The saying is true that distance makes the heart go fonder, the fact that we haven’t seen the face of our loved ones add to the anticipation, the building desire to be close to them, this wait not only makes our heart grow fonder of our beloved but also makes us love them harder in the process.
What is a long-distance relationship?
According to Definitions from Oxford Languages, a long-distance relationship means,
A romantic relationship between two people who live far apart and so are unable to meet on a frequent basis.
For many people, having a long-distance relationship with someone who has an entirely different postal code may be hard.
Still, for those who are already invested in such emotional connections, one important long-distance relationship advice is to understand that such commitment is hard, but so worth it when you finally meet your beau!
So, the question arises, why do people opt for such emotionally exhaustive relationships, anyway? And more importantly, are they worth it in the end?
We address these questions and some essential long-distance relationship advice in this article!
Why do people go through long-distance relationships willingly?
Now, when we talk about the will, we’re really talking about circumstances surrounding the LDR.
One might raise doubts- Do long-distance relationships work?
Most people don’t want to stay away from the apple of their eyes, but they are compelled to do so due to various factors, the job being the most prominent among them.
Also, most couples meet up through institutions like high school and colleges, who often share different life ambitions. In the world we know today, most men and women are meeting up through various online dating websites, which link them to people all around the world with common likes and interests.
So, most people form an LDR on the basis of trust, effective communication, and the belief that they are doing this for a better future together, a better life together. Their love for each other prevails over the hardships of a long-distance relationship.
Below are some reasons why people prefer long-distance relationships:
LDR gives them the freedom
Long-distance relationships give a lot of freedom to live on one’s own without a partner’s interference. For people, who prefer space and a lot of me-time, such relationships are a boon as they don’t have to think about their partner before making plans and still enjoy the perks of love.
Couples fight less
Distance does make the heart grow fonder. In LDRs, couples avoid quarrels as they stay far apart and relatively, spend less time together. So, practically, less time means less room for misunderstandings and resentment.
You learn patience
You learn to be patient and wise in the relationship as you understand that the situation is temporary, and you wait for it to be over. And that is how you earn to be patient in the relationship, by holding onto your emotions and having faith that you both will meet soon.
You have time to pursue your interest
Since you both are living away from your partner, you save time on hangouts and dates. That means you have more time to give to yourself and work on your passions, hobbies, and interests.
Struggles of long-distance relationships
Of course, we cannot simply ignore the harsh realities you have to face while you are invested in a long-term relationship, some of which we have outlined below:
Different time zones can take a toll on how much you communicate with each other; this can really strain your relationship.
The fact that you sometimes have to miss out on important events such as anniversaries and birthdays.
While it is a fact that LDRs are hard, most people are often even compelled to analyze when to let go of a long-distance relationship, but all of that depends on how much both of you are willing to make this work.
20 long-distance relationship advice
How to maintain a long-distance relationship?
Starting a long-distance relationship might seem like an exciting idea. You would look at the bright side of things and be ready to face all odds. However, there are some long-distance relationship advice to survive it because such a relationship is purely based on understanding and trust.
So, here are some long-distance relationship advice for handling the relationship:
One of the most essential long-distance relationship tips is to establishregular communication. It is essential to talk about everything, whether it’s about mundane things of the day. Send audio and video clips too to keep things interesting.
Avoid bringing up situations that could crop up arguments. If your partner dislikes late-night partying, assure them beforehand before you make any such decisions.
Practice honesty. No matter what, stay true to each other in the relationship. Manipulation can cause havoc in the relationship.
Talk dirty to each other just like you would do if you both were around. Keep your intimacy game strong by expressing your sexual desires through teasing texts.
Set low expectations in the relationship. You both must discuss some ground rules so that none of you are taken by surprise.
Let people know you are in a long-distance relationship. You have to come clean and not hide your relationship.
Ensure you are serious in the relationship. Also, try to gauge your partner’s intentions. There’s no point in working hard over a long-distance relationship and putting in your efforts when either of you doesn’t seek a long term relationship.
Do things you wouldn’t have done if your partner was around. You can pursue a hobby and invest your time productively.
Don’t over-communicate. It will only lead to misunderstandings if you both are talking to each other 24*7.
Surprise your partner every once in a while with a visit. It’s not nice to spend so much time apart. Make sure you both see each other in an interval of two or three months.
Assumptions are a risky thing in a long term relationship. Long term relationships are more fragile. So, try to remain positive and don’t believe everything you hear or you think in your head.
Consider your long-distance relationship like a normal relationship. The more you will think about the distance, the more it will weigh you down.
Make it stress-free. Don’t keep thinking about it all day long and hamper your routine. Remember, the more you think, the more unnecessary thoughts you will build in your head.
Always remind your partner that you love them. Avoid engaging in boring and mundane conversations all the time. Every once in a while, get romantic and let your partner know they mean the world to you.
Another long-distance relationship advice is to engage in LDR activities like craft-building or early morning walks or other games.
One of the essential tips on long-distance relationships is to pamper your partner with gifts. Send customized presents for your partner and express your love for them.
Don’t keep your expectations too high. Remember, your partner isn’t perfect. So, you must not hope everything will always be fine in the relationship. There’s beauty in being flawed too.
Remember, it’s okay to fight, sometimes. The argument is healthy, and it often brings a positive outcome. So, don’t consider it a sign of breakup at every instance.
Accept different dynamics and changes in the relationship. Every relationship goes through different phases, and yours will go through many too. Consider it normal, and don’t feel anxious.
In the video below, Kim Eng shares there is nothing wrong with expectations, but we should not become overly attached.
Instead, we need to inquire into the source of those expectations to determine whether they are healthy and reasonable or arise from the unconsciousness of the pain-body. Watch this video as a piece of fruitful long-distance relationship advice.
Are long-distance relationships worth it in the end?
So, how to make a long-distance relationship work?
We’ll be honest with our long-distance relationship advice. Engaging yourself in the LDR with someone who is so many miles away from you is hard, and it is not something you can take lightly. It will take effort, time, and a lot of trust to withhold the sentiment.
But, imagine when you finally meet your best friend, the person who you love, after all this time! You learn to appreciate their touch, smell, and their quirks.
You learn to understand how beautiful your bond is, and that it is worth everything. Imagine how lovely it would be to hold their hands and not put your hand on screens to connect?
The little moments make all the hardships worth it. Love can overcome anything if it indeed exists.
How long can a long-distance relationship last?
There’s really no answer to this question. It can last until the relationship is back to normal after decades of deployment or it can last a few weeks.
It is up to both partners to decide how to make a long-distance relationship work. Some relationships are only a hundred miles away and fail, while there are some in different countries and succeed.
It is a matter of sacrifice. How much are you willing to sacrifice for your partner? Both partners are unfulfilled in long-distance relationships, so if there is no hope of a future together, then there’s no point in thinking about “will long-distance relationship work” between the two of you.
There needs to be a deadline, something both partners are looking forward to, a day sometime in the future that both of you can be together forever. That is the key to making a long-distance relationship succeed.
If you are asking Do long-distance relationships work in different countries? Yes, it can. The distance itself isn’t an issue. They can be one city away and it can still be a long-distance relationship.
As long as the couple is discussing a realistic future together, the long-distance relationship has a chance of working.
A chance is just a chance. It still needs a lot of effort to succeed. Both partners have to work harder than normal couples to stay loyal and keep each other satisfied.
If you are the type who is not willing to go through hoops for your relationship, then don’t even bother thinking about “do long-distance relationships work?” It will not.
long-distance relationships are hard, unfulfilling, and full of challenges. Just like any other worthwhile endeavor like starting a business or staying married after 25 years.
Before getting into it, think about how much you value your partner, what kind of future awaits you as a couple, and most importantly are you both on the same page. If all three questions are in the extreme positive, then go ahead and do it.
Long-distance makes the heart go fonder, some people prefer to wait for their loved ones to come back, and some decide to relocate. We live in a world where love can truly thrive if we only let it. A thousand miles can’t possibly stop from a heart to love!
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action.