Why Do Men Like Younger Women? 10 Possible Reasons
Genes, biological drives, gender roles, societal influences, and the list goes on for what impacts our choices in life, including our relationships. The question “why do men like younger women” is equally complex.
The question should be, is this an overgeneralization? And for those men who go for younger women, what’s the difference in their motivation?
Why do men like younger women? 10 possible reasons
Why do men prefer younger women? Have a look at these possible reasons but remember that everyone is different. Moreover, as we’ll see, studies are now discounting the stereotype that men prefer younger women as too simplistic a view.
In fact, as men age, they are just as likely to partner with their age group. So, now the question is, does age matter in a relationship? Again, it’s hard to generalize, but it isn’t age alone that determines whether your worldview and values are complementary.
So, why do men like younger women? It can all boil down to how secure they feel in who they are and whether they choose a partner to fill a void or keep growing together.
1. Feel-good power
Do guys like younger girls? The centuries-old debate amongst older women, especially if they’re single. Don’t despair if you’re single and no longer in your 20s because new research on the older man, younger woman debate shows that, in reality, men still end up with women closer to them in age.
Nevertheless, those who only ever seem to be with younger girls often enjoy the rush of power. This isn’t necessarily a sordid thing, but everyone enjoys being respected and listened to, and often, younger girls are more attentive to those who seem older and wiser.
As this article on men preferring younger women narrates, older men seem more in control of life. This can put them on a pedestal in a young girl’s eyes. And who doesn’t like to be admired?
2. Childbearing attraction
Men who like younger women are often quoted as being driven by their genes. The idea is that their subconscious is driving them to find women who can bear their children.
If you’re dating a younger guy, you might wonder if he’s just after your waist-to-hip ratio. You’ll be glad to know that even our gene-driven behavior is a bit more complex.
As this study on men’s preferences for hip-to-waist ratio shows, men take in many different cues, both consciously and unconsciously, when choosing a partner.
Remember that there’s a difference between an initial attraction and a long-term relationship. So, if it’s just about the hips and nothing else, can the relationship make it for the long term?
3. Boosts self-esteem
Why do men like younger women if not to boost their feeling of self-worth? We all need a self-esteem boost at times and it’s perfectly natural to look to those closest to us to help us do that.
Nevertheless, the healthier and wiser approach is to build self-esteem from within. This can be a tough journey of self-discovery and exploration, usually with a therapist or coach.
Through this personal work, you may look for the right emotional partner rather than blindly dating a younger man or woman to make you feel good. Then again, at that point, age won’t matter.
Watch this video to learn about how our distorted thoughts often drive low self-esteem with a useful technique to overcome them:
4. Older and more powerful
Why do men prefer younger women? Often it’s quite simply because those women find them more attractive.
The stereotype has long been that women marry men like their fathers and vice versa. Interestingly, the father complex or “daddy issues” as a potential cause has been discounted by research on age-gap relationships.
Nevertheless, even when younger women partner with older men in many countries and societies, they increase their social status.
Similarly, men appreciate the respect they get, whereas their age-equivalent counterparts nowadays have usually achieved their status and power. In those cases, perhaps the question “why do men like younger women” isn’t relevant anymore.
5. Emotional maturity
Women are three times more likely to develop affective disorders, as stated in this study on gender differences in emotion regulation. Nevertheless, it is unclear whether women mature more quickly.
Yes, as explained in this study on brain development, women’s brains develop earlier, making emotional maturity a popular notion in the media. Then again, beliefs are often self-actualizing.
If men grow up believing themselves to be 10 years or so behind women in maturity, what’s to stop them from acting out?
So, do guys like younger girls to avoid commitment? Or simply because of subconscious influence from social media?
Related Read: 10 Signs of Emotional Immaturity and Ways to Deal With It
6. Eases existential dread
Psychologist Irvin Yalom lists four core human problems that we all share: fear of death, a search to be free in our lives, existential loneliness and meaninglessness.
This paper on existential isolation continues to explain that no matter how close we are to another person, we can never completely experience someone else’s experience. We all deal with that suffering in different ways.
Some people over-work, others numb themselves with various unhealthy habits and others cling to relationships. Of course, relationships can and should be a healthy way to explore who we are as human beings.
Nevertheless, why do men like younger women? In some cases, they are filling the void of existential isolation. Together they can pretend that they too are young and will live forever.
7. Midlife crisis
Similarly to existential isolation is the fear of death. No one wants to leave this world, partly because we don’t know what’s next and partly because it means the end of who we are.
So, what attracts an older man to a younger woman? The young always look carefree and invincible, and we all want to hold onto those feelings forever.
8. Seeking admiration
Why do men like younger women? It could just be because they want to feel special. We all enjoy being admired by our partners but for some of us, it’s important to be admired by everyone because of who we’re with.
The “trophy wife” stereotype is well-known, although it seems that perhaps we have selective bias, as this article on the trophy wife stereotype seems to suggest.
Then again, do women prefer older men? It’s impossible to generalize, but to some women, yes, older men already have status, power and money.
9. Playfulness
Do men prefer younger women? The common belief is yes. Nevertheless, a study in Finland on age differences in partners shows that men might state interest in younger women but actually end up with women more or less their age.
Related Read: How to Be Playful in a Relationship: 20 Effective Tips
So, why do men like younger women? Perhaps it’s just the idea of youth or could it be that younger means more playful and, therefore, naughty? And where do perception and reality meet?
10. Social pressure
Dating a younger man is also something you often see that comes with its own taboos.
Why men like younger women might have nothing to do with genes or wiring could all boil down to society paving a world for men. Although, it seems most men who aren’t in the limelight end up with partners close to their age.
What’s the answer? Why do men like younger women? It all depends on the person, background, social influences and some complex biology that even scientists can’t agree on.
FAQs
Now, the more interesting question: does age matter in a relationship? The short answer is both yes and no. Healthy relationships are built on common values and the desire to grow together.
If age drives you apart because you prioritize different things, you’ll have problems. On the other hand, you sometimes meet so-called old souls who are wise before their years. In that case, perhaps the older man, younger woman combination can work.
Do men prefer younger or older women?
Men may want younger women to make them feel good about themselves and to stave off existential loneliness. In some settings, Hollywood, for example, there’s also excessive pressure to be young and beautiful.
In those cases, older men might subconsciously hope that their partner’s youth will rub onto them. This is not proven scientifically, although we have yet to discover how our subconscious works.
Then again, older women can also be attractive in different ways. They bring wisdom and a certain groundedness that makes them attractive because they’re happy with who they are.
Again, why do men like younger women? Perhaps frustratingly, it depends.
Moreover, as stated above, the research suggests that men might say they like younger women, but most partner with their age group.
Do older men find younger women attractive?
Who doesn’t find younger women attractive? Most of the media world also promotes youthful looks, skin and body. Societal pressures are inextricably linked to the decisions we make about our partners.
Finally, we ask again why do men like younger women? For many of those men, it helps them boost their self-esteem because some younger women admire their power and status. On the flip side, women in their age group have often achieved the same things.
Conclusion
What attracts an older man to a younger woman? It could be anything from superficial reasons such as looks and body to more complex reasons. Those reasons could include societal pressure to be young or the need to exert their power in every domain.
So, finally, why do men like younger women? Are they more compliant? Or are those women attracted to power and status? Then again, the data is inconclusive and suggests that this myth is built on selective bias.
Perhaps older women can rest assured that love is mysterious. Nevertheless, healthy relationships aren’t built on looks, power and money but on the desire for personal growth and exploration.
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