, rather than things work as they should when they should.
There is not one single person in the world for you. There are many. Even if it did not work with this one, there would be other opportunities later down the line. Have faith.
Do not force things
A relationship that is meant to be should not require taxing effort or cause significant stress. Forcing someone to do something they do not want to do will make them, and you, miserable.
Do not ignore the signs
There will be signs when you meet the right person at the wrong time. You must pay attention to these signs and not ignore what they are telling you. Forcing a relationship that is not meant to be is not suitable for anyone.
The bottom line
No matter how right someone may seem to be for you, things are sure to be difficult if the timing is wrong.
Meeting the right person at the wrong time can be frustrating and leave you feeling defeated, but it is not a reason to give up hope. Many situations where we met the right person at the wrong time can be remedied with a bit of effort and a desire to succeed.
If it is work that is stopping you, for example, start slow. Try dating the person casually without pressure and see where it goes. If it is distance holding you back, find a way.
The truth is that when something is truly meant to be, you will be provided with opportunities to make it work.
Stay true to yourself and have trust in fate. Things will work out as they should.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.