3 Reasons why girls get confused about guy being friendly or flirty
Sometimes, it can get confusing if a guy is flirting or just being friendly, and you might make a wrong move.
Check out why it happens:
Some guys have the happy-go-lucky attitude
One of the reasons why some girls ask, “Is he attracted to me or just being nice?” is because of the guy’s cheerful and lighthearted disposition. They get confused because they cannot tell if the guy’s attitude is from a romantic standpoint or not.
If you are long-time friends with a very free guy, you will be confused about his real intentions because he could be masking his feelings with his attitude.
Some guys have sugar-coated tongues
If you are close with a guy with a sugar-coated tongue, it would be hard for you to tell if his compliments are flirtatious or not. This is why some girls ask if a guy compliments you.
Is he interested?
Some guys leverage on this ability to confuse the girl, making it hard for her to know their true intentions.
Some guys are more caring than the others
Another reason girls get confused and ask, “Is he into me or just being nice?” because of their caring attitude.
Some guys are more caring than their counterparts, and girls love this! If the friendship continues for a long time, the girl might be forced to believe that the guy is flirting with them because of their caring attitude.
15 ways that tell you if he’s flirting or being friendly
If you are asking does he fancy me or is he just being friendly, there are 15 ways to help you decipher:
1. How he gets more familiar with you
If he is flirting: Are you confused if he is friendly or flirty? One way to know a guy who is flirting is by the information he wants to know. A flirting guy will want to know what makes you special, what makes you happy, and other sensitive information.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy will want to get more familiar with you by asking questions about your childhood, college, favorite music, etc.
2. His touch
If he is flirting: For the flirty touch vs friend touch, you need your guts to encrypt this. If his touch feels different every time his skin touches yours, he could be flirting with you.
If he is friendly: When you receive a friendly touch, you feel nothing. And most times, your guts do not tell you they are trying to send a message.
3. How he speaks about himself
If he is flirting: If you are thinking is he flirting or just being nice, you can know how he talks about himself. A flirty guy will talk about his love life, best date, romantic nights, and related topics.
The reason is to allow you to have a glimpse into his romantic side.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy will talk about his interests, hobbies, work, etc. They will rarely mention anything related to their love life.
4. The way he greets you
If he is flirting: A flirty guy will act more composed and cool when he wants to greet you. This is to allow you to feel comfortable with him, and if you are sensitive enough, you can tell from his gestures.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy greets you the way he would greet everyone. If you want to know, “Is he just a friend or is he interested?” Watch the way he greets everyone around you and compare it to yours.
5. How he makes jokes with you
If he is flirting: When most flirty guys make jokes, it is done purposely.
They want to activate something within you. And if you are observant, you will see that he is bent on getting a reaction from you. Sometimes, the jokes might be too excessive because he wants you to be obsessed with him.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy will joke with you the same way he does with others. You will enjoy his company because you are not under pressure to laugh at his jokes. Most times, his jokes are from a carefree and innocent standpoint.
6. How he holds little discussions with you
If he is flirting: Whenever there is a chance for a little discussion, the flirty guy will want the conversation to go deeper. He will do this regularly because he is trying to know you more, and he will ask questions to keep the conversation going deeper.
If he is friendly: On the other hand, the friendly guy holds regular short conversations that are work-related, school-related, etc. Even if you talk regularly with him, he is not trying to bond with you. If you share a niche with him, most conversations would be centered on that.
7. How he behaves around you
If he is flirting: A flirty guy changes his behavior when he is around you. He tries to act more composed and attentive. He also tries to match your energy at that period so that you can easily notice him. Also, if he is nervous around you, he is flirty.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy normally interacts with no strings attached. He interacts with everyone, including you, in a sweet manner. He does not try to fake any behavior.
8. How he discusses other girls
If he is flirting: The way a guy discusses other girls makes them ask questions like, is he just a friend or is he interested?
A flirty guy will prefer speaking about girls he had a crush on, those who broke his hearts, and his past escapades. He would also tell you indirectly that he is single.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy will see you as someone he can count on for advice. If he has a crush on someone or has relationship issues, he will share it with you.
9. His energy levels with you
If he is flirting: When a flirty guy is around you, he will try to keep his energy levels high. Even though the atmosphere is dull, he will try to make it lively and cheer you up. Everything looks exciting to the flirty guy if he’s with you.
If he is friendly: The friendly guy barely notices if the atmosphere is dull, and if he does, he does not consciously do anything. If he is discussing with you, he can have his mind somewhere else. Sometimes, he could be on his phone when he is with you.
10. His interest in knowing you more
If he is flirting: If you are wondering how to tell if a guy is flirting or just being friendly, watch how he wants to know you more.
A flirty guy will be quick to point out the similarities you share, and he would indirectly tell you how cool it would be to be partners. He is less concerned about your other peculiarities because he is finding a connecting point with you.
If he is friendly: In comparison, a friendly guy would be patient to listen, and he would contribute when he needs to. You will easily know it’s a harmless conversation for normal friendship bonding.
11. How he tries to impress you
If he is flirting: If you ask does he like me or is he just being nice, watch the way he shows off his best side to impress you. For instance, if he is good at cooking, he would ensure you appreciate that side of him which would give you more reasons to like him.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy is not after any glory. He only tries to impress you to remind you that he’s a smart friend. He would not force you to give compliments about something he’s good at.
12. The nature of his questions
If he is flirting: A flirty guy asks questions with an intended direction, and you can easily guess after the first few questions. They will want to know more about your love and sex life.
If he is friendly: A friendly guy will ask regular questions that pertain to your welfare, work-life, family, etc.
If he is flirting: A flirty guy goes the extreme when they are teasing, and most times, you are the center of their jokes. If your friends are around, they will notice he is stylishly picking on you.
If he is friendly: If you have male friends, you will know their banters are normal jokes. Their jokes don’t mean that they don’t like you.
14. His eye contact
If he is flirting: It’s normal to maintain eye contact, but you should be suspicious if the eye contact comes with a long gaze. You will observe that his gaze tries to communicate with you, making you realize thathe is interested in you.
If you find him casting long gazes at different intervals, he is flirting with you.
If he is friendly: Eye contact shows the other person that we are listening or attentive. And if the guy maintains normal eye contact, he is approachable and friendly.
The video below discusses the type of eye contact that is sexual and flirtatious and how you can identify them:
If he is flirting: To answer the question of how to tell if a guy is flirting or just being friendly, you can tell from their attention. It is easy to know when a flirty guy is trying to give you their attention.
It will always look forced and unnatural, and the reason is that they want to impress you.
If he is friendly: Friendly guys pay normal attention during conversations, texting, etc. You can easily detect that they are not trying to force attention.
No one better tells the difference between flirting and being friendly than the girl involved. You have to be sensitive to the slightest details because even the friendly guy might be subtly flirting with you.
If you think a guy is flirty, all you need do is flirt back and watch his reaction to confirm your suspicion. Another way to fix this is to ask them about their intentions instead of giving you unending signals.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.