A relationship can only thrive when there are some crucial ingredients in place. One of the underrated elements of a healthy relationship is respect. Unfortunately, many partners end up noticing signs he doesn’t respect you after some time passes.
Some people correctly see respect as admiring their partner. Other people can view respect as acknowledging a symbol of authority and submitting to them. When respect is missing in a relationship, there is no value or importance attached to the other person’s presence.
In this article, we will be looking at what respect means and its importance in a relationship. Also, for those who feel disrespected in any way, we will be reviewing some signs he doesn’t respect you.
What is the meaning of respect, and why is it vital in a relationship
Respect is recognizing your partner for who they are and acknowledging that they have emotions and feelings that should not be unlooked.
When you respect your partner, you are aware that they have their individuality, and you should not impose yours on them. A relationship with mutual respect will stand the test of time because both partners will be committed to ensuring that they make each other feel better.
A. William Benitez, in his book ‘Relationship,’ talks about mutual respect, boundaries, love and other crucial elements of a relationship. He sees mutual respect as crucial to the well-being of a healthy and lasting relationship.
How can you tell if he doesn’t give you enough respect
If you ever asked, “how to know if he doesn’t respect me?” you can easily tell when his actions put you off, and he is not remorseful when you tell him about them.
We all make mistakes and our actions may hurt the ones around us. But if you respect and care for the ones around you, you will feel guilty and take steps to make up for your mistake.
In a healthy relationship, if your boyfriend or husband erroneously offends you via an act of disrespect, he will feel bad and apologize to you when he is informed about his inactions. However, if your boyfriend or husband feels that there is no big deal, he doesn’t respect you.
20 common signs that he does not have respect for you
Are you wondering, or have you asked: “how to know if he has no respect for me?” Some telltale signs show that he doesn’t have respect for you. With these signs, you can be sure if your boyfriend or partner cares about how you feel or not.
1. Degrades you in public
One of the signs he doesn’t respect you is when he treats you shabbily in public. If he talks to you disrespectfully in front of friends, family, or people who don’t know the both of you, he doesn’t respect you.
Partners in relationships who have respect for each other do not wash their dirty linen in public. Instead, they will wait until they are alone before sorting out their differences.
2. Doesn’t care about your thought process and ideologies
It is not common for partners in a relationship to have the same thought process and ideologies because they are not from the same background. But when your partner does not recognize this fact, he imposes his opinions on you and treats yours as trash; he doesn’t respect you.
3. Doesn’t answer messages or calls
When a man has no respect for you, it will be difficult to reach him via calls and messages.
He would see your calls and messages but intentionally ignore them because he does not prioritize you. Also, he doesn’t care if it is urgent, as he would only return your messages or calls when he is in the mood.
4. Treats meetups with levity
One of the sure signs he doesn’t respect you is how he handles your meetups with disregard. For instance, if you plan to go on a date with him, and he doesn’t show up without reason or arrive late without remorse, he doesn’t respect you.
5. Unpleasant comments about your loved ones
Partners in relationships are expected to extend their love and affection to each other’s loved ones. However, if you discover that your partner has the constant habit of badmouthing your family and friends, it means that he doesn’t respect you.
He doesn’t care about what you feel when he makes unpleasant comments about your loved ones because he doesn’t value the important people in your life.
6. Lies to your face
One of the common signs of disrespect is when dishonesty is in the picture.
If you know the truth about something and your boyfriend keeps lying to your face, he doesn’t respect you. When he finds out that you are aware of the truth and keeps making excuses instead of apologizing, you can be sure that he disrespects you.
7. Doesn’t recognize you around others
Have you ever been in a situation when your boyfriend was in a public group, and it was apparent that he treated you like you didn’t exist?
If your partner treats you like a stranger when you are with him in public, he doesn’t respect you. If your boyfriend respects you, he will treat you with honor even with 1000 people around and you happen to pass by.
8. Always attracted to others
Have you asked yourself the question, “what are the signs my boyfriend doesn’t respect me?”. One of the signs your man is disrespecting you is if he is attracted to other girls, and he lets you know.
In a relationship, it is normal to have a slight crush on people outside your relationship. However, the love and respect you have for your partner would prevent you from being vocal about it.
9. Compares you to his ex and other women
One of the obvious signs he doesn’t respect you is when he compares you to other girls, especially his ex.
When he compares you, you are an option in his life that he could replace if given a chance. Comparing you with other people shows he is a disrespectful man who does not care about your feelings. More so, it means that he is blind to the worth and value you possess.
10. Tells his friends negative things about you
There is probably no higher level of disrespect from a man than when he regularly says negative things to his friends concerning you. If your boyfriend knows your flaws and bad habits, he would not mention them to anyone.
However, know when a man disrespects you, he will constantly badmouth you to anyone who cares to listen, and he would not mind doing it in your presence.
11. Flirting with other people
The act of flirting with other people when in a romantic relationship is one of the surefire signs he doesn’t respect you. He might tell you that it is harmless and he is not sleeping with them. However, cheating doesn’t start and end in bed.
Someone can cheat on their partner by merely getting emotionally entangled with them. Hence, when you notice that your man seems to be romantically linked with other people, it is certain that he doesn’t respect you.
12. Does not give you his full attention
Every boyfriend who truly loves his partner would be interested in listening to what they have to say or whatever they want to do. When you have a suggestion in the relationship, a man who respects you will listen to it.
Even though he might not be in full support, he will acknowledge the fact that you have something to say. Also, he might go to the extent of helping your suggestion sound better than it could have been.
Whenever you are together with a man who respects you, he will give you his total attention.
13. Doesn’t care about your feelings
A great boyfriend or husband who respects you will always care about your feelings; will not be oblivious to them. This is one of the reasons why some people feel safe with their partners, and others don’t.
When someone does not care about your feelings, they can hurt you and get away with it.
In addition, it would be hard to believe that such people love you because their actions towards you will be different from what they say. For example, a man who respects you will neither want to make you cry nor hurt you.
Watch this video to learn more about why people stop caring about their partner’s feelings and turn cold towards them:
Have you ever been spoken to in a way that makes you feel like the best version of yourself? This is how a respectful man or boyfriend should make you feel.
In contrast, one of the signs of disrespect from a man is when he speaks to you in a degrading way that leaves you feeling worse off instead of feeling better.
A guy who knows your worth and how much you mean to him will not treat you rudely. If he realizes that some of his words are rude, he will apologize and desist from using such words.
15. Less concerned about your belongings
It is important to be sensitive to some little things that tell you more about your partner in a relationship.
For example, he does not respect you if you notice that he has little or no care for your belongings. A good partner knows that your personal belongings mean a lot to you because they are part of your identity.
Hence, the way he treats your personal belongings says a lot about how he would treat you. Therefore, he will handle them with care like they are his own because of your value. But, if he doesn’t care if they get damaged, then he does not respect you.
16. Doesn’t spend time with you
It is expected for romantic partners to get caught up with life, work, and other things. This is because they have their individuality to attend to, and it is normal. However, romantic partners need to make sufficient time to spend with each other so that the relationship will not suffer.
Research has proven that quality time between couples is a key marker of relationship satisfaction and longevity in relationships. It includes times when you put aside everything else and focus on having a meaningful time with your partner.
There and then, if you notice that he doesn’t spare time to see or hang out with you, and he regularly complains about other things taking his time, he doesn’t respect you. Someone who respects you will make out time for you because he values you.
17. Doesn’t consult you about critical decisions
When he doesn’t seek your opinion before making some crucial decisions, it is one of the signs he doesn’t respect you. The essence of having a partner in a relationship is having someone with whom you can always put heads together when you are at a crossroads.
It should be a natural action for partners to seek each other’s advice before doing something important. However, if you notice he is used to telling you the outcomes of his actions, he doesn’t need your input when making decisions. Hence, he doesn’t respect you!
18. Doesn’t trust you
Trust is a big deal in a relationship, and it is closely linked with having respect for your partner. This means that when you trust someone, you should automatically respect them. If you notice that he is struggling to trust you, then it is one of the signs he doesn’t respect you.
Research has proven that mutual trust is a significant factor in relationship building and improvement. It often determines the satisfaction levels of the people involved.
Sometimes, the absence of trust could be from past incidents that have seared their heart, so it might be hard for them to trust people. Hence, be patient with them while they work on getting to trust and, alongside, respecting you.
19. Doesn’t celebrate your accomplishments
How will you feel when you share your wins with someone, and they give you the cold shoulder? You will get the impression that they are not happy about your accomplishments, and you will most likely not tell them when something similar happens next time.
If you notice that your partner is barely interested in celebrating your wins with you, then it is one of the big signs he doesn’t respect you.
20. Makes you feel dispensable
In a relationship, it is expected for both partners to feel indispensable because it gives them a sense of safety, trust, and loyalty. However, if he rubs it directly or indirectly in your face that he can easily find a replacement for you, then it is one of the signs he doesn’t respect you.
On the other hand, a partner who respects you will make you feel like an integral part of his life. They will make you feel appreciated, valued and that you are precious to them.
It is important to mention that partners in relationships deserve to be respected by each other.
If you have confirmed some of the signs he doesn’t respect you, it is important to discuss this with him. Then, if he is unwilling to change, you might have to seek professional help or move on with your life.
Someone who doesn’t respect you can never understand your worth, and it would be a tormenting experience having to continue such a relationship with them.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action.