Many of us spout out these words as effortlessly as anything else you might say in life. Most of us claim unconditional love when we have truly no idea what it means. Below is a story about how one precious, 10-year-old little girl, has opened David’s heart in ways even he didn’t think were possible.
“As I get older, I’m 61 right now, I have found this incredible space inside myself when I share with the world areas of life where I’ve been 100% dead wrong.
Isn’t that interesting? That the more books that I write, I realize the thoughts and teachings that I used to profess years ago. I now apologize and say “ I am so sorry for leading you down a path that was incorrect.” Unconditional love is one of those topics where I am now making amends about.
Of course, I’ve never made these mistakes on purpose. Most of the areas of life that I’ve talked about shared about as an inspirational speaker and author, I was doing it by being a parrot. I was simply repeating what my teachers and gurus said was true, or by reading number one best-selling books and thinking that the author must be accurate because after all, they’ve sold over 1 million books.
Now comes a period of my life where I am brutally open, honest, and willing to call myself out in areas of life where I have been incorrect. And what has this got to do with unconditional love and a 10-year-old little precious girl? For years I used to teach workshops on “divine love, divine union, and unconditional love.“
As a former pastor, and all faith minister, I would travel all around the country doing these workshops and talking about the power of unconditional love. But it was always related to relationships between adults.
I never even considered, that I could be taught about unconditional love by a 10-year-old little girl. But it’s true. It happened. And it still happening today.
Instead of being taught by an elder, a guru, a best-selling author, my heart has been ripped wide open in the most glorious of ways by this little girl who had no intention whatsoever when we first connected, of giving me such an amazing gift.
Three years ago, when she was 10, one of my best friends Denise Link introduced me to this girl, who is filled with vibrancy and life. Denise had told me that at 10 years of age this girl was going around the neighborhood collecting books for the homeless. I said what? A 10-year-old girl collecting books from the homeless? Who gave her the idea? Was it her parents?
What I was about to find out next is the beginning of this incredible love story with this young girl. Now a teenager, 13 years old, and she is still my teacher.
At that time I was hosting a nationally syndicated radio show and booked her to be on the show. I also brought on the show her younger sister, because she had talked her younger sister into joining her on these trips around the neighborhood collecting books. As I talked to this little girl, 10 years of age at the time on my radio show, I was blown away. She was serious. She had so much compassion in her heart. So much love. And she wasn’t sitting around playing damn video games.No she was out collecting books for the homeless. After that interview, which blew me away, I told my friend, Denise, I wanted to stay in contact with this little girl.
What I found out next, had proven my intuition right. This little girl, for no reason of her own, had never met her father. At 13 years of age now, she still has never met her father, and she may never meet him, or if she does it might be years down the road.
When I heard this part of the puzzle, this part of her life, I was drawn to her even more deeply.In my work as a minister, counselor and life coach I know the importance of young girls having male role models in their lives.
I’ve dated women in the past with young children, and I could see how crucial it was for all of them to have a positive male role model in their lives. Guiding them, congratulating them, building them up and helping them when they fell. And I loved every second doing this. But, I’ve never had children of my own. And here is this precious, outrageously intelligent and talented little girl that had no male role model. I volunteered, and just possibly, it is the most amazing move I’ve ever made in my life, in order to teach me, the teacher, in order to teach me more about unconditional love.
For the last three years we have texted weekly, we FaceTime teach other, I’ve been in her corner in every way possible. We have talked about her future, what college she’s going to go to, how she’s going to be one of the top actresses of all time, as well as maybe a doctor and an attorney and who knows what else. And every week when we talk I tell her the same thing, I am in your corner, I believe in you, and I love you as if you were my own daughter.
There is not a day that goes by that I’m not in close contact with my friend Denise, texting her, asking her how my little angel is doing in school, in her plays, with her mom, with her sister. With her classmates, I found myself devoting so much of my prayer time, and my physical time to following this little girl‘s life and being in her corner.
She brings such deep emotion to the surface…..as my business coach Marleen said, “David this is your new WHY – .this is the reason, the purpose, maybe the biggest, for your existence.” I’m 100% present with her on the phone, in our texts, every day I cry tears of joy with her, for her.
My work is incredibly demanding, more often than not six days a week for the past 38 years, I’ve been devoted to my work. But don’t feel sorry for me it’s my choice. I love it. This is my passion. The only time I ever travel, and my family will back the statement, it’s for work. My schedule is so engaged and so overwhelming at times with helping as many people as I can on a daily basis who are in crisis, that I don’t really think about traveling for anything else other than helping others.
And when I found out that this precious angel, was going to be in her first major play, in one of the biggest stages in her city, where many famous actors and actresses had started out their trade. I immediately made reservations to be there and to see her perform on the very last day of the play. Because she lives across the country, it took a lot of planning, changing so many of my clients’ schedules around, to create the space to make this happen.
And yet all along it was effortless, my love for her, and the love she has given me back in return is so profound, so unconditional, that it didn’t matter what I had to go through to make it happen… I was damned and determined to be there for her and the last day of her play.
It’s funny because since the play went on for five straight weeks, in the very beginning she had asked Denise, her aunt, “was it possible in any way at all for her “David David”, that’s the name she gave me, to make it out west to see her on stage?” I had sworn Denise to secrecy, that no matter how tempted she was, never to tell this little girl I was going to be there for her, I wanted it to be a huge surprise.
And it was. I told Denise to tell this precious angel that she had to go to the airport with her in order to pick up a package for her boss, and as I came into the airport, walking down the escalator where they were ahead of me, Denise and my little angel.
I was so excited tears were streaming down my face. I walked up to them both and said: “excuse me ladies is this the city that I’m supposed to be in?“ They both turned around, Denise had the biggest smile on her face, and my little angels face turned from absolute shock to this incredibly beautiful scream and she ran to me.
As I wrapped her in my arms, I kept telling her over and over, how I loved her so much, and I would never miss something so important like this play for her. From 10 years of age until 13 years of age this little girl has taught me more about unconditional love, self-sacrifice, and commitment than anyone else ever has in my life.
In a few weeks, I’m going back to the pulpit, to begin giving sermons again for churches who are looking for ministers, or whose minister is on vacation.The title of my next sermon is “Spiritual rejuvenation“, and you can bet that this story is going to be about how this little girl, has brought me to this incredible spiritual rejuvenation called unconditional love.
I will be there for her, for the rest of her life. I will be there for her, at a moments notice, because she deserves that. Actually, she deserves more, but I will give her everything I have from now until the day I pass. As you read this, I hope it will shatter the illusion that unconditional love, the kind that we talk about as adults, is this searching for some perfect adult soulmate, when in reality, maybe the greatest form of unconditional love you and I could ever experience would have to do with a child in need.
In my new book ” Focus! Slay your goals, the proven guide to huge success, a powerful attitude and profound love”, I devote an entire chapter to “profound love.” And in this chapter, I state that unconditional love is more frequently seen between a parent and a child than between 2 adults.
This young girl has proven this to be truer than I could ever believe. If you’re single right now, without children, please look for organizations like “Big brothers, big sisters”, or other social organizations in your city and reach out and see how you can get engaged with children that don’t have a mom and or dad. If you’re retired, maybe your kids left home years ago, I implore you to do the same thing.
Open your heart, to unconditional love with a child in need. There are millions of kids right now starving for love, starving for affection and at the very least starting to be listened to. You have that power. You don’t have to have training, it’s already in your heart. Let it explode. My life has radically changed. My heart has exploded in the most amazing ways.
And it all began by listening to a 10-year-old little girl, who needed nothing more, than a male role model who was willing to listen, hold her hand both spiritually and physically, and let her know she’s important. She’s loved. She’s beautiful both inside and out.
You and I have the time to do this every day. Please, don’t let this article go in one ear and out the other, decide to act today. I guarantee, it will open your heart, tears may stream like mine still do weekly for her, positive tears, and you will know you are fully alive.