A person in love with an overprotective partner often finds themselves unhappy and suffocated in the relationship. More often than not, a possessive, controlling, and domineering partner doesn’t realize the trauma they are inflicting on their love interest, often forcing them to give up on the relationship.
If your bae is overtly overprotective, you must fix the issue before it impairs your relationship in the long term. But dealing with an overprotective partner does not need to be stressful.
Here are six things you can do to manage your partner’s overprotective behavior
1. Have an open conversation
Brushing the issue under the carpet or arguing about it will only make the situation worse. Talk to your partner and try to understand where the negative emotions of insecurity and jealousy are coming from. Did they have a troubled childhood? Have they faced rejection in the past? Did they have a bitter relationship experience with the ex-girlfriend having fidelity issues? These are a few factors that often force people to display overprotective behavior, sabotaging healthy relationships.
If your partner tends to micromanage you, is often suspicious of you, or is too clingy in public, in all possibilities they fear rejection and abandonment in the relationship.
Encouraging them to open up and listening to their concerns without being judgemental will help you understand your bae better, enabling you to fix the insecurities and deep-seated trust issues. For instance, if your partner thinks you are cheating on them just because their ex-partner ditched them for another person, remind them that you are a completely different individual and don’t deserve to be treated like their ex.
Find out what is working them up and address the issue accordingly. Do they show signs of insecurity when you interact with any person or a particular individual? Is the way you meet other people causing them to feel jealous? For instance, they may not have a problem with you meeting others. Your bae is plainly uncomfortable when you touch or hug them while talking. If that is the case, you can correct your behavior by being wary of your body language when you are with other people.
2. Set relationship rules to control overly jealous behavior
Though lasting relationships are full of compromises, being honest about your concerns and setting boundaries will help you curb the resentment in your love life.
Once your partner has expressed these concerns, it is time for you to clearly state the specific things that bother you about their controlling behavior. Be assertive and communicate, while dealing with an overprotective partner, that while you will strive to address their insecurities, you will in no way compromise on certain aspects of your life. For instance, you cannot cut ties with your best friends just because you are in a relationship with them.
On the other hand, you must do all in your capacity to instil trust in the relationship. For instance, it’s logical for your partner to be overprotective if you go out on a one-on-one dinner with your friend of opposite sex, without informing him. Perhaps you are used to meeting your friends on a regular basis, yet since you are in a relationship, you bae deserves to be kept in the loop.
Make a mental note of the things you are willing and unwilling to compromise on and set relationship rules to control the overprotective behavior. Once you have communicated these limits, it is up to them to change their silly behavior.
3. Don’t hesitate to express your love
In many cases, insecurity buds from the inability of one of the partners to express their love to the other. The modern lifestyle often leaves us with little time to say those three magical words that every partner wants to hear time and again.
If you love your bae, find time to call them during the day just to tell that you have been thinking about them. Simple things like dropping a message to compliment or saying that you miss being in your partner’s arms, can make your bae feel secure and remind them that you do cherish their presence in your life.
4. Introduce them to your friend circle
If your overprotective partner is worried that you may abandon them for one of your friends, introduce your partner to your gang! When they see the manner in which your friends interact with each other, your bae will get comfortable with them, leaving no room for doubt.
Involving them when you meet your friend circle will show that you have nothing to hide, leaving them no reason to be paranoid about the relationship.
5. Use reverse psychology
Giving your overprotective partner the taste of their own medicine can work wonders, helping them to loosen their overprotective grip on the relationship. Act visibly jealous when they interact with their friends. When they defend themselves, explain to them how you feel when they act jealous and insecure, enabling them to correct their silly behavior. Moreover, even if you are faking an overprotective behavior, you are assuring your partner that you find them attractive and do not want to lose them.
6. If necessary, call it quits
You do not deserve to be constantly told what to do or even ill-treated in a relationship. If after doing everything in your capacity to save the relationship, your partner refuses to change their attitude or gets abusive or violent, you must leave them pronto. Understand that not every relationship is meant to be!
It’s natural to occasionally feel jealous in a romantic relationship. However, being blatantly overprotective can weaken the relationship by allowing negative feelings of insecurity and lack of trust to seep in. If your partner is obsessively protective of you and tries to control you like a puppet, the above-mentioned tips will help you deal with his impractical behavior.