Most married couples at some point during their marriage find themselves experiencing a ‘dry spell,’ and when you do, you’re probably going to find yourself looking and wondering what you can do to get some action going in the bedroom.
So, to help you along, we’re sharing seven fabulous secrets to get more sexually active
1. Disconnect to connect
We’re all guilty of putting so much focus on our phones and our gadgets that we somehow forget that the real connection is what exists outside of such technology.
These days it’s easier to post an ‘I love you’ on your spouse’s facebook wall – professing how much you love each other on social media yet somehow these public proclamations of love can’t even get you a ‘yes’ in the bedroom.
Here’s a suggestion.
Try welcoming your partner home with a kiss and a warm hug. Ask them how their day went. Have a few hours where you’re just facing each other, just talking. Forget the world in your phones and see the world that is right in front you.
This is is one simple act that will undoubtedly help you get more sexually active.
2. Absence makes the heart grow fonder
When you have spent your days with your spouse for so many years, it is inevitable that sometimes, you and your spouse coexist.
You may come to realize that you’ve turned into a good roommate to your significant other. You may have spent so much of your time together, including your free time, that maybe you are taking each other and your life together for granted.
Why not spend a little of it away from each other? Learn a new hobby, sign up for classes, join organizations, spend time with your friends. The time you’ve spent away from each other will help you both look forward to the time that you will be spending together.
If you’re doing the reverse though and not spending too much time with your spouse, then make time for your partner.
Plan and commit to attending date nights (no matter what occurs in your life, or how much you don’t feel like going out). See a movie, have a picnic at the park, have dinner out of the house or do what millennials are currently doing ‘Netflix and chill,’ meaning, stay home and watch movies indoors while you both relax and enjoy each other!
It doesn’t matter what the activity is, as long as you’re just spending time with your partner-no distractions allowed and be sure to focus on what you find attractive in your spouse. In no time at all, you’ll start to notice those feelings develop into sexual attraction and before you know it, you’ll be more sexually active.
3. Send in reinforcements
Have you tried introducing or reintroducing pleasure enhancers in the bedroom, such as toys?
Maybe you have toyed around with the idea of using such devices previously or already have tried it and realized how much it aided you and your partner to get into that extremely passionate mood.
Being adventurous in the bedroom might help you appear more sexually attractive and being open about expressing your sexual desires may also encourage your partner to be more open about theirs, and it will promote trust and intimacy in your marriage.
The fourth secret for how to get more sexually active in your marriage lies in food! Enjoy a meal with your partner – a meal that consists of aphrodisiacs.
Aphrodisiacs are any foods or substances that increase sexual desires. Among the most popular and easily accessible of these aphrodisiacs are dark chocolate and wine.
Have a date night and put these on the menu. Not only will these foods make you feel good, but they are also good at making you more sexually attractive.
5. Speak their language
Turn on your partner by trying to speak their language.
Gary Chapman, the author of the famous ‘5 Love Languages,’ says that speaking to your significant other does not merely involve words but instead, a variety of other ways send loud messages to your spouse.
When you understand how your spouse communicates, you can do the same to them, which will bring you closer together and aid intimacy.
It’s essential to know how your partner is communicating with you.
Here are some common and frequently overlooked ways your spouse might be communicating to you:
- Words of affirmation
- Acts of service
- Giving gifts
- Spending quality time with you
- Physical touch.
Your spouse will also communicate to you sexually in diverse ways – if you learn how they communicate in the bedroom it will help you to get more sexually attractive in your marriage.
6. Get Active
Exercising can help increase libido, sexual excitement, and satisfaction.
The science behind it is that exercising helps in increasing blood flow all throughout the body. Furthermore, exercising increases hormonal levels such as testosterone, the hormone responsible for boosting your sex drive or libido.
It’s an undeniable fact that once you have reaped the benefits of exercising your partner will find you more sexually attractive and thereby increasing the chances of getting more sexually active.
There’s a reason why they say ‘couples who exercise together, stay together.’