Physical intimacy in marriage for married couples can be something of a minefield—physical intimacy is an expectation in most people’s view of relationships, but everyone has their own particular preferences and nuances when it comes to just what types of physical intimacy they feel comfortable engaging in.
Intimacy and marriage
Intimacy between couples can be defined as is being open and vulnerable with your partner, fearlessly.
Intimacy for couples can sometimes be an elusive concept, even for those who are deeply in love, and yet have trouble connecting and being vulnerable with each other. Intimacy for married couples can be critical to the relationship satisfaction.
What is physical intimacy?
Physical intimacy between couples is an act or exchange of feelings including close companionship, platonic love, romantic love or sexual attraction. Physical relationship after marriage can be a critical element in strengthening a relationship. For a married couple, intimacy includes physical, emotional and spiritual close, inherent to the happiness of a close couple.
That’s why it won’t be an exaggeration to say that marriage and intimacy go hand in hand.
Examples of physical intimacy include being inside someone’s personal space, hand holding, hugging, kissing, cuddling, caressing and consensual sexual activity.
Roadblocks to intimacy in marriage
For married couples, differences in a desire for physical intimacy can create some pretty serious problems if it is not addressed early on. Apart from that, there are some other common obstacles that lead to a dwindled level of physical intimacy with husband or wife, among couples.
- Clutter in your intimate relationship environment can offer the most defining roadblock to physical relationship between husband and wife. An untidy bedroom space, piles of dishes in sink, heaps of laundry – can not allow for a space to connect intimately with your partner.
- Not including a satisfying amount of intimacy in your relationship is a potential threat to your marriage.If you are not prioritizing intimacy and time with your partner, you need to re-calibrate your schedules, appointments and activities to carve put time to to improve physical intimacy in marriage.
- Emotional unavailability of a partner can seriously stunt the physical intimacy in marriage. To sustain intimacy in a relationship, you need to break the deep rooted emotional barriers and be more open to your partner.
To overcome roadblocks to intimacy in marriage, let’s take a closer look at some of the most important do’s and don’ts of physical intimacy in marriage for married couples.
Do: Make sure you’re both comfortable
It’s very important in any relationship – married or not – to make sure that your partner is comfortable with what you are doing. If they aren’t comfortable—then stop.
When you’re engaging in any physically intimate activity, make sure to be aware of how your partner is reacting; even if they don’t verbally proclaim any displeasure; their body language may indicate they don’t feel comfortable with certain activities.
Don’t: Try to force your expectations
It can be easy to push your expectations on your partner in a married relationship, especially if you place a high importance on certain acts of physical intimacy in marriage.
However, trying to force your own personal expectations onto someone else does not work in the end and may make your intimacy issues even more complicated. Instead of forcing your expectations on your partner, talk to them about your feelings, their feelings, and attempt to find some common ground you can both agree on, before you become physically intimate.
Do: Improve intimacy in an appropriate way
It’s perfectly fine to try to improve physical intimacy in your marriage, as long as you aren’t forcing your partner to be uncomfortable. There are many ways to appropriately improve physical intimacy in marriage, which include but aren’t limited to:
- Encouraging activities that put you and your partner physically close together, such as riding carnival rides together, sitting together when you watch movies, sitting next to each other at restaurants, swimming together, riding a bike in tandem, etc.
- Engaging in smaller, less overt physically intimate gestures such as holding hands in public rather than cuddling, hugging or kissing in public.
- Cherishing seemingly ‘small’ physical moments, such as brushing hair out of your partner’s eyes, putting your arm around their arm, or simply sitting very close together on the sofa or in bed.
Don’t: Forget that there may be an underlying issue
You may assume that because you’re married, you will automatically know everything there is to know about your partner.
In reality, however, this is not the case; sometimes, people have underlying issues which can cause them to feel reluctant with certain types of physical intimacy in marriage.
For example, some people who grew up in households where physical affection was not expressed may feel uncomfortable with physical intimacy in marriage later on in life. Talk with your partner about any underlying issues that may have a role to play in impeding your physical closeness.
Inspiring ideas for enhancing intimacy with your partner
- If your bedroom seems to inspire no bed-breaking moments, head for the nearest hotel for instant intimacy.
- Spice up your partner’s day with flirty texts and by the time they are back home, you would be all fired up for a steamy sack session.
- Shower together or enjoy a luxurious bath tub time.
- Massages are so relaxing and intimate, offer one to your partner, and they will be returning the favor in no time, creating a lovely tenderness between the two of you.
Here are some more intimacy ideas for married couples that will work wonders for enhancing physical intimacy in marriage.
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More by Mary Fisher