Common Intimacy Issues in Marriage That Cause Discord Between Couples
By Sylvia Smith
By Sylvia Smith
Writer
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com...
9.5k Reads
Updated: 24 Sep, 2019
Intimacy is not just relevant to sex, but a deeper understanding of the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with.
Without intimacy in a marriage, it is just a contract with legal consequences. However, when there is intimacy in a marriage, it is one of the most beautiful feelings a person could ever ask for.
Let us overview some of the most common intimacy issues in marriage you should avoid in order to have a fulfiling and happy life!
Expecting monogamy but no action
If you expect your partner to remain faithful in your marriage, you should be willing to give them the reason to be faithful. Your partner has their share of sexual needs and they must be fulfiled.
If you barely have sex with your partner, this may lead to them searching elsewhere for fulfilment.
Lack of fulfilment
Lack of fulfillment is one of the most major intimacy issues in relationships that plagues marital happiness. In such cases, marriage becomes a pressure rather than a relief, as the constant tension between you and your partner is only increasing with no action.
Talk to your partner about it with an open heart and discuss your needs.
Tell them that your needs are both emotional and sexual, and finding sexual comfort from other sources won’t lead to emotional support.
The awkward sex
It happens to every one of us in our lives and it’s just a situation you have to deal with.
Sometimes you’re sleeping and your partner gets aroused out of nowhere at 3 am in the morning.
Sometimes you both are talking about something serious and the next moment they are on top of you, believing that this will solve all the problems in the world.
Entering into a marriage does mean that you and your partner are now lawfully wedded and whatever you do in your sex life with each other is permissible.
That, however, does not give anyone the license to skip the foreplay and the intimate talk and then start right away with the sex. This rather causes a fear of intimacy in one of the partners.
Misalignment in intimacy levels
Misalignment in intimacy levels and desires of partners is a strong catalyst in giving rise to intimacy issues in marriage.
Remember that sex only satisfies your body, it’s romance and foreplay that satisfies the soul!
It’s her problem
No intimacy in marriage? It’s always her problem, isn’t it?
It’s one of the most common and equally bizarre intimacy issues in marriage and one that has more to do with the perception of women. When you’re trying to conceive but can’t, it can become a mental challenge for both you and your partner. Even if your husband has fathered a child in the past, that doesn’t automatically mean they are still potent.
In such situations, it is best to get a full body check up to discover who has the underlying issue. While it may not solve the intimacy issue, it will, however, help both of you realize the physiological problems that affect your sex life and help overcome intimacy issues in marriage.
Too exhausted to engage in sex
One of the intimacy issues in marriage that frequently rears its ugly head is when either of the partners is not up for sex.
It could be attributed to a hectic job or an insipid but all-consuming family life. It can be a blow to your married life if as a sex couple you lose the closeness and intimacy that you once shared with your partner.
Scheduling sex and planning weekly date nights can be the answer to sprucing up your married sex life.
Having said that, be mindful of balancing scheduling with a strong sense of spontaneity to restore intimacy in your married life.
Watching porn and forming delusional images
Watching porn with your partner can contribute to healthy sex lives when watched in measured proportion.
However, porn can become a problem if one partner doesn’t like the other watching porn, while other partner builds porn addiction and forms an unrealistic fantasy of a potential sexual partner who doesn’t exist. This can lead to lack of intimacy in marriage, a serious emotional discord between a couple a rise of tons of intimacy issues in marriage.
Marriage success and intimacy are largely intertwined
Intimacy issues in marriage can sabotage the love bond between you and your spouse, beyond repair.
Marriage intimacy problems in the bedroom can be a prelude to irreparable damage in your relationship with your spouse. No intimacy in marriage consequences include infidelity, lack of self esteem, broken connection with spouse, deep seated resentment, separation or divorce.
If intimacy issues are cropping up in your marriage, take it as a warning alarm that danger lies ahead. Take stock of things and work at resolving these intimacy issues in marriage for a fulfiling married life.
How to overcome intimacy issues in marriage
No intimacy in a marriage doesn’t just vanish into thin air.
To overcome problems with intimacy in marriage, it is important to seek counseling, to rekindle passion in your marriage and reverse the no intimacy in marriage consequences.
Before intimacy issues in marriage lead to an irreparable damage of permanent loss of connection with your spouse, reach out to an expert who can help you recognize intimacy issues in a marriage.
During counseling you will have an unbiased third party who will address sexual intimacy issues as well as emotional intimacy issues in your marriage, help you find answer to the question “how to overcome intimacy issues”, assist you in rebuilding marriage intimacy, and employ marriage intimacy exercises to enjoy a more fulfiling life with your spouse.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. By taking purposeful and a whole-hearted action, Sylvia feels that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one.
