Marriage.com got in touch with relationship experts, couples’ counselors, Family Psychotherapists to understand their views on how to have the best relationship and have some best relationship advice.
Here, we have a few successful relationship tips and best relationship advice you can take to keep your romantic partnership in good working order. Here are some healthy relationship tips and advice on love and relationships you must adhere to-
1. Figure out your common interests
It is okay if your partner is much more interested in watching football than you, and you have a keen interest in watching Hollywood movies than your partner.
You shouldn’t worry if the thing you find most boring is what gets him going. But there will be a thing you and your partner enjoy doing together; that is your common interest.
If common interests aren’t present, happy couples develop them. Understand what you are looking for in a relationship and work to achieve that goal.
Be sure to develop something you and your partner enjoy doing and at the same time. Be sure to cultivate interests of your own. This will make you more interesting and prevent you from appearing too dependent.
Here’s the best relationship advice ever that Kateri has to offer in terms of relationship needs:
Two great questions to ask oneself about one’s relationship are the following:
What do I need in a relationship?
What do I want in a relationship?
Needs are non-negotiables required to feel safe, accepted, and loved by one’s partner. An example of a need is for a partner to be a good listener and to take time to hear and understand what you communicate.
Wants are not necessary to make a relationship work, but they can make it easier, deeper, and more fun. An example of want could be sharing a specific interest.
2. Say “I love you” and “have a good day” every morning
Complimenting each other and sharing pleasantries are among the best ways to thank a special someone for the effort they have taken for you, for being there for you, and most of all for loving you.
One of the best relationship advice would be to ensuresaying I love you every morning as a way to make her feel happy and glad to see the brightness of another day.
Telling her, I love you every morning, reminds her that you are grateful for her being there for you. It’s a great way to buy some patience and tolerance as each partner sets out each day to get their things done.
In this context, Marie Mercado has two important tips for a healthy relationship
1) Ask at least once a day: How can I help you right now?
2) For every negative interaction/statement, MAKE SURE you make 5 positive interactions/statements.
3. Express your love physically
Intensify the affection and love you have for each other in a relationship by showing it physically. It might be through hugs. It is a known fact that hugs strengthen the love partners have for each other.
Always hold hands. Whenever you’re out together, make sure you are fully synchronized by holding one another’s hand. It is a public indicator of love and affection.
Marriage cannot be based on a high of emotional attraction which cannot be maintained. It is a partnership, and a contract between two people to raise a family and support each other.
Feelings of love and compatibility are wonderful to experience between two people, but it must be accompanied by the awareness that things change with time and that you have a responsibility to the children you have brought into this world.
When you can trust your partner, you have this strong feeling that they will always tell you the plain truth. You know they care about you and you know that they will always be there for you.
You will not have to worry about manipulation, unfaithfulness, deceit, or betrayal. Ultimately, you can relax when you can trust and rely on your partner. A relationship has to feel safe for both partners where issues are resolved patiently without the need for chaos.
So, follow this advice on relationships and try tobuild more trust amongst each other.
David Wyner shares relationships tips for couples about talking openly and building trust:
Talk: Each partner has to be able to talk openly about issues. This means that there has to be an atmosphere of safety in the discussion. Setting a safe space is often the single starting point for discussion and is best done with a neutral, trained professional.
Listen: This means allowing partners to fully expose conflicts without defensive interruption (for example, “you do the same thing”) or fear of retaliation. Listening is not the same thing as remembering what was said.
Rather it requires trying to place oneself into a partner’s experience. Listening requires reflection.
5. Always learn to forgive and forget
Don’t keep a scoreboard. Whenever your partner accepts, they are wrong and apologize,forgive them and let it go.
Good couples make time to check in with one another regularly. It is essential to talk about things that you deem fit to be discussed.
Try to spend a few minutes discussing more profound or more personal subjects to stay connected to your partner over the long term.
In case your partner is not around you, always keep in touch with him or her. This might be through the use of social media like Whatsapp, Facebook, Twitter, etc. and other electronic media like faxes and emails.
Here, Dr. Dulcinea Pitagora discusses the need for compassionate communication in the relationship. He shares the best relationship advice on setting boundaries through communication.
Communicate with compassion: This includes active listening—i.e., making sure you understand your partner by reflecting back what you hear—and asking for clarification instead of making assumptions, even about things you think are obvious.
Set clear boundaries:Use compassionate communication to tell your partner what you need and ask them for what they need before one of you becomes frustrated that you aren’t getting enough alone time enough affection and intimacy, enough collaboration—whatever your individual and collective needs are.
We also have relationship expert advice from Caroline Johnston who has offered tips for a romantic relationship based on experiences with clients:
When couples enter my office, they are usually in crisis and have forgotten how to communicate. The remedy is for each person to hear the other, without defensiveness.
For instance, if your partner says, You aren’t listening the other could say What am I not hearing?.
Or if one says, You don’t love me anymore the other could say What do I do that makes you feel unloved?
After they have clarified, then repeat what you hear and truthfully respond to what they say.
Everyone wants to be heard, and once we hear each other the anger of the conflict often dissipates. As the anger subsides, we can reconnect and share love and tenderness that the relationship deeply needs.
Here’s what Dr. Tony Ortega has to say about establishing a line of communication in the relationship:
Have hard conversations: Many times I see couples having problems because they are too scared to have hard conversations. They would rather feel a steady stream of discomfort rather than a potential output of discomfort. While certain themes are uncomfortable to face, it could lead to a stronger connection with your partner.
Not having these conversations can lead to bigger and more intense fights in the future as you have all of these bottled up emotions that have been ignored or pushed to the side.
Be mindful: Along the lines of communicating with your partner, we have to be very mindful to communicate our needs and expectations to our partners. Sure, it would be great that your partner may intuitively know something that you would want but we live in a very fast-paced world and things easily slip from conscious attention.
Nudge your partner if you have to but don’t stew in silence waiting for something to happen out of thin air.
7. Respect Space
Setting some alone time for yourself or letting your partner do the same is healthy for a relationship. Also, it is absolutely normal to create boundaries where both of you enjoy some time with yourself.
Most couples might assume space as a sign of them breaking apart. However, it is important for couples to remember that this saves them from breaking apart. It lessens conflict.
In this context, David Tzall provides two tips on healthy relationships:
Take a break before an argument gets out of hand. Both partners should take space to gather their thoughts and emotions so they don’t act impulsively and regret their actions.
Be okay with being alone. It’s important to learn how to be comfortable by yourself as much as it is to discover how to function in a relationship.
7. Be funny
Make sure you have fun in the relationship. Break from the norm of seriousness and tension caused by work by being playful with each other, going to the movies together, going on picnics, etc.
Humour in relationships is often overlooked, but it is needed to take a break from the work and seriousness of everyday life. When you are playful or funny with your partner, you are taking that break together.
The video below discusses the importance of humor in the relationship where Actor Yakov Smirnoff says that “laughter is a confirmation of a happy relationship”.
Follow these pieces of relationship advice and tips for a perfect relationship, and you will see a stark positive improvement in your relationship with your partner.
However, if even after following these relationship tips, you are not able to achieve happiness and satisfaction in your marriage, don’t think twice and seek relationship advice for couples from relationship experts.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.