How to Forgive Your Partner Who Has Hurt You

How to Forgive Your Partner Who Has Hurt You

The ability to forgive and let go of your partner’s hurtful mistakes is the key to contentment in married life.  Every relationship, let alone the one between a man and a woman, faces hiccups due to various reasons. Did your partner cheat on you? Did they lie to you?  And has this left you feeling distressed and unhappy all the time? It is important to realize that people are imperfect, full of errors. That is what makes them human.  Every partner who works along the lines of this school of thought shall be able to forgive their partner, for whatever reason they might have hurt you. How to forgive your partner who has hurt you? Here are some helpful analogies towards a better and stronger relationship.  

1. Do it for yourself

When your partner has hurt you, you feel the urge to hurt them the same way. However, in doing so, you will be giving rise to even more complications in the relationship. If not for the partner, you must forgive them for your own sake, for your peace of mind. The more grudges you will hold against your companion regarding their mistakes, the more mental stress you will be putting yourself into. So forgive them for yourself, because you don’t deserve this.

2. Understand what happened and why did it hurt you

Look back to the incident which hurt and upset you. Accept that it happened. Establish the causes of why it hurt you. Perhaps, it could be a deep-rooted problem which you dislike about yourself and has been mirrored before you in the shape of your partner’s doing. Reevaluation of the incident is very crucial to get to the point where a solution can be achieved. You must analyze why what the partner did hurt you so as to be able to truly forgive them.

3. Acceptance of each other

Another way of how to forgive your partner who has hurt you is to accept certain behaviors of them. When you get into a committed relationship with someone you happen to know some of the behaviors they possess already. When the relationship has been continuing for a long time, you get more accustomed to how your partner behaves in different circumstances.  Initial fights and arguments in a relationship reveal the other partner’s overall nature and attitude towards dealing with issues. If a certain behavior does not change and same problems keep arising due to that, it is best to simply accept some things so no more fights take place. Once you accept your partner’s certain manners, you do not get so annoyed and are easily able to forgive them and move on.

Acceptance of each other

4. Don’t sleep with an angry mood

While many of you may think that after getting into a fight with your partner who has hurt you, the best option is to sleep it off as you are too furious to talk to them. On the contrary, it has been found that sleeping with an angry mood is going to keep you from a stress- free sleep which will affect your brain activity the entire night.  Also, when you wake up the next day, you are going to be equally or even more angry than the night before. Discussing the matter then and there gives you both the opportunity to see the situation with more clarity and feel better sooner. Thus, whenever you are caught up in a similar circumstance, be vigilant to talk it out before you go off to sleep.  This will lead to a quick reconciliation of the matter.

5. Be patient

You must not push yourself into forgiving your partner in order to feel fine. It must happen on its own time. Be patient with the process and allow yourself to feel any emotions that are expected of you, as you are hurt. If you jump to the step of forgiveness without actually letting yourself fully comprehend and accept the situation, it may lead to bigger problems.  One of the problems with repressed emotions and feelings is that they may eventually outburst at a wrong time.

6. Own your emotions

Your feelings are your own. It is in your hands to allow how much a situation discomforts you. The better control you have on your anger, the easier it becomes for you to feel better and eventually forgive your partner for their mistakes.  

Forgiving your partner for their mistakes does not mean that you forget what they did.  It’s vital to understand that it is not about vengeance or winning against your partner. When you love them you always find a way to forgive them. Following the above-mentioned steps will not only benefit your relationship but also prove to be good for your own mental and physical health.

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