Intimacy is a quality usually associated with healthy and long-lasting relationships. According to psychologists, intimacy is a central developmental task throughout adulthood and in order to be truly intimate with someone, individuals need to have a strong sense of identity in the first place. Intimacy is so important for people because its absence represents an obstacle to self-fulfillment – and some individuals unfortunately remain isolated and experience difficulties. What about you, how intimate are you in your relationships?
1. Can you let other people see you as you really are?
A. No problem with that
B. Yes, most times
C. Not really
D. No, I am always wearing some sort of mask
2. Do you understand how the other person feels?
A. Yes, I am very empathetic
B. Most times
3. Do you like to listen to your partner’s concerns?
A. Yes, I could have become a psychologist
B. Most times yes
C. Sometimes I pretend to listen, but yes
D. No, I find this annoying
4. Do you feel emotionally bound to your partner?
B. Most of the time
C. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't
D. No, I feel isolated
5. How do you react when you get angry with your partner?
A. I express my feelings honestly
B. I am afraid he or she will leave me
C. I regret getting into this relationship
D. I leave without talking about it
6. How can you describe your relationship with your partner?
A. So intense I could not imagine my life without him or her
B. An important part of my life
C. Satisfactory but not as important as other life aspects
D. Not satisfying, distant
7. Something good happens to you – what do you do next?
A. Immediately announce my partner
B. Share the news with my partner but not give this a priority
C. Celebrate on my own and eventually announce my partner as well
D. Rewarding myself with something I like doing and not telling my partner
8. Do you ever explore your feelings when talking to your partner?
A. Most times
B. We discuss both practical and emotional issues
9. What do you do when it’s just the two of you?
A. Talk about sweet nothings
B. Use the time to relax
C. Watch a good film
D. Talk about the problems we are having at the moment
10. You are intimate with each other when the phone suddenly rings. What do you do?
A. Ignore the phone
B. Reject the call
C. Curse the intrusion and get distracted
D. Pick up the phone because it might be important