It can be frustrating when you come to feel, “My husband thinks he does nothing wrong.”
Being in a relationship with someone who is never wrong can lead you to feel as if you cannot express your feelings, and you may even perceive that you don’t matter in the relationship.
Learn how to identify the signs that your husband thinks he does nothing wrong, as well as ways you can cope when a husband says he can’t do anything wrong.
Why does a person think he can do nothing wrong?
It may come as no surprise that research also shows that perfectionism is linked to lower relationship satisfaction. If you are struggling with the thought that my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, there is no wonder that you may be looking for solutions.
There are reasons behind the never wrong personality in relationships.
In some cases, when you notice my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, he might also be a bit of a perfectionist. This means he expects himself to be perfect and is highly self-critical.
Someone who is a perfectionist may struggle with a never wrong personalitybecause being wrong would suggest they are no longer perfect. When someone’s entire self-esteem is based upon perfectionism, being wrong can be a threat to their identity.
Perhaps the main reason behind my husband thinks he does nothing wrong is the need to defend himself. Quite simply, the need to be right at all times is a defense mechanism. If your husband says he can’t do anything wrong, he is defending against his own vulnerabilities and imperfections.
Ultimately, if you feel my husband acts like he thinks he knows everything, he may not even be aware of this.
He may be subconsciously trying to cover up his own insecurities, shame, or unpleasant emotions by trying to be right all the time.
Underlying the never-wrong personality is low self-esteem and the fear that he will be seen as weak or inherently flawed if he admits to being wrong.
Keep in mind that in order for someone to become so opposed to the idea of never being wrong, they have probably experienced some sort of intense pain or rejection in the past.
Perhaps they were punished for sharing emotions as a child, or maybe their parents expected perfection and withheld love in its absence.
Whatever the case, know that if you catch yourself thinking, “What is wrong with my husband?” chances are that he developed the defense mechanism of never being wrong at a rather young age in order to protect himself because he learned that being vulnerable would result in criticism or punishment.
5 Factors that may lead to a never-wrong personality
As previously mentioned, childhood rejection can lead to insecurities that make a person feel they can never be wrong. Some other factors that can lead to the never wrong personality are as follows:
Learning from growing up with a parent who always had to be right
Low self-esteem arising from childhood issues
Regardless of the specific cause, there are several underlying issues that lead a person to become someone who is never wrong.
Remember, no matter what the cause is, always being right is a defense mechanism. Admitting to imperfection would mean coming face to face with insecurities, fears, or other parts of the self that are too painful to face.
15 signs of a husband who thinks he does nothing wrong
If you have noticed that your husband thinks he is always right, you may be looking for some signs that may suggest your observations are correct.
Consider the following 15 signs of a husband who is never wrong:
He blames you for everything that goes wrong
If your husband thinks he is always right, he certainly won’t be to blame when things go wrong. This means that if there is some sort of problem, he may place the blame on you because taking any fault would require him to admit to imperfection on his part.
He has to “win” arguments
If you are someone who feels my husband thinks he knows everything, you will probably notice that he always has to have the last word in arguments.
For the never wrong personality, an argument is not an opportunity to compromise or resolve conflict, but rather a time to win and show that he is right.
He projects his emotions onto you
Projection occurs when we feel a certain way and attribute that feeling to someone else because we don’t want to accept the feeling.
For instance, if your husband is anxious about work and you ask him what is wrong, he may project his anxiety onto you and ask why you are so worried all the time.
Someone who is never wrong struggles to be vulnerable enough to accept their own painful emotions so that projection may be necessary.
He gets upset when you get emotional after he hurts you
When someone has a perfectionist mindset and a need to be right all the time, it will be difficult to accept responsibility for hurting another person.
This means that if you are in a situation where my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, he will probably not want to admit that your hurt feelings are warranted. Instead, he will make you blame for having hurt feelings in the first place.
You can’t help but feel, “I do everything for my husband, and he does nothing for me.”
Someone who is never wrong may have a sense of entitlement and expect that others should simply wait on them. This can lead you to feel as if your husband takes you for granted and relies on you to do everything for him while giving little in return.
He has a really hard time apologizing
The never in the wrong husband will struggle to apologize because offering an apology means admitting to wrongdoing. If you’re someone who feels that my husband thinks he is always right, you probably don’t get a sincere apology very often, if ever.
He stops texting mid-conversation during arguments
When you’re caught in the middle of a dilemma where my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, you might notice that he stops texting during an argument. Perhaps the two of you have been going back and forth, and he suddenly disappears during the conversation.
This suggests that he has become uncomfortable with the possibility that he might have done something wrong, so he has chosen to exit the conversation rather than address the issue.
You feel that he judges you for your flaws
Remember that a never in the wrong husband typically has underlying insecurities and self-esteem issues. This means that he may be especially judgmental toward your flaws in order to avoid addressing his own imperfections.
He often corrects you
Another sign of a husband who thinks he does nothing wrong is constantly feeling like, “my husband is always correcting me.” If your husband needs to be right and feels that he always is, this will mean that he thinks you are often wrong and in need of correction.
He threatens to leave you if he isn’t getting his way
Someone who always needs to be right may threaten to end the relationship in order to manipulate you into giving him his way or conceding to him during an argument.
Someone who is never wrong will expect that they should always have their way, and they may be willing to manipulate or shame you into giving them their way.
The video below discusses how partners might use threats as a bargaining tool to bend things their way and what you can do about it:
He expects things to be done a certain way
Remember that if you’re in a situation where my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, he is probably a bit of a perfectionist. Along with this comes the expectation or belief that things should be done a certain way.
He’s rigid in his thinking
Rigid or black-and-white thinking can also come along with perfectionism and the never-wrong personality. Someone who has to always be right will be set on a certain way of thinking.
He doesn’t consider your perspective
If your husband thinks he is always right, he won’t want to consider your perspective. He is already convinced that his way of thinking is correct, so he has no motivation to consider a different viewpoint.
Acknowledging that your perspective may be valid would also threaten his own sense of security.
He becomes very angry when confronted with a mistake
People who are secure and have a healthy level of self-esteem are able to admit to mistakes and grow from them, as they see mistakes as a learning opportunity.
On the other hand, the never wrong personalityviews mistakes as a threat to their self-esteem, so they will become quite upset or display intense mood swings when confronted with a mistake they have made.
He is highly critical of you
Someone who is insecure about his own shortcomings may need to become highly critical of others in order to make himself feel better.
This means that when you are dealing with a never-in-the-wronghusband, he may criticize or demean you for making small mistakes or being imperfect.
How to deal with a husband who thinks he does nothing wrong?
So what do you do when you notice the signs that my husband thinks he does nothing wrong?
Know it’s not your fault
First of all, do not take the situation personally. You may think that your husband’s critical behavior or inability to apologize for means there is something wrong with you, but in reality, the problem begins with him.
He is coping with his own insecurities by being someone who is never wrong.
Do not tolerate abuse
While you may recognize that your husband’s need to be right is not your fault, that doesn’t mean that it is okay or that you should tolerate a marriage in which your opinion or value doesn’t matter.
Nor should you tolerate abusive behavior. If your husband’s need to be right all the time has become problematic for the relationship, you have a right to speak up and express your concerns.
When having a conversation, it can be helpful to first listen to your husband’s side of the story in order to validate his feelings. This can make him feel heard and understood, and it may lower some of his defenses.
Offer him an opportunity to explain where his need to be right coming from, and remind him that you are having this conversation not because you want to “win the argument” but rather because you want to be on the same page so the relationship can be successful.
Visit a therapist
If having a conversation is not helpful, it may be beneficial to seek a couple’s counseling so that you can address underlying issues in the relationship.
Research shows that couple’s therapy can increase people’s empathy for their partners, so it may be beneficial when you feel that my husband thinks he knows everything.
Keep yourself busy
Find some sort of activity or outlet that allows you to be free from thoughts of, “What is wrong with my husband?”
Living with a never-wrong personality can certainly come with challenges, so you may need to find your own outlets for stress. You may cope through exercise, meditation, journaling, and spending time with friends.
The realization that my husband thinks he does nothing wrong is frustrating, but there are ways to cope.
It is important to realize that this issue isn’t about you. If you are unhappy as a result of your husband’s need to always be right, have a conversation with him. Remember to take care of yourself as well.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Jenni Jacobsen is a licensed social worker with a master's degree in social work from The Ohio State University, and she is in the process of completing her dissertation for a Doctorate of Philosophy in Psychology. She has worked in the social work field for 8 years and is currently a professor at Mount Vernon Nazarene University. She writes website content about mental health, addiction, and fitness.
Licensed as both a social worker through Ohio Board of Counselors, Social Workers, and Marriage/Family Therapists and school social worker through Ohio Department of Education as well as a personal trainer through American Council on Exercise.