10 Easy Indicators That Will Help You Identify a Cheater
It is human nature to believe that what we have will last forever however that is not always the case.
There are times when even though everything seems picture perfect everything just falls apart without any warning. Numerous factors can cause a relationship to breakdown – lies, misunderstandings, secrets, etc.
However, what really poisons a relationship is cheating.
The reason why cheating is so fatal to a relationship is because it plays on one’s trust. Typically, the pillars that uphold a relationship are love, trust, and respect. However, the act of cheating can destroy all three in one fell swoop. Once the trust is completely gone from a relationship, it takes love and respect along with it.
Now, the question is how can one be sure about their partner not cheating on them without being completely paranoid? What are the signs your partner is going to, or already is, cheating on you?
Let’s take a look the some of the indicators that can help guide you.
1. Lack of attention
The very first red flag is probably the shift in attention. The focal point of your partner’s attention will shift from you or things related to you to themselves. Things that they previously noted or were careful of will all of a sudden not matter to them.
In some cases, they may even adopt an air of indifference. Instead, that attention will be focused more on their own self. Especially their physical appearance.
You might start to notice behaviors that you have never seen before. For example, a drastic change in fashion choice. Wearing colors and styles they previously disliked and constantly being conscious about how they look. However, if you were to ask the same questions, they would not really care.
2. Events will lose their importance
Events like birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s, etc. will lose their importance. Of course, it is very likely that this might be a mistake.
However, the difference between a genuine mistake and disinterest will be quite apparent. If your partner has made a mistake, they will be genuinely sorry and try to make it up to you.
If that isn’t the case, then you will see a careless attitude and a clear lack of concern. And this careless attitude of his is clearly one of the ten signs your partner is going to, or already is, cheating on you.
3. Absence of emotional intimacy
Another defining factor of a cheater is their lack of emotional intimacy towards their partners.
They may still indulge in sexual practices; however, you won’t feel that feeling of “romance” and “love “in your relationship.
4. Avoiding sexual intimacy
Sometimes, cheaters will also avoid sexual intimacy as well. This is another way of showing a lack of interest or simply not caring. They will try to distance themselves from the relationship. Why do they do this? It is because they probably can’t bring themselves to break up.
Therefore, distancing themselves is the next best option and a sure sign that your partner is going to, or is already cheating on you.
5. Secretive behaviour
This is another glaring red flag especially if your partner was previously very open towards you; everything from their computer to their cell phone will become off limits.
They might even get annoyed if you try to ask simple questions like “how was your day?” or “who are you going out with?
6. “Give me some space”
Yes, this is another thing you might hear.
Suddenly your partner may feel the urge to have a personal space. Not the kind of personal space that everyone needs but the kind that more or less secludes you from their life.
7. Changes in financial behaviour
You might notice that your partner has started spending more and not because they got a pay raise. No, this will be more of a general increase in expenses. It could be new clothes or self-care items or other unexplained expenses.
One thing all these expenses will have in common is that they will be focused on your partner only.
8. Your partner will be uncomfortable to have you among their friends
Most of the times, friends will know a lot more than you. Therefore, to have you in their company may be very uncomfortable for your partner. It may be possible that you may hear something that your partner is trying to hide.
Hence, they will try to separate you from their social circle.
10. Rescheduling and canceling
You partner may reschedule or cancel on you more frequently.
This will also apply to special occasions. Eventually, they will spend very little time with you, and something is bound to come up every time you decide to get together.
10. Overly defensive
Another indicator that cheaters tend to show is that when you try to talk to them about any of the things mentioned above, they will become overly defensive, hostile even.
There is also the possibility that they might turn the blame onto you. Behavior like this is usually exhibited by people who have something to hide.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.