When we talk about relationships, we mostly think about how to improve the connection with our partner. We try to improve the communication part.
Sometimes, we try to improve trust, confidence, respect and all the aspects so the relationship can become better.
Mistakenly, most of the time we overlook the importance of physical connection. Put it in other words, somehow we deny the importance of sex connection. I am not referring to a promiscuous tendency that we many of us are attempting to solve through sexual encounters.
Using the physical connection to improve relationships
That behavior in itself deserves a completely different approach. I am referring about using the physical connection, meaning sex activity with your partner, which ultimately will improve your relationship overall.
More than 100 years ago, Sigmund Freud stated that sexual function is vital to diminish emotional and psychological tension.
Unfortunately, that statement has been taken beyond the context, whether due to religious or philosophical aspects, which may be manifested through the moral, social principles imprinted by the society in our unconscious.
Diminished attraction to your partner is a problem
The problem seems to be that when we are dealing with conflict in our relationships, the sex desire is also deteriorated, not because the lack of desire in itself, but because the conflict has created the scenario for that.
Your sexual libido is not the problem; it is the attraction to your partner that has diminished.
You may be thinking, who would be interested in sex if there is a conflict or rage or resentment towards the partner.
Create the proper environment for recreating the passion
You are right on this logic, but if we are really trying to enhance the flame of the relationship, it would be recommendable to explore that department and to create the proper environment for that to happen, and yes remember we are trying to create or rather re-create the passion that was there.
Here are ways to enhance the flame of the relationship
- Self-stimulation and mutual masturbation go a long way in enhancing the intimacy of the relationship and increasing sexual satisfaction.
- Exercising regularly serves the dual purpose of building a positive body image and boosting the levels of sexual satisfaction in a relationship. Exercising even for 30 minutes a day can also alleviate stress levels and contribute to a healthier mental well being.
- Sex toys and erotica are your best bet at enhanced sexual desire and fun in your sack sessions. Stack up some sex toys and pile on some erotica for a steamy sexual experience in your bedroom.
- That lubrication is just for middle-aged couples, is a myth. Lube up for a more pleasurable and long lasting action between sheets. It takes care of vaginal dryness and symptoms like itching and burning due to falling estrogen levels in women.
Follow these tips, along with keeping the lines open for sexual communication. Your sex life will gradually progress from down in dumps to a thriving sex life. Motivation and willingness are the pivots in enhancing the quality of any relationship.
Just remember William James quote: “We don’t laugh because we’re happy – we’re happy because we laugh”.
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More by Carlos Ortiz Rea