The Power of Touch in Your Marriage

Power of touch in your marriage

How do you react to holding hands, a touch on the leg, a big hug from your spouse?  Is it something that you and your spouse engage in frequently or is it a lost element in your marriage? One of the key ingredients to maintaining physical intimacy is the power of touch.


What should you do if the act of physical touch is lacking in your relationship?


How do you create a connection that brings touch back into your relationship? Is physical touch important to your marriage?


One of the things that I often hear from couples is that as the years are passing, their amount of physical touch is declining. This is common in a long term relationship.  Don’t despair and don’t give up! There is good news. This has an easy fix. Awareness is the first step. Then take your awareness to the next level and implement some of these tips. Be present and mindful of the feelings you experience when touch occurs in your relationship and you will be off to a great start!


Tips to increase touch in your marriage

  • Hug more often and try lingering a few extra seconds in the arms of your spouse.
  • Hold hands when walking from the car to store or while taking a walk around your neighborhood.
  • Hold hands while watching television or place your hand on your spouse’s leg.
  • Snuggle up together on the couch and share a blanket.
  • Cuddle before you go to sleep and first thing in the morning before you get out of bed.
  • While gazing into your spouse’s eyes, hold hands.
  • Place your hand on your spouse’s arm or leg.
  • Rub your spouse’s feet while relaxing on the couch.
  • Give your spouse a neck massage while they are sitting in a chair.
  • Give your spouse a relaxing back massage.
  • Try something different and shampoo your spouse’s hair.


Touch is a powerful way to communicate and it will strengthen your marriage. Some of the positive feelings will be that of connection, improved attitude and will produce a smile for both you and your spouse. It can make you feel safe, cared for and create a lasting bond. It can also be a stress reducer and we can all benefit from reducing stress. A sensual touch can also rekindle the spark and reignite the passion. Touch is an essential tool in sustaining a satisfying and successful marriage.  


The act of physical touch is a powerful communicator and speaks loudly and clearly saying, “I want to feel connected”.  


So start today and reclaim the gift of touch. Your marriage will thank you.

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Michelle Scharlop
Marriage & Family Therapist, MS, LMFT
Michelle is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Plantation, Florida. She has over a decade of experience and specializes in all types of relationships. Michelle encourages meaningful conversations that restores broken connections, rebuilds
communication and reshapes unhealthy patterns. She helps facilitate change by listening to everyone in the therapy room and gaining an understanding of all perspectives. Her innovative approach is positive and encouraging, compassionate and respectful, warm with a gentle sense of humor. Michelle is also a clinical member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) and an approved Pre-Marital Course Provider for Broward County. Connect with her on Facebook for motivational messages and tips on improving your life and your relationships.

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