In every relationship, there is a person who is dominant and a person who is submissive. Most people don’t even realize which role they are in if they don’t sit down to truly think about it. Dominant partners tend to be more of the decision-makers. However, their traits can cause one or the other partner to lose interest or can even result in the dominant person creating more of a dictatorship that could become borderline abusive in some cases. Maybe you think there’s a healthy balance in your relationship? How can you tell? Are you an abusive dominant partner, or do you know when to let your partner shine, so there’s the balance? Take this test to find out.
1. Do you feel the need to take charge of decision making in the relationship or would you rather a more equal balance of power?
A. I definitely take charge.
B. I know what is best and it always works out
C. Sometimes, I feel the need and let my partner have that room
D. I think it’s good to have a balance
2. Do you have clear boundaries in your relationship when it comes to checking each other’s social media accounts, text messages, e-mails, finances, etc.?
A. I think it’s okay for my partner to share that stuff with me when I ask
B. Yes, we don’t do any of that. I don’t want to be intrusive and I trust my partner
C. My partner doesn’t ever ask to see mine, but they let me see theirs when I want
D. Yes, I would never want to invade my partner’s privacy like
3. How does it make you feel when your significant other makes plans for the two of you without discussing it with you first?
A. No way, I call the shots here
B. I think it’s nice when my partner surprises me
C. I always make the plans and my partner doesn’t mind
D. I try to make my partner feel special with a surprise plan, but I don’t mind if they do the same for me
4. Do you expect your significant other to check-in with you before making plans with anyone else?
A. Yes, and if I don’t like the plans, I definitely convey
B. We both do. We always keep each other informed
C. Yes, but most of the time I am the one with the plans
D. No, I don’t expect my partner to, but we do it out of respect for one another
5. Who do you think takes charge in your relationship?
A. Me, if I left it up to my partner, I don’t even want to know where we’d be
B. I am more the one to take charge, but I like when my partner does every once in a while,
C. I am definitely in charge and my partner knows that
D. I tend to be more of the decision-maker and take charge on things, but I don’t mind taking a back seat if my partner wants to decide on something
6. Who decides when you have sex?
A. I do most of the time
B. I don’t think either of us decide. Although I may initiate it more, my partner is always willing!
C. I do. Whenever I want to have sex, I act on it and my partner doesn’t ever turn me down.
D. We both do. I am a little more assertive in the bedroom, but my partner does surprise me every once in a while, and that’s nice too!
7. Do you feel you are superior to your partner, inferior or do you feel equal?
A. I am definitely superior and my partner isn’t afraid to admit that either
B. I am more of a go-getter, but I don’t mind. I am always looking for the next challenge.
C. I am superior, naturally and I am always impressing people with my drive and accomplishments
D. I think we are equal, and I like it that way. Sometimes my partner shines and sometimes I do
8. Do you have certain expectations such as chores, errands, or other things?
A. Yes, anything I need my partner always finds a way to fix it
B. No, we both have our own errands and chores we like to do
C. Yes, my partner knows I have to have my house kept just how I like it
D. No, we do things together or split up the tasks/responsibilities when we need to
9. Who controls the money?
A. Of course, I have to. If I let my partner do it, we would be broke
B. We evenly distribute the finances
C. We have a joint bank account. We both monitor our own spending and pay the bills with our combined money
D. I do. I make sure my partner is taken care of
10. Do you expect your significant other to dress, act or look a specific way?
A. Yes, my partner should always be presentable in my opinion.
B. No, my partner being the way they like is just fine with me
C. Yes, there is a reputation I have to uphold and can’t be seen with someone who I am embarrassed to walk next to
D. No, I always think my partner looks beautiful no matter what
