Is Your Dog Ruining Your Relationship

Having a dog in might be one of the most gratifying experiences in a man’s lifetime. They greet you with excitement every time you come home, they cuddle up with you when you relax after work and they make perfect companions for your outdoor activities as well. Although they definitely require time, attention and work, once you have a dog, you can never imagine your life without him.

But what if your, or your partner’s relationship with your dog is interfering with your marriage? Is Fido affecting the time you spend with your other half? Can a dog cause a divorce? Read about the clues your pet is ruining your relationship.

Related Reading: How does Getting a Pet Affect your Relationship?

Today we’re letting you know what are all the ways your dog is ruining your relationship involuntarily –

1. Your dog sleeps with you in bed

Going to bed with your loved one is one of those moments when you can finally have some peace and quiet after a long day at work and cuddle up together. Often it is the only part of the day couples manage to fit in some intimacy time, especially those with small children.

Can pets ruin your relationship in such a scenario?

If your dog sleeps with you in bed and doesn’t let you spoon with your other half chances are your dog is ruining your relationship. While having a dog sleep beside you might be a very cute thing at first, after a while, you will realize that your dog’s sleeping habits might be creating an emotional distance between you and your partner.

2. Your dog gets all the attention

Relationships are all about giving and receiving. It is the lesson number one we all learn when entering a relationship built on trust and commitment. But has something drastically changed in your love life since the moment you or your partner got a dog?

Dogs are adorable creatures, and it is easy to become obsessed with them. We create their Instagram profiles, take photos of them, cuddle with them, give them Pet Names, talk to them, and so on. Most of these things are normal parts of having a pet, but sometimes, things can get a little out of control.

You might finally be alone with your partner, but instead of talking and finally spending some quality time with your loved one, you just can’t stop playing with your dog. If this situation sounds familiar to you, then you might be neglecting your partner because of your pet, your dog is ruining your relationship.

In this case, you need to work on finding a balance between spending quality time with your pup and being overly attached to him (not to mention that this kind of relationship could lead to other behavioral problems in dogs such as separation anxiety).

Related Reading: Can a Pet Help in Strengthening Family Bonds?

3. You don’t have some alone time with your partner

While some dogs will leave you much-needed space and time with your partner, others simply don’t accept the fact that they are not the center of attention all the time. Some dogs can even get jealous of their owner being all cuddly with their partner to such an extent that they always choose to sit between the couple. Your dog might also be following you wherever you go, making having a moment for intimacy nearly impossible.

However, if this is the case, it is not your dog’s fault. You should show your dog that you need to have some time in private by teaching him to keep himself entertained when he’s alone. Put your dog in his bed, provide him with some toys and reward him for staying in his place.

In order to have a fulfilling relationship, each couple needs to have some alone time only for them, your dog excluded. Prevent your dog from ruining your relationship.

4. Your dog is affecting your sleep quality

While the first ways a dog could be affecting your love life are rather direct, this one can affect it completely indirectly.

Your dog is ruining your relationship by affecting your sleep quality by sleeping next to you and moving a lot, or by barking during the night and interrupting your sleep. Interrupted sleep can make you feel tired in the morning, and eventually lead to sleep deprivation.

When we are sleep deprived, we experience more mood swings, feel rather cranky and sleepy all the time. Feeling excessively tired throughout the day makes us less enthusiastic in general, which inevitably leaves consequences on all our relationships, marriage included. Your dog is ruining your relationship if you are not getting adequate sleep because of it. Once you solve your sleeping problem, you will likely see all your relationships improve.

Expert Q&A

My partner inherited his late father's dog, and she has become the center of attention all the time. Everything revolves around this dog. He barely speaks to me, and it's now causing us to argue.

Anne Duvaux

Coach

Expert Answer

A big change such as getting a dog can sometimes unearth deeper issues and it's important to talk about what's going on with you with your partner. Try to also connect with the emotions you are feeling to help you understand what you are really not happy about. Does he not spend enough time with you or perhaps he doesn't return your moments of reaching out for love? It's perfectly normal to have moments when we feel distanced from our partners or maybe not as valued as before but the key to moving forwards is to talk about it. To avoid this turning into an argument though, try to avoid saying phrases such as "you do this or that" and instead use I-statements. For example, when you say hello to the dog first, I feel ignored, and I need to feel that I'm just as important as the dog, so would you consider spending more time with me/restarting date nights/ etc. Until you talk about it, you also don't know what misunderstandings and misconceptions he's carrying with him. Moreover, problem-solving together will bring you closer together, and you'll learn a bit more about each other for that deeper, long-term connection.

My wife and I agreed not to get another dog after I was attacked by ours, but she adopted a new one and has warned me to leave it alone. She even threatened me with death if I touch her new dog. What should I do?

Jennifer Jacobsen Schulz

Licensed Clinical Social Worker

Expert Answer

This sounds like a pretty serious issue. It sounds like you need to consult with a marriage counselor, or perhaps seek legal advice. Threatening one's spouse with death is a serious concern. Please reach out to local support, and consider contacting a domestic violence hotline if you feel unsafe.

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Kristina

This  article has been written by Kristina, the editor at Barking Royalty.