Get Ready to Rofl with These Valentine’s Day Tweets That Are Relatable Af

Chuck the ‘done to death’ cheesy love messages and get ready to chuckle with the funniest relationship tweets this V-Day.

Valentine’s Day is rarely as rosy and romantic as it’s shown in movies. For most people, it is about following their usual routine and ending their day with some ridiculously expensive champagne and ordering take away!

This Valentine’s day keep it real and appreciate the relationship you have. And maybe even laugh at the quirks and goofiness that makes your relationship fun.

Whether you are single or are in a committed relationship, here are the top Valentine tweets that’ll make you ROFL.

1. 1. 
      

      Person: “You have any plans for Valentine’s day?”

      Me: pic.twitter.com/zpNUyrav9A

      — Jack Mull (@J4CKMULL) January 24, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      Every Valentine’s Day card in history was signed on the dashboard on a car in a Walgreen’s parking lot.

      — Bill Dixon (@BillDixonish) February 3, 2016

1. 1. 
      

      the best thing about being single on valentine’s day is I get to eat all 2 dozen of these roses by myself

      — thomas violence (@thomas_violence) February 14, 2015

1. 1. 
      

      Two types of people on Valentine’s Day pic.twitter.com/mZHjdLjTUZ

      — T-Foots (@t_foots) February 1, 2016

1. 1. 
      

      me leaving instagram comments on Valentine’s Day
      pic.twitter.com/4r094qHH1s

      — GirlReligion (@girlreligionco) January 21, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      Me on Valentine’s Day: pic.twitter.com/z5sVawLmhh

      — feelstagram 🐶 (@feelstagram_) January 25, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      Me on Valentine’s day: ” This is a money making scheme we shouldn’t be practicing it!”

      Also me on Valentine’s day: pic.twitter.com/AzoItxULvz

      — Nikesh Kooverjee 🚗 (@NikeshKooverjee) January 29, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      That moment you realize your milk has a Valentine’s Day date & you don’t… pic.twitter.com/KX2S83bK8s

      — Curtis Lepore (@curtislepore) February 1, 2016

1. 1. 
      

      “What are your plans for Valentine’s day?”
      Me: pic.twitter.com/Agoi5YyV6P

      — Ivycado 🥑✨ (@IvyKungu) February 12, 2017

1. 1. 
      

      If you’re single on Valentine’s Day you’re allowed to have two dinners right?

      — Mitchell Davis (@mmitchelldaviss) February 6, 2016

1. 1. 
      

      Valentine’s Day really separates the men from the boys, and then separates me from both of them in a third location

      — Megan Amram (@meganamram) February 15, 2015

1. 1. 
      

      pic.twitter.com/3vDspZRYLc

      — helen (@helen) August 20, 2017

1. 1. 
      

      My Valentines day reservation is Done pic.twitter.com/fzaRz1hteX

      — خان❣ (@Maaahyyy) January 27, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      Yup that just about sums it up #singleprob pic.twitter.com/D2JlIdSOS8

      — Single Probs (@singleprob) February 17, 2014

1. 1. 
      

      me realizing i have a crush on someone pic.twitter.com/dPuNUnIm6g

      — Hannah Giorgis (@ethiopienne) March 9, 2017

1. 1. 
      

      Last minute festival shopping pic.twitter.com/M482osWqGG

      — dorku (@Dorkstar) February 14, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      Wow, look at the Edible Arrangement I got for Valentine’s day. So beautiful pic.twitter.com/sTAOyyj0OL

      — Cool Eric (@OBiiieeee) February 14, 2015

1. 1. 
      

      Fun Valentine’s Day Tip: For the cost of a dozen red roses, you could get a pitcher of beer and a dozen wings. Prob even pay for parking too

      — Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) February 4, 2016

1. 1. 
      

      Can’t wait for Valentines Day. I’m gonna run into as many restaurants as I can shouting “Knew I’d find you here! You bastard” then run out.

      — 🌈🌈Ruthe Phoenix🌈🌈 (@RuthePhoenix) January 24, 2015

1. 1. 
      

      Hope everyone who uses the word “bae” has a terrible Valentine’s Dae 💘

      — Gloria Fallon (@GloriaFallon123) February 14, 2015

1. 1. 
      

      Let’s all take a moment of silence this Valentine’s Day to think about the couples who started dating end of January

      — Mike Ginn (@shutupmikeginn) February 14, 2015

1. 1. 
      

      I told my wife her Valentine’s Day gift this year is the privilege of being married to me. She’s so happy she still hasn’t stopped crying.

      — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 14, 2013

1. 1. 
      

      Valentines Day pic.twitter.com/GSAPTFNgEv

      — Sam Reece (@SamReece) January 23, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      catch me on valentines day wearing a flowy top, crossfaded off allergy meds and a glass of wine, twirling to fleetwood mac in my bedroom mirror

      — jaboukie (@jaboukie) January 25, 2018

1. 1. 
      

      This Valentines give her what she really wants: a throne forged from the bones of her enemies & a relentless reign of terror over the masses

      — Jeff Wysaski (@pleatedjeans) February 13, 2015

1. 1. 
      

      Sometimes I think ‘maybe I should go out and meet people’ and then I remember I don’t really like people or leaving my house. #whyimsingle

      — Tammy Watson (@Tamashay) February 9, 2017

Continue exploring this topic

Talk to our Marriage.com AI Relationship Coach

Chat with me, ask questions and get help

Start Chatting

Marriage.com AI: Your Relationship Guide

Talk through what's on your mind.

Automated

Hi, I'm your relationship guide. What's on your mind?

YOU COULD START WITH

What are some funny Valentine's Day tweets?

Where can I find relatable Valentine's Day humor?

AI guidance only - not therapy. In crisis? Call a helpline or Find a Therapist

Terms

Marriage.com Editorial Team Relationship & Marriage Advice

The Marriage.com Editorial Team is a group of experienced relationship writers, experts, and mental health professionals. We provide practical and research-backed advice on relationships. Our content is thoroughly reviewed by experts... Read more to ensure that we offer high-quality and reliable relationship advice. Read less

Marriage.com Assessment

What Help Does Your Relationship Need Most Right Now Quiz

Reviewed byJennifer Schulz, LCSW

Backed by relationship science and evidence-based psychology, this assessment helps identify the area of your relationship that deserves the most attention right now, whether things feel strong or slightly off. Research shows that even healthy relat...

Questions: 20 | Last updated: Jan 23, 2026

Sample Question

When you and your partner talk about something important…

We listen with care — even hard talks feel safe and productive

We try to talk, but lately emotional closeness feels harder to reach

I want to be open, but part of me still guards my heart

Our discussions sometimes spiral or end unresolved

It’s hard to feel close because our physical intimacy hasn’t felt strong lately

We often see things differently about goals or priorities

Take the Quiz Now