Importance of Marital Vows: Why You Should Renew Your Oaths
Marriage oaths are a fundamental part of every marital relationship. Common law partners may not have sworn the marital oath before many people and they may not even be aware of its importance. However, every time you profess and confess your love and/or your feeling to your partner or to your significant other, you are agreeing to the cardinal principles of the marriage oath.
Marriage oaths have more value than you think
Marital vows represent more than just words of affection and or affirmation. The words in themselves are a living guide that constitutes how our relationships should be. The canonical basis for a meaningful and fruitful union. I don’t know who can up with those wordings and I dare say whoever it was, left us with one of the most enduring legacies for all relationships across space and time.
I recently taught a Bible study class on building a fruitful marriage and it was only fitting to start from the marriage or in this case if you will, the relationship vows.
“Marriage is a sacred union between husband and wife and shall remain unbroken. It is the basis of a stable and loving relationship and is a joining of two hearts, bodies and souls. The husband and wife are there to support one another and provide love and care in times of joy and times of adversity. I require and charge you both that if either of you knows of any reason why you may not be joined together in holy matrimony, you may now confess it.” (Church of England)
Though anglicized, the marriage charge gives a clear blueprint for a stable relationship. Marital vows are much more meaningful than what it is commonly perceived.
“(Name), will you have this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together forever in the estate of holy matrimony? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, forsaking all others, will you keep her only unto her, for as long as you both shall live?”
When you commit to your partner, you make a lifelong commitment to stay in the relationship: through good and bad times – “for better for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish till death do us part.”
I enjoy challenging couples to take a second read on their wedding vows and reflect on it. Marital vows are much more important than you think.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Ayo Akanbi
Registered Psychotherapist
Ayo is committed to supporting and promoting the growth and healing of the whole person including spiritual, emotional, relational, vocational, behavioral, and cognitive well-being. His counseling approach is informed by family systems theory, narrative therapy, schema-focused therapy, cognitive and behavior therapy, experiential therapy, solution focus and trauma-informed studies. Ayo is a coach and mentor to many couples. With over 15 years experience as a pastor, he teaches practical theology and integrates theology and counseling psychology. He provides practical Christian based services and counselling for those clients who are comfortable with or request biblically based counselling. Ayo believes everyone can benefit from having someone to talk to, whether you just need someone to talk with as you sort through your thoughts and feelings, or you need someone to support you in working through a challenging situation.
