After all, there is no such thing as a “perfect” marriage.
You are probably more inclined to start thinking of giving up and filing for a divorce, right? It’s an easier option, and you are no longer happy but wait!
If you are taking time to contemplate divorce, have you also taken time to think about all of the signs your marriage is worth saving?
Can my marriage be saved? Is my marriage worth saving? Should I save my marriage or move on? The answer to these questions is, “Yes, your marriage can be saved.”
Your marriage can be saved, and it’s not impossible.
There have been cases of marriages that have experienced far worse than what you are experiencing, and yet, now, they are thriving.
So, if this is the case, we all want to understand, “How do you know if your marriage is worth saving?”
15 signs your marriage is worth saving
How to know if your marriage is worth saving? Before you focus on “How to save my marriage?” and the things that don’t work on your marriage, start with the thoughts and signs your marriage is worth saving, but what are these signs?
1. You’re having second thoughts
Okay, so you have decided that you want to divorce your spouse. However, why are you having thoughts in your head like, “Is my marriage worth saving?”
You’re bothered, can’t even sleep, and you are wondering if it’s the right thing to do. This must be one of the significant signs of saving a relationship.
Because if you are done, you will never have second thoughts – not even a single one.
2. It all started when you had kids
We’re not blaming the kids, but if your constant misunderstandings started when you had your little kids, you should understand.
When you become a parent, it’s normal to be tired all the time. It’s normal to be stressed and even normal to lose touch of intimacy with your spouse.
It’s not like you want to be tired and stressed out, but children require dedication and adjustments. This doesn’t mean that your relationship is gone or won’t work.
It means you just need to support each other in parenting and not focus on what is lacking.
3. You still value the sanctity of marriage
You haven’t tried flirting with another person, and you certainly stillrespect your spouse and your marriage.
Despite all the misunderstandings and being irritated with your spouse, you also feel that you are being respected by your spouse as well, then, maybe it’s time to think.
It’s possibly just stress, pressure, and trials that make you feel that you want to be out of the marriage?
4. You still want to work on your marriage
Is the relationship worth saving?
Before concluding that divorce is the answer to your question, “Is my marriage worth saving?” Have you tried talking to each other?
Have you tried talking about how you can save your marriage? If both of you are willing to work for it, then that’s it.
Don’t file for a divorce because it is one of the most significant signs your marriage is worth saving. Remember, a marriage worth fighting for is a marriage worth working hard for.
5. You can’t picture your life without your spouse
Think about Christmas, think about your birthday, oh, and even Thanksgiving.
Can you honestly picture yourself without your spouse? If you can’t, then it’s time to give your marriage another try.
In marriage, couples grow dependent on each other with the time that is not wrong as marriage is a union, and two lives are bound to get tied up. Counting on your partner is a good thing, and that is also the beauty of marriage.
6. Your problems aren’t really about your relationship
Ask yourself this, what are the things that led you to think, “Is my marriage worth saving?” and conclude that it is the best idea to file for divorce? Did you or your spouse cheat? Was there ever violence or abuse?
If your problem consists of being irritated with each other, stress, finances, not meeting your goals, something like that, then these can all be worked out.
These are just trials, and many couples, or should we say, most couples are already experiencing these problems.
7. You still love the person
Should I try to save my marriage?
Love matters, and it’s one of the most vital signs your marriage is worth fighting for.
You have to understand that your marriage will not save itself, and considering divorce is unfair to both of you and especially to your children. So, what is the next step?
8. The respect and compassion in marriage is still alive
If you often ask, “Is my marriage worth saving?” one of the most important signs that you should work on it is when you feel your partner respects you, and you respect your partner as well. Even if you both have discussed a separation, it is essential to see through the signs whether or not you both want it in your heart.
Marriages usually tend to break apart when the partners lose respect for each other, no matter the reason for divorce or separation. So, look for the sign if you both are still deciding about it.
The video below discusses how to get respect in a relationship. Further, how do you get respect in a relationship after your partner has disrespected you?
9. You both don’t mind spending time with each other
If you both stillspend time with each other or communicate often, or even if it’s a case where you both don’t mind spending time together, then the answer to your question, “Is my marriage worth saving?” is Yes.
Couples who enjoy spending time together have a strong relationship. On the other hand, if you both are contemplating separation but still happen to spend time together and don’t mind it, it means that somewhere in your heart and your partner’s, the spark is still alive.
10. You have felt the spark with your partner
No matter you both have grown apart now, making you question, “Is my marriage worth saving?” but if you both have felt the spark at one point in your relationship, this is a great and clear sign that you can again reignite the heat in the relationship with some effort.
11. You can’t share that level of comfort with anyone else
One of the signs your marriage is worth saving is when no matter how many fights you have, you can’t think of your life without your partner, and you feel you can never be that genuine with anyone else.
You feel a sense of incompleteness. When the relationship is about to end, the mind automatically prepares itself to let go of the person.
However, when your conscience knows that there’s still hope for the relationship to recover, you will feel the need to keep your partner close
12. The problems are not directly related to the relationship
Another important sign your marriage is worth saving is when there are issues between the partners, but these issues are not directly related to the relationship or the habits and behaviors of either or both the partners.
When there’s havoc because of some external factor, it is understandable that the issue in question is not either party’s fault.
13. There’s an open line of communication
Communication is one of the most important pillars of the relationship. If both the partners understand the importance of effective communication and ensure it doesn’t get affected, despite the issues, this is one of the signs your marriage is worth saving.
Partners who communicate well have fewer chances of misunderstandings.
14. There’s a 100% commitment
Infidelity is one of the common reasons for divorce. But if the spouses are fully committed to each other, the issues are bound to get solved because none of them are seeking options to leave the relationship.
Respect is another important element in the relationship. When spouses feel heard and respected, it gives them a valid reason to make efforts and save the relationship.
If you still feel respected in marriage, and there’s an equal level of respect, it is one of the signs your marriage is worth saving.
When do I start saving my marriage?
Now that you feel the need and the urge to work on your marriage, then one of the questions you want to ask is how to save a failing marriage, right? When is a relationship worth saving?
There are many options. If you don’t want to save it, there are plenty of excuses.
If you wonder, is your marriage worth saving, start by recognizing not only your partner’s faults but also your own.
From there, you will see that each of you has faults and what matters is the willingness to work together for a better marriage. You need to want to be better not just for your spouse but also for yourself as well.
Knowing the signs your marriage is worth saving is important.
Without it, one can immediately be consumed with hate and the wrong idea that divorce is always the answer – it’s not.
Also, you must focus on the positive aspects of your marriage.
Now, for yourself, your spouse, and your family – do your best.
Work together, and you can be assured that it can help your marriage. It’s never too late to realize that you made a mistake and that life is better if you have someone with you. Together with the signs that your marriage is worth saving is the hope that everything will be better and happier.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.