How to Nurture Your Strong Independent Female Partner

Stuart Fensterheim

Stuart Fensterheim, Licensed Clinical Social Worker

Expertise: Licensed Clinical Social Worker

As an author, blogger and podcaster, Stuart has helped couples around the world to experience a unique relationship in which they can feel special and important, confident... Read more

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, Licensed Clinical Social Worker , Licensed Clinical Social Worker

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Updated: 21 Oct, 2022

Table of Contents

Independent women still crave love and connection, so listen, respect her boundaries, and invite her to share her needs with you.
Stand beside her as equal partners, value her opinions, and create space for vulnerability while you support and celebrate her strengths.
Nurture your home as a safe harbor where she can be herself, share feelings, and know you’re there to listen, guide, and love without judgment.

The fight for sexual equality, women’s rights and equal pay for equal work have caused a definite impact on relationship equality. We now have generations of women who have learned from their strong female role models to be independent, powerful and to own their femininity in a fierce and unprecedented way.

What does that mean for the future of relationships? It may surprise you to know that independent women crave love and affection as we all do. For those of you who love them, this can pose a challenge in determining how to nurture your strong independent female partner.

Here’s adulting 101 on building a healthy relationship an independent woman in a relationship.

Attachment needs for an independent woman in a relationship

All of us have certain things we need from our partners to make us feel loved and important. These needs vary from person to person. What you, as the partner of a strong female personality needs to do, really listen to your partner. If you are open to her, she will show and tell you what it is she needs from you.

If your partner is a strong, self-reliant female, maybe you have found yourself looking for some common independent woman relationship problems. One of them is that she likes to take care of her emotions and feelings herself. She is not comfortable with letting out her emotions. However, you need to accept her with her walls. If she trusts you she may do a double take and come around to slowly start breaking her emotional walls and letting you in.

An independent woman in a relationship may not need as much emotional support as someone who is more co-dependent, but she may crave physical touch and want a lot of cuddling and touching. She may need more than she lets on to the world, and will show it only to you.

Do you find yourself asking, “how to handle a woman with a strong personality?” Remember even the strongest of us need to let down our guard and rely on someone else once in a while.

Sometimes even the most independent woman in a relationship will want to be vulnerable and let you be the “strong one”. If it’s very important to her to have equal power in the relationship, you need to be mindful of that. Make sure that you consider her opinions and input in all your decisions, don’t assume that you know what she wants or needs, let her communicate that to you.

Perhaps she needs to feel more appreciated, don’t we all? Just because your partner is an independent and capable person, doesn’t mean that she won’t like to hear you tell her that she’s appreciated for her efforts.

How to nurture your wife if she is an independent woman? You can acknowledge her as a strong person, a powerful partner and your intellectual equal, while still treating her like a queen and the most special woman in your life.

You need to respect an independent woman in a relationship

Don’t look down on, patronize or take her for granted.

Give her the respect that she deserves. She’s probably been told to “tone it down” or be less forceful in her life. Maybe she’s been told she’s too much or too masculine. That’s all BS.

Recognize and respect the independent woman in a relationship with you for being the incredible, beautiful, sexy force of nature that she is and be proud that she’s chosen you to be her life partner. She doesn’t need you, she wants you. Meet her where she is and the two of you can be an amazing power couple together.

Stand beside her

One of the best things about having a powerful female as your life partner is that you are both free to be yourselves. An independent woman in a relationship is not trying to change you because she’s secure in her own life.

You are a true partner to her that is proud to stand beside her as an equal. Having that kind of support and friendship is crucial to having a loving relationship. When you have an equal pairing, you eliminate a whole lot of drama in the relationship. You both see each other as an asset in each other’s life and move forward together to make a life that you both want and dream of.

Nurture your strong woman

Make your home a safe haven for an indepentdent woman in a relationship with you.

Being with you is the place where she can be free to be herself and allow herself to be vulnerable. Give her the space she needs to work out her stuff on her own and be willing to step in when she needs you to be a sounding board, give advice and be a helpful and nurturing partner.

Let her know that while you recognize that she is a force in her own right, you are always there to lean on if she feels the need. You are the safe harbor, the port in the storm, and your home is the place where she is able to just be with nothing to prove, nothing to show; just pure acceptance and nurturing love.

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Stuart Fensterheim Licensed Clinical Social Worker

As an author, blogger and podcaster, Stuart has helped couples around the world to experience a unique relationship in which they can feel special and important, confident in knowing they are loved deeply and that their presence matters. His weekend workshop, Two Days: Seven Conversations has become... Read more a popular venue for many to set off on their journey of connectedness. The Couples Expert Podcast consists of weekly provocative conversations offering the perspectives and insight of experts from a variety of relationship-related fields. Stuart also offers daily relationship video tips on The Couples Expert YouTube channel. Stuart practices in Scottsdale, Arizona, where he lives with his loving wife of many years, and their therapy dog, Ollie. Read less

(Stuart Fensterheim is also listed in Best Marriage Therapists in Scottsdale)