Are you at a point where you are not sure whether to end the marriage or continue to stay with the hope of a better fulfilling marriage? The relationship is at a break point, this is the moment to leave marriage to give yourself ample pace without the influence of a partner to rejuvenate and strategize on whether you still want to give it a try or you want to end it. Leaving a marriage is not ending it, although, depending on the issues, you might end up with a divorce. It should be a mutual agreement then open lines of communication especially the partner who opts for such a decision.
It is a heart breaking experience; the thought of having to start life afresh away from your spouse builds guilt and betrayal. If you have stayed together for more than 5 years then you need the right third party affiliations to go through it without any mental torture. What may warrant you to leave a marriage?
1. Emotional responsibility
Marriage is an affair of two parties when one feels he bears the emotional burden to make it work, it communicates a feeling of discontentment. When the same spouse takes all the responsibility of keeping the love life alive, definitely, it emotionally drains him/her opting to give the other partner space as a test on whether he/she plays an important role in their lives.
The worst scenario comes when you express your feelings to your partner and he makes no effort to salvage the marriage then there is no option but to leave the relationship to raise a red flag on the impact of ignoring one’s emotions.
2. Financial misunderstandings
As the family grows, financial responsibility also increases. Marriage therapists advise couples to be open with their finances and make a budget on all financial expectations. If one partner opts to keep be secretive on the financial records giving a single partner to shoulder all the financial obligations in the family, it communicates the lack of love and respect to the responsible spouse. It also means there is lack of commitment to the marriage. How can you have money in the family and allow your partner to take care of all the financial needs without your help? That is not marriage.
3. Lack of sexual fulfillment
When you leave your parents’ house to get married- you are looking for three things in order of priority: companionship, sexual fulfillment, and children. Young couples are sexually active, in fact, the frequency and intensity of their sexual urge are higher than older couples. What happens when one partner opts to deny the other conjugal rights with no valid reason? The feeling of rejection and falling out of love crops up which further makes the “denied” partner seek solace elsewhere.
When the action comes to the realization of the partner; betrayal and mistrust take center stage in the union. Of course, you can reconcile and seek forgiveness. What happens when the partner cannot let go of the new relationship?
4. Mismatch leading to constant argument
Misunderstanding in the early years of marriage is normal. With the help of your parents or a counselor, you go through the stage with ease. To win an argument, a partner must compromise and sacrifice, after deliberations to look at the issues from a mutual point of view, the problem lies when you always have disagreements with no amicable solution. Men fall prey since they feel they lose control over the feelings of the spouse making them prone to leaving the marriage or engaging in habits that are detrimental to the family like – drinking and staying out till late hours to avoid arguments. Women cannot cope up with for long, leaving the marriage becomes the next option.
5. Emotional disconnection
Naturally, women want all the attention and appreciation; it irritates them when they have to compete with someone or rather demand your attention just because you are “busy”. They value family time, when it misses in the marriage union, it is bound to fail. Men, on the other hand, require the freedom and ability to have full control over their wives. If there is poor communication between spouses on the expectations then they willingly ask for a separation.
Leaving a marriage with clear set rules with an aim of allowing your spouse to soul search in the direction of the marriage is healthy. The complexity of the issues leading to separation determines the length of separation or divorce. As you opt to leave a marriage, go with an open mind to either restore the marriage or completely lose it because if your partner does not feel it was worthwhile then he will move on.