36 Funny Christmas Quotes to Share and Make Others Smile

Christmas is the year’s most celebrated holiday that occurs on December 25th. The meaning for Christmas is to recognize the birth of Christ, of which the exact date is not known.

Everyone feels fortunate to have their family at Christmas time, and it is celebrated at homes and churches worldwide.

Festivities surrounding Christmas

The celebrations include decorating the entire house, spending time with the family, and shopping for your friends and relatives.

On this occasion, all family members spend time together as they bake cookies, make fudge, and prepare a big Christmas dinner, with all the trimmings.

People actually look forward to this holiday’s hustle and bustle. The children love to see each other at Christmas. They spend their time playing games and sharing the new gifts that Santa Claus brought for each of them.

No occasion can go by without some laughter.

And here we have some funny Christmas quotes for you and your family to enjoy:

1. Why was Santa’s little helper feeling unhappy?

Ans: Because he had very low self-esteem.

2. Why is Christmas, mummies favorite holiday?

Ans: They’re into all the wrapping.

3. What do you call an elf wearing ear muffs?

Ans: Anything you want because he can’t hear you. (haha)

4. What is Santa’s nationality?

Ans: North Polish.

5. What is every elf’s favorite type of music?

Ans: Wrap.

6. What are Santa’s little helpers called?

Ans: Subordinate clauses.

7. Where does Santa keep his money?

Ans: At the local snow bank.

8. What is every parent’s favorite Christmas Carol?

Ans: Silent Night.

9. What happens to elves when they are being naughty?

Ans: Santa hands them the sack.

10. Why didn’t the skeleton attend the Christmas party?

Ans: He had no-body to go with.

11. What would you call a greedy elf?

Ans: Elfish.

12. What do snowmen have for breakfast?

Ans: Ice Crispies or Frosted Flakes.

13. What is a frog hanging from the ceiling called?

Ans: A Mistletoad.

14. Two women were chatting, and one of them says, “I took my husband to the Christmas market yesterday.”

“And, did someone want to buy him?” asks the other. (LOL)

15.Why did Santa place a clock in his sleigh?

Ans: He wanted to see time fly!

16. Who never eats at the Christmas dinner?

Ans: The turkey – it’s stuffed.

17. What are snowmen usually wearing on their heads?

Ans: Icecaps.

18. What is an old snowman called?

Ans: Water.

19. How do you know that Santa is good at karate?

Ans: He has a black belt.

20. What do you get when you make a snowman and a vampire angry?

Ans: Frostbite.

21. What did one turkey ask another?

Ans: “Do you believe in life after Christmas?”

22. Why does the Christmas tree need to go to the barber?

Ans: It needed to be trimmed.

23. What does Santa get if he gets stuck in a chimney?

Ans: Claustrophobia!

24. Why did the turkey have to join the band?

Ans: Because it had the drumsticks!

25. How do snowmen travel?

Ans: They ride an icicle!

26. Why is Christmas similar to a day at work?

Ans: You do all the work, and the fat guy wearing the suit gets all the credit.

27. “Santa Claus is lucky as he gets to visit people only once a year.”– Victor Borge
28. “I have not taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.”–Winston Spear
29. “Tea is compulsory at Christmas, but relatives are optional!” –  Robert Godden
30. “I love Christmas because I receive a lot of lovely presents that I can’t wait to exchange.”– Henny Youngman
31. A lot of banks have a new kind of Christmas club in operation. The new club helps you save money to payback for last year’s gifts
32. I left Santa some gluten-free cookies and organic soy milk, so he put a solar panel in my stocking.
33. I am mentally ready for Christmas but not financially (oops!)
34. Christmas is definitely the year’s most magical time… I just watched all my money magically disappear.
35. Christmas shopping has never been an easy or pleasant task for me.
36. Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never really seen a man trying to wrap a present on Christmas.

Hope these jokes will keep you laughing through the holidays.

Merry Christmas!