15 Hot Tips to Drive Her Crazy in Bed & Strengthen Your Bond

Intimacy isn’t just about what happens under the sheets; it’s about the connection that lingers long after. When you’re fully present, tuned in to her energy, something shifts; it’s no longer just passion, it’s partnership.

The soft laughter between kisses, the way she looks at you when she feels truly seen… those are the moments that turn closeness into something unforgettable. Every touch becomes a conversation, every breath a promise. It’s not about perfection, it’s about awareness, effort, and care.

These little gestures, both tender and thrilling, can turn ordinary nights into something deeply personal and honest. And sometimes, the smallest tips to drive her crazy in bed can be the ones that bring you closer than ever.

What does it mean to drive her crazy in bed?

To drive her crazy in bed isn’t just about passion or technique; it’s about connection. It’s knowing how to make her feel desired, safe, and understood all at once. When you take your time, listen to her body, and show genuine curiosity, everything changes.

It’s the look in her eyes, the rhythm of trust, the comfort of being fully seen. Great intimacy isn’t about performing—it’s about presence. Whether it’s slow, playful, or intense, sex with your wife or partner becomes something more meaningful… something that deepens the bond long after the lights go out.

15 tips to drive her crazy in bed & strengthen relationships

Let’s face it. You shouldn’t need a degree to get down and dirty with your partner. Knowing how to drive her crazy in bed can be an enthralling experience for you.

So here are 15 hot sex tips for men to use to drive a woman crazy in bed!

1. The classic touch is everything

Classic approaches involve taking time to explore her body rather than rushing to intimate areas without care or understanding. That might work for men, but it may not work out too well for your partner. There is no shortcut to driving a woman wild with desire.

Women need to get in the mood for intimate sex, and the best way to do so, as often recommended, is to touch all of her body.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Start slow with gentle, teasing touches that build anticipation.
• Use your fingertips, lips, and hands to explore without rushing.
• Pay attention to her reactions—let them guide your pace and rhythm.

2. Massage her

If you are not good at foreplay, you might want to opt for a massage to drive your wife or partner crazy in bed.  Learn to perform a thoughtful, sensual massage before exploring more intimate areas.

You might discover the ‘on’ switch, along with additional sex tips that go hand in hand with an erotic massage. Do it with the heart rather than out of obligation, and you’ll make her wild for you. Remember, a woman will know the difference!

Here’s how to approach this:

• Use scented oils and warm your hands before touching her.
• Focus on slow, rhythmic motions that release tension.
• End the massage with light teasing touches that transition naturally into intimacy.

3. Surprise her with spontaneity

Routine can sometimes make things predictable. Add an element of surprise by initiating intimacy at unexpected times or in new locations. Whether it’s a playful moment in the kitchen or an impromptu getaway, the thrill of the unexpected will leave her wanting more.

Surprises awaken curiosity and anticipation, making each encounter feel fresh and exciting. They show that you still want to impress her, keeping the chemistry alive.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Initiate a kiss or gentle touch when she least expects it.
• Change the setting—try a new room or even take a weekend trip.
• Keep it playful; small surprises can build lasting excitement.

4. The value scale

Some women may prefer a firmer touch, so discussing preferences with your partner can help create a more satisfying experience.

That doesn’t mean going in with the force of your strength, but asking her if she wants a firmer touch will help you determine the level of effort or degree of pressure she needs to feel satisfied.

It’s a tip that your wife might appreciate very much, and it will also help drive your wife crazy in bed.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Ask her directly what pressure feels best and adjust accordingly.
• Observe her body language—tense means too much, relaxed means right.
• Alternate between soft and firm touches to keep sensations dynamic.

5. Communicate about what feels good

It’s important to open up the communication about sex and intimacy. It will also promote discussion about how you like things, which can commonly be a challenge for many couples.

You get to relax a little bit more knowing that you don’t have to concentrate on delicate touch, your partner gets to enjoy your touch, and you both get to open the floor to communicate more about what you like and dislike in the sack.

Kristen K. Scarlett, LMHC, says

Couples who engage in frequent and open communication about their sexual desires, needs, and fantasies report having the most satisfying and steamy sex life. As an added bonus, talking about sex is fun and good foreplay!

Learning about her desires will help you get strong in your game, and your thoughtfulness will amp up her sexual feelings for you.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Start the conversation outside the bedroom in a relaxed setting.
• Use positive language—say what you love instead of what you dislike.
• Listen actively, and show appreciation for her honesty and vulnerability.

6. Experiment with temperature play

Introduce a playful contrast of temperatures to heighten her sensations. For example, use warm massage oil or gently tease her with an ice cube. The alternating temperatures stimulate nerve endings and make her body more sensitive, enhancing her pleasure.

It’s a simple yet exciting way to awaken her senses and explore new layers of connection. Always move slowly, watch her reactions, and let curiosity guide the moment.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Keep the temperature shifts subtle; extremes can feel uncomfortable.
• Use a warm towel or a chilled ice cube to trace along her skin.
• Combine temperature play with kisses or whispers for a deeper impact.

7. Kiss and kiss again

Don’t reserve your kisses for only when you are in the midst of intercourse. Begin your foreplay with a kiss, and return to her mouth over and over again during your bedroom antics.  

Your mouths are supreme erogenous zones built for pleasure. Kiss lightly. Kiss deeply. Nibble on her lips. Brush them slowly, then take her mouth with a gentle but firm pressure.  

All of this will excite her and will be enough to make your woman go mad in bed. It will leave her thinking you really have some expert bedroom skills.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Start slow; let the anticipation build before deepening the kiss.
• Explore different styles—soft, teasing, passionate, or lingering.
• Use your hands to cradle her face or trace her body while kissing.

8. Concentrate on where her pleasure lies

Women’s anatomy down there is clearly not as evident as men’s. Where you are convex, she is concave. The center of her pleasure, the clitoris, can be tricky to find sometimes, depending on how she is built.

Clitoral size and sensitivity can vary, so it’s essential to pay attention to her responses and preferences. So the best way to find her clitoris is with your ears. That’s right. Listen to her breathing, her moaning, and her signs of contentment as you caress her.  

If she’s the quiet type, ask her if doing this or that feels good. Still not sure? Ask her to take your hand and guide you to what feels best for her.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Let her guide you—communication creates trust and comfort.
• Go slow and use steady, gentle movements.
• Pay attention to nonverbal cues; they tell you more than words.

9. Share your fantasies

Use the power of the imagination to compose your fantasies. As you have that romantic date, surprise each other with your fantasies. 

Share your thoughts and choose what you can do immediately, as you postpone others that you think will be fun later. Of course, you will dismiss the other non-impactful ones.

Role-playing can boost confidence and add an element of fun and novelty to your intimate moments. It can also unimaginably turn your girlfriend on and make your girlfriend go crazy in bed.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Bring it up playfully during a relaxed moment.
• Start with lighter fantasies before exploring deeper ones.
• Always set boundaries and ensure mutual consent before trying anything new.

10. Talk dirty

Do you know that dirty talk can be a turn-on for women? If you don’t know this already, then you certainly need to read more tips on how to drive her crazy in bed.

Explore the art of intimate communication by discussing the type of language that excites and feels comfortable for both of you. Ask open questions to allow her to express her feelings. Tell her things that you know will increase the stimulation and arouse her.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Keep your tone low and genuine; forced words can feel awkward.
• Mix compliments with sensual suggestions to build heat.
• Respect her comfort level—check in to ensure it turns her on, not off.

11. Extend the after-play

Intimacy doesn’t have to end immediately after the climax. Spend extra time cuddling, kissing, or simply talking. This post-intimacy connection makes her feel cherished and loved, deepening the emotional and physical bond between you both.

Those quiet moments after pleasure are where true closeness grows. Let her feel your warmth, your care, and the softness that follows desire.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Hold her close and breathe together for a few minutes.
• Whisper something gentle or appreciative to make her smile.
• Avoid distractions; stay focused on her and the shared calm.

12. Multiple moves 

You can do wonders if you can multitask during sex. Your hands are working on one erogenous zone, your mouth is working on the other, and your tool is doing the main action. 

Mastering multiple forms of stimulation can enhance intimacy and create a deeply satisfying experience for both partners. Multiple stimulations can drive a woman wild in bed, and before you know it, she will be asking for more.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Alternate between touches, kisses, and movement to build rhythm.
• Stay attentive—don’t rush or overwhelm her senses.
• Adjust based on her reactions to keep her engaged and relaxed.

13. Focus only on her pleasure 

If you want to know tips to drive her crazy in bed, the one thing you must learn is to be more giving than receiving. Concentrate on making her feel passionate, rather than looking for an easy out. 

Take your time with her body and make it all about her pleasure. She will definitely return back the favor with more intensity, and all that attention to her body will make her feel desired. This is one of the most important things that drives girls crazy.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Prioritize her needs before your own.
• Ask her what she wants and listen without ego.
• Celebrate her pleasure—her satisfaction fuels the connection.

Watch this TED Talk where Niveen Rizkalla shares how empathy, self-awareness, and genuine connection can help us build deeper intimacy and stronger relationships:

14. Create a sensory experience

Set the stage for a multi-sensory experience. Light scented candles, play sensual music, and use silk sheets or feathers to tease her skin. Engaging all her senses will create a more immersive and memorable intimate experience.

When every sense is awakened, the body responds with deeper passion and emotion. The right atmosphere turns an ordinary moment into something unforgettable and deeply romantic.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Choose scents and sounds that relax and arouse simultaneously.
• Dim the lights or use candles for a warm, soft glow.
• Add textures such as silk, feathers, or warm oils to stimulate her skin.

15. Try a blindfold

Using a blindfold can heighten your partner’s other senses, making every touch feel more intense and stimulating. When she doesn’t have her sight, she will feel your touch more deeply.

It will heighten her sense of touch and make her body more sensitive. You can easily tease her or blow her mind with your amazing oral skills. It is enough to make a girl go crazy in bed.

Here’s how to approach this:

• Use a soft, comfortable fabric that feels gentle on her skin.
• Start with light touches and kisses to build anticipation.
• Always check that she feels safe and comfortable before continuing.

Keeping the spark alive

True intimacy isn’t just about pleasure; it’s about presence, trust, and connection. When you slow down, listen, and explore what makes her feel truly desired, you build something deeper than passion—you build closeness. These moments of vulnerability and curiosity remind you both that love is more than a routine.

It’s laughter, warmth, and learning each other over and over again. The right tips to drive her crazy in bed aren’t just about physical sparks; they’re about keeping the emotional flame burning long after the lights go out.

Marriage.com Assessment

Relationship Test: What Help Does Your Relationship Need Most Right Now?

If your relationship feels off balance, if communication feels harder, connection weaker, or tension more frequent, this assessment can help you understand what’s happening beneath the surface. Grounded in relationship psychology and evidence-...

Questions: 20 | Last updated: Nov 18, 2025

Sample Question

When you and your partner talk about something important…

We listen with care — even hard talks feel safe and productive

We try to talk, but lately emotional closeness feels harder to reach

I want to be open, but part of me still guards my heart

Our discussions sometimes spiral or end unresolved

It’s hard to feel close because our physical intimacy hasn’t felt strong lately

We often see things differently about goals or priorities

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Expert Q&A

I'm older but still sexually active. My partner, who's ten years younger, reacts negatively to any talk about sex. What should I do?

Jennifer Jacobsen Schulz

Licensed Clinical Social Worker

Expert Answer

Have a conversation about your partner about how this makes you feel. There may be an underlying issue related to the lack of sex. It's important for couples to communicate about these matters.

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Sylvia Smith Author

Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle... Read more in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action. Read less