20 Eye-Opening Signs He Pretends to Love You

When we are in a relationship, we try our best to make it last a lifetime. In the end, we all seek love. The permanent kind of love. We all want our current relationship to be our “forever.”

One of the saddest realities of life is when you break up with the person you love, but did you know there is something worse than this?

It’s staying in a relationship where your partner only pretends to love you.

Can you imagine being in a relationship, and you start to realize that your partner is showing signs he pretends to love you?

20 eye-opening signs he pretends to love you

There can be many signs to watch out for, and deep inside, you already have a gut feeling that the person you love may not feel the same way.

So, here are 20 eye-opening signs he’s faking his love for you. 

1. He doesn’t consider you as a priority

Do you find yourself making all the efforts to contact him, make plans to go on dates, and even ask him to spend time with you?

Does your boyfriend make excuses about his work, his busy lifestyle, and his plans for the future, and ask you to understand why he can’t make time for you?  

This only means that he has other priorities.

Related Reading: Relationship Problem: Not Making Your Relationship a Priority

2. He wants a secret relationship

Does your boyfriend ask you to keep your relationship private? Does he ask you not to post anything about your relationship on social media? 

This may mean that your boyfriend might not be ready for a commitment, or he is not yet sure about you. Worse, he is hiding something from you.

3. Too much PDA

Do you notice that your boyfriend only shows you his affection when you are in public? Does he change his attitude when you’re alone with him?

If he starts ignoring you when you are all alone and would only be sweet and affectionate when you’re in public, then this is one of the signs he pretends to love you.

4. You don’t know your place in his life

Do you have this gut feeling that you don’t even know your place in his life?

You start to feel that you don’t belong in any of his future plans. Your boyfriend doesn’t make any effort to value your opinion and feelings in your relationship.

Related Reading: Appreciating And Valuing Your Spouse

5. He doesn’t think of you in his spare time

Do you find yourself waiting for your boyfriend to contact you? Do you always text or call him first?

Does your boyfriend often ask you to understand him whenever you ask him to communicate with you? If you have to wait for your turn because he’s too busy with other things, then it only means that you are not on his top priority list.

6. He doesn’t want to talk about your future together

Faking love in a relationship will gradually show. Does your boyfriend feel uncomfortable when you try to discuss topics about your future together? Does he try to avoid the subject or divert it?

Ultimately, he’ll try to avoid the subject or tell you not to plan ahead so you won’t get disappointed.

7. He respects you and your opinion

A pretending love will not last because it doesn’t have the foundation of respect.

If your boyfriend fails to respect you and your opinions, then it’s one of the signs he pretends to love you. You will notice how he would pretend to listen but fail to value your inputs and suggestions. You will also feel like you are not being respected in your relationship.

Also Try: Does My Husband Respect Me Quiz

8. Physical intimacy is more important for him

If you are just pretending to love someone, it can show if you’re just focused on being physically intimate.

Does your boyfriend only show his sweet side when he wants physical intimacy? Other than that, he may seem distant and uninterested in you.

If this is the case, then he’s faking the relationship.

9. He avoids communication

One of the more obvious signs he pretends to love you is when he avoids communication.

So, if you start seeing that your boyfriend lacks interest when he’s talking to you or only pretends to listen, then you need to face the truth. Also, when your boyfriend doesn’t even ask you questions or engage in discussion with you, then it only means one thing- he’s not sincere in your relationship.

10. He is only interested if he can get something

One of the most hurtful ways to know that he never loved you when you are together is when he’s only affectionate when he needs something from you.

Yes, this is a common trait of someone who only pretends that he’s in love.

May it be sex, money, connection, or even attention – he only shows you that he loves you when he needs these things.

He later becomes unavailable or distant once he gets what he needs.

Related Reading: 20 Signs of a Selfish Husband and How to Deal With Him

Check out this video where Kev Hick describes how to handle dating a damaged man and why it is not necessary for you to mother him:

11. Your family and friends don’t approve of your relationship

If you notice that your family and friends disapprove of your current boyfriend, maybe it’s time to listen to them. They know when you’re head over heels in love again and if you are being irrational over your decisions.

While there are a few instances that people may do this for their own selfish reasons, the majority of the people closest to you just want you to realize what’s happening.

12. He hides things from you

One way or another, you will know if a guy is hiding something from you.

Did he purchase a new property without you knowing? Did he resign from his work and didn’t bother telling you? Did he meet up with his ex to have coffee and didn’t bother thinking about what you’d feel?

May it be a small secret or a big one- deliberately lying to you means he doesn’t trust you or doesn’t want you to know what he’s doing.

Related Reading: 11 Tips for Letting Go of a Toxic Relationship

13. He doesn’t want you to meet his friends and family

Does your boyfriend make sudden excuses when you ask about meeting his friends or family?

Does he come up with reasons that it’s not yet the right time, or he would rather have a private relationship with you?

This can only mean that he’s already showing signs he pretends to love you and is not interested in moving forward with you.

14. He’s always unavailable

Being in a relationship is having someone to depend on, but what if your boyfriend is never there when you need him?

He’s never available and would always have excuses whenever you need him – even if it’s an emergency.

Related Reading: 20 Signs You’re in a “Fake Relationship”

15. It’s always your fault

Misunderstandings in a relationship are common. It can also help you grow together, but what if you’re the only one to blame for everything?

Your boyfriend never admits mistakes and would rather debate over who’s at fault instead of saying sorry?

This is a sign of being manipulative and a person who is prone to gaslight.

16. He doesn’t want to grow with you

A person who loves you will challenge you to grow and be a better person.

If your boyfriend never encourages you or corrects you, you need to think twice about him.

A man who doesn’t care about you or your personal growth isn’t sincere with his feelings for you.

17. He avoids “difficult” questions

Does your boyfriend become irritated when you try to talk about your issues as a couple? Does he avoid having deep conversations with you?

Men who only pretend to love you will avoid difficult questions that put them on the hot seat.

He won’t walk about commitment, meeting family and friends, moving forward in your relationship, and being emotionally intimate with you.

Related Reading: Emotional Intimacy In Marriage

18. Forgets special dates and occasions

Sometimes, missing important occasions or dates is normal, but if your boyfriend never remembers even a single one of them, then think this over.

No matter how busy you are, you can find ways to remember important events or dates. However, if your boyfriend never shows that he’s sorry and just shrugs you off, then it means he doesn’t care about how upset you are.

19. He seems bored when he’s with you

When you are in love, you can’t wait to spend time with your partner.

What if you start noticing your boyfriend being distant, irritated, and even bored when you’re together? Would he rather play mobile games than spend quality time with you?

It’s one of the most painful realizations that we need to face.

Related Reading: 11 Ways to Have Quality Time With Your Partner

20. He cheats on you

Don’t ask yourself, “Why did he pretend to love me if he would just cheat on me? 

You don’t even need to look for other signs he pretends to love you if he already cheated on you. This is the last straw and the most obvious one that you need to let go of this person.

Conclusion

Being in love is a beautiful feeling. It makes you motivated, blooming, and of course, happy.

But remember this; your happiness doesn’t depend on another person.

So, in any event, if you already see signs he pretends to love you, then maybe it’s time to reassess your decision of loving him.

Don’t settle for a person who doesn’t see your value. Don’t allow a man who doesn’t respect you or see how beautiful and special you are to have a place in your life.

If you are in this situation, just remember that you deserve better.