Perinatal Loss: Understanding, Coping, and Finding Support

It can be challenging to navigate the complicated emotions associated with perinatal loss. Losing a baby may leave people and families wracked with grief and anxiety. 

In this post, we’ll look at the many facets of prenatal loss, talk about coping mechanisms for the emotional fallout, and offer tips on how to find real support along this trying journey.

What is perinatal loss? 

Perinatal loss, or the perinatal medical term, is the heartbreaking experience of losing a baby during pregnancy or shortly after birth. Coping with perinatal loss involves navigating through unique emotional, physical, and psychological hurdles. 

Acknowledging the pain, seeking support from loved ones or pregnancy loss counseling, and finding healthy ways to commemorate the lost child is crucial. By understanding perinatal loss definition and its effects, individuals can begin to heal and find solace amidst the pain.

What causes perinatal loss? 

Perinatal loss can be brought about by several things, such as genetic abnormalities, difficulty with the mother’s health, infections, placental disorders, and concerns with fetal development. 

Although medical advancements have decreased certain risks, the specific cause may not always be apparent, adding to the emotional strain. Perinatal death is not the parents’ responsibility, so seeking medical counsel and leading a healthy lifestyle can all help reduce the chances.

Types of perinatal loss 

Perinatal grief and loss can be of various kinds, and here is a quick look into each one. This will give you a better understanding of the medical condition behind it.

• Miscarriage

If there is a loss within the first 20 weeks of pregnancy, it’s considered a miscarriage. It can occur due to uterine problems, hormone imbalances, or genetic abnormalities.

• Stillbirth

When a baby is lost after 20 weeks of pregnancy, it’s called a stillbirth. This tragic occurrence can be brought on by several circumstances, such as placental issues, infections, or concerns with the mother’s health. 

• Newborn mortality

Neonatal mortality happens within the first 28 days of life and can be brought on by preterm delivery, congenital disorders, or medical issues. Parents who have spent time connecting with their infant could suffer perinatal grief in their struggle to cope with the loss of hope and expectations.

• Ectopic conception

In an ectopic pregnancy, the fertilized egg implants outside the uterus, in the fallopian tube. The baby will not survive, and the mother may suffer a perinatal bereavement.

• Medical termination

Sometimes, medical professionals recommend terminating a pregnancy due to severe fetal abnormalities or maternal health risks. This decision can be agonizing for parents.

• Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS)

SIDS refers to the unexplained death of an otherwise healthy baby under one year of age. Coping with these types of perinatal loss involves a journey of healing that varies for each individual and family. 

The emotional impact of dealing with perinatal loss 

There can be several emotional impacts when dealing with pregnancy loss and perinatal grief.

• Shock and disbelief

First and foremost, shock and disbelief often accompany the news of perinatal loss. The sudden shattering of goals and expectations can leave parents grappling with unreality. As reality sets in, the stages of grief stillbirth can intensify. Parents mourn the loss of their baby and their envisioned future.

• Guilt and self-blame

Guilt and self-blame can become overwhelming emotions. Parents may question if they could have done something differently to prevent the loss. These feelings are common, but it’s crucial to understand that perinatal loss is usually beyond anyone’s control and not the result of any wrongdoing.

• Anger

Parents might feel angry at their bodies, medical professionals, or even the universe for the injustice of their situation. This anger can be confusing and challenging, but acknowledging and expressing it healthily is essential for healing.

• Isolation

Feelings of isolation can intensify the emotional impact. So, the distress can get overwhelming. In such a time, support groups and therapists provide much-needed understanding and validation.

How perinatal loss affects couples & families

It’s important to know how to cope with pregnancy loss since perinatal loss reverberates through couples and families, reshaping their dynamics and testing their bonds.

• Strained relationships

The shared experience of perinatal loss can either draw couples closer or strain their relationship. Grief can manifest differently in partners, leading to misunderstandings and emotional distance. Effective communication and mutual support are vital during this trying time.

• Parental roles and identity

Losing a child challenges parents’ sense of identity and their envisioned roles. Mothers and fathers may grapple with inadequacy or guilt, impacting their self-esteem and parenting journey.

• Siblings and extended family

The perinatal loss extends to siblings and extended family members who may struggle to comprehend the grief. Open conversations and involving them in healing can help forge stronger connections.

• Long-term effects

Perinatal loss can leave enduring emotional imprints. Couples and families may need ongoing support navigating subsequent pregnancies or commemorating their lost child’s memory.

Watch Tanika Dillard, a motivational speaker, elaborate on ‘Breaking the silence of pregnancy loss’:

Coping strategies for dealing with perinatal loss 

Couples may find solace through disparate coping mechanisms. While some seek relief in support groups, others may turn inward or seek professional counseling.

•  Acknowledging grief

Allowing yourself to acknowledge and express your sorrow entirely is a critical step. Understand that the emotions you’re experiencing are valid and part of the healing process.

• Seeking support

Connect with support networks through friends, family, or support groups tailored explicitly to perinatal loss. Sharing your feelings and hearing others’ stories can foster a sense of belonging and understanding.

• Professional counseling:

Engage with mental health professionals experienced in perinatal loss. Therapy provides a safe space to explore complex emotions, develop coping skills, and navigate the grieving journey.

• Rituals and memorials

Creating meaningful ways or memorials can provide a sense of closure and remembrance. Plant a tree, light a candle, or engage in activities that pay tribute to the memory of your baby.

• Creative outlets

Art, writing, music, or other creative pursuits can be therapeutic outlets for processing emotions that words alone may struggle to capture.

• Joining online communities

Engage with online forums or social media groups focused on perinatal loss. These platforms provide a space to connect with individuals who share similar experiences, offering a sense of community even from a distance.

• Educating others

Advocate for perinatal loss awareness to break the stigma and misconceptions surrounding it. Educating others can empower both yourself and your community.

• Seeking joy amidst grief

While grief is profound, finding moments of joy and connection can coexist. Embracing small pleasures and positive experiences can help balance the emotional scale.

• The healing journey

Remember that the emotional impact of perinatal loss is valid and deserving of acknowledgment. Through understanding, perinatal loss support, and open communication, individuals and families can gradually find ways to navigate the complex emotional terrain and move forward while cherishing the memory of their lost child.

Commonly asked questions

Having read all about perinatal loss, let us look at some frequently asked questions on this issue and time. 

• Who should I consult for help after pregnancy loss? 

Speak with a licensed mental health professional, such as a therapist or counselor with perinatal loss experience. Religious leaders, support organizations, and medical professionals can all provide advice. To ensure you receive the proper support and healing, look for people familiar with the complex emotional issues of pregnancy loss.

• How long does it take to recover from perinatal loss? 

Recovery from perinatal loss varies for each individual. Grieving and healing processes have no fixed timeline. Factors such as the type of loss, personal coping mechanisms, and support received can influence the duration. Be patient with yourself and seek professional help if needed to navigate the journey.

• What is a late-term perinatal loss? 

Late-term perinatal loss is the heartbreaking event of losing a baby after the 20th week of pregnancy but before birth. This devastating occurrence can result from various medical, genetic, or unforeseen complications. It brings profound grief and requires specialized care and support for the parents and family.

• What is the difference between perinatal death and neonatal death? 

Perinatal death encompasses fetal loss after the 20th week of pregnancy until the first 28 days of life. Neonatal death refers explicitly to losing a baby during the first 28 days after birth. Both represent tragic events, but neonatal death occurs after birth, while perinatal death includes prenatal and neonatal losses.

• What are examples of perinatal loss?  

Miscarriage, stillbirth, neonatal mortality (within 28 days of birth), ectopic pregnancy, and medical termination because of severe fetal abnormalities are all examples of perinatal loss. These tragic occurrences result in losing a baby during pregnancy or soon after delivery, upsetting families and people emotionally.

Toward healing and positivity

Perinatal loss profoundly impacts individuals and families, necessitating support and coping strategies. Connecting with professionals, joining support groups, and considering counseling can aid in healing. Exploring available resources ensures a compassionate journey toward recovery and resilience during this challenging time.