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10 Steps to Writing Your Own Marriage Vows

Steps to Writing Your Own Marriage Vows

Congratulations, you have found someone to share your life with! Getting married is making a commitment legally and publicly for a lifetime.  Marriage is a very serious undertaking. It is a registered institution in which families are created and developed. Many cultures and religions have marriage vows that complement traditional ceremonies.  However, in most cultures it is permissible to write your own vows.  Below are steps to consider in writing your own marriage vows as well as two sample templates.  

Below are 10 steps to consider in creating your own vows:

  1.  A wedding vow should be no more than one to three minutes long for both parties combined.  A concise wedding vow is well written.
  2.  A wedding vow should be taken seriously so your guest (witnesses) will take your union seriously. No jokes. All jokes are considered disrespectful to the sacristy ceremonious act of marriage.  
  3.  Will you include a higher power in your vows?- Before the presence of God.
  4.  Are there certain words that are taboo?- Some people omit the word obey. I promise to be faithful, love you and inspire you.
  5.  Have you discussed how your love will benefit each other from now to the end of time?- I will support you in all cycles of life for the rest of my life.
  6.  What do you want your love to create?- We will raise a family to share our love or I will help you make your dreams come into your reality.
  7. What promises are you making to each other?- I promise to love, honor, and encourage you.
  8. How will you handle interference in your marriage?- I promise to be faithful, strong and not allow anything to come between us.
  9. How long is your commitment for?- I promise this vow for the rest of our lives.
  10. It is a common practice for the woman to take the man’s last name upon marriage.  However, some brides elect to keep their maiden name and their husband’s last name. This needs to be discussed before writing your vows as you will be pronounced as a couple.  

Sample 1.  Wedding vows for a woman

I __________take _________________this day of __________________ as my lawful wedded husband before the presence of God, friends and family.  I love you. You have made me so happy. You have encouraged me and loved me. In this marriage, I vow to love you for better or worse, through sickness and through unstable financial times. I will be faithful to you, encourage you, honor you, comfort you, forgive you, and support you.  I will be your help mate. I will trust you.  We will raise a family with the values you and I hold dear. Our children will know what love is by our demonstration.  We will grow old together.  I promise to never let anyone or anything divide us. I will stay by your side for now and eternity.  I am so happy that you have chosen me as your partner to share the rest of your life with.  We will be as one. I will be your wife and take your name proudly.

Read more: Creating Memorable Marriage Vows For Her

Sample 2.  Wedding vows for a man

I __________take _________________this day of __________________ as my lawful wedded wife before the presence of God, friends and family.  I love you. I cannot image my life without you because you have encouraged me and loved me. In this marriage, I vow to love you for better or worse, through sickness and through unstable financial times. I will be faithful to you, encourage you, honor you, comfort you, trust you, forgive you, and support you. I will protect you and provide for you.  We are in agreement, to raise a family together, with the values you and I hold dear. Our children will know what love is by our demonstration.  We will grow old together.  I promise to never let anyone or anything divide us. I will stay by your side for now and eternity.  I am so happy that you have chosen me as your partner to share your life with.  I will be your husband.

Read more: 5 Special Wedding Vows for Him

These are standard wedding vows. They are samples provided freely by marriage.com.   Customize them for your special day. It is advisable that once each of you write your draft, the two of you sit down and talk about it.  Create your lifelong contract with a verbal discussion.  Just remember the basics of promise, time, and benefit to your spouse.  Congratulations and good luck.  

 


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