Love is a beautiful thing, especially when you find the right person that will walk the journey of life together with you. However, it may not be easy to find the right person who will love you for who you are and not for what you have.
Otherwise, you may be in a relationship with a gold digger. Unfortunately, it can be challenging to identify a gold digger in your life. Read on to know the signs of a gold digger and ways of dealing with it.
What is a gold digger
If you are new to the dating scene, you may wonder, “What is a gold digger?”
Simply put, a gold digger is someone that gets into a relationship with another person primarily for money. They are in the relationship for money more than for love or emotional attraction. Unlike before, gold diggers can be of any gender, whether a male gold digger or a female gold digger.
If your partner lets you cater to the bills all the time, live a lavish lifestyle, dine in the most expensive places, or are always curious about your finances, chances are you are dating a gold digger.
How to spot a gold digger
There are several ways to spot a gold digger. Here is a summary of gold digger characteristics in both genders.
20 surefire signs that your partner is a gold digger
Signs of gold digger women
Spotting a gold digger earlier in the relationship can help you bail out before it’s too late. Here are ten signs of a gold digger woman you may want to watch out for.
1. She has gold digger friends
One sign that you may be dating a gold digger is if all her friends’ date and marry rich guys. Just like the saying, “Birds of the same feather flock together,” gold diggers are more likely to hang out with fellow gold diggers.
2. She is not emotionally attached
More often than not, women get emotionally attached to their partners. They love to show affection to men that they truly like.
However, this may not be the case if they are just after your money. A gold digger wife is more attached to your money, and this is her motivation to do and say the right things. But you may never hear from them as soon as the money is over.
3. Puts more value on expensive gifts
Sentimental and thoughtful gifts could mean a lot to a woman that really likes you. However, if she is only in a relationship with you because of money, she will not accept any gift that does not have a monetary value. For them, it is less about thoughtful gifts and more about expensive gifts.
4. Prefers an expensive gift for an apology
When you have a gold digger for a girlfriend, all you need is to buy them an expensive gift to resolve an argument. Instead of sitting down to solve the issue, they would rather have you buy them something of a high monetary value.
Also, some gold digger women may initiate stupid fights just so that you can buy them gifts to apologize. No matter how mad they were, getting them an expensive gift will surely impress them.
5. She only hangs out in fancy places
Most of the time, a gold digger will only want to hang out in expensive joints. Being a gold digger goes hand in hand in accepting only the finer things in life.
A gold-digging woman will choose the fanciest places usually reserved for special occasions like anniversaries or birthdays. Some will ask to go somewhere expensive on the first date just to see if you can manage their lifestyle.
6. She is curious about your income
Expect a gold digger to ask where you work, your position, where you live, and your income status out of curiosity. It is okay to know this information, especially if you intend to get serious with a gold digger in a relationship.
Unfortunately, most women inquire too much about your income to decide whether they will stay with you or not. Therefore, it may be a red flag if she questions your financial situation on the first or second date.
It is natural for men to foot the bill when on dates, particularly at the start of a relationship. Nevertheless, you should be concerned if your partner is not bothered to contribute or offer to pay the bill.
You may be having a gold digger on your hands if they are too comfortable not splitting the bill or catering to their expenses. One of gold diggers tactics is to use reverse psychology to justify their actions.
Most gold diggers will insist that a real man should cater for all bills. If you intend to take your relationship to another stage, bring up the subject and discourage the behavior as soon as possible.
8. She is ungrateful and entitled
A gold digger woman may have a sense of entitlement and don’t feel the need to work for anything. Also, they lack gratitude and may take everything for granted, and that includes you. Because of their entitled and ungrateful attitude, you will never hear words such as “Thank you” or “Please.”
On the same note, watch out for ill-mannered behaviors as they try to prove that they are financially superiors to others. For instance, they may be rude to waiters and are total snobs with people of a less social standard.
9. Always in a financial crisis
Does she keep asking for favors to solve her financial crisis? After several dates of knowing each other, if you want to know a gold digger, she will say she has a financial emergency after several dates of knowing each other.
This may become a trend and a quick way on how to spot a gold digger.
You can expect that they will be in a financial crisis now and then. Suddenly, their laptop has crashed, they need a new phone or need to repair their car. Once you notice this pattern, then you are dating a gold digger.
10. She is out of your league
The other tip on how to find a gold digger is if she is way beyond your league. Of course, love has no boundary. However, some signs may show she is beyond your league and may not be in the relationship for genuine reasons.
For instance, some younger women have different reasons for dating older men, with some claiming that they want a more mature and established man. Nevertheless, chances are they are dating an older man for money and keeping an attractive younger man that will meet their sexual and social needs.
Signs of gold digger men
Unlike popular belief, many men are gold diggers and are in relationships where they can benefit financially. As absurd as this may sound, men gold diggers will want you to cater for all the expenses and even shower him with expensive gifts. Here are the warning signs of a gold digger man.
1. He always asks about your finances
If your boyfriend always brings up topics about your finances and investments, then it is a surefire sign that he is a gold digger. Your boyfriend should enjoy spending quality time talking about your likes, qualities, and other essential things about your relationship in normal circumstances.
While it is essential to also talk about finances, it becomes a call for concern when your partner is always interested in your money because he has an ulterior motive. Therefore, you can know the motive by the things gold diggers say.
2. He always experiences financial emergencies
Like gold digger women, getting various emergencies that need money is a characteristic of a gold digger man. In most cases, such men use reverse psychology and appear manipulative when asking you for money.
A boyfriend who is a gold digger is overly concerned about other people and wants to help them but gives excuses for why they can’t find the money. Expect to be introduced to family and friends in dire need but whom you will never hear or see again.
3. He is not ambitious
Beware of a partner who has no job and is not interested in finding one soon. They have no grand plan and are rarely driven to do something constructive; instead, they just want to enjoy life.
A man who is not career-oriented will depend on you to pay for everything. Some of these male gold diggers have attractive looks, and they may leverage this to get your hard-earned money and spend it on themselves and others.
4. Lies about his job
Similarly, a gold digger guy may lie about his job and portray himself to be successful.
He may even lie about having issues at his place of work to earn your pity and get you to pay for his bills. But have you visited his business or office to know if he is genuinely working or he is just a parasite that is in a relationship with you just for money?
5. He pays for things at first and then never again
Just like any perfect gentleman, a gold digger man will take you on dates and insist on paying for everything. They tend to be charming on the first few dates until you are emotionally invested. Before you know it, they would have made a swift turn and started depending on you to pay for everything.
He will start giving excuses on why he can’t pay, like leaving his wallet in the car. To avoid embarrassment, you will take up the financial burden and slowly become accustomed to this.
6. He is always curious about your family background
Some male gold diggers ask too many questions to know about your family background. Such men will try to please you in every way, including taking you out on dates and holidays and eventually marrying you.
Unfortunately, such a man may damp you as soon as he has laid his hands on your inheritance.
7. He loves shopping and getting gifts from you
Another tip on how to catch a gold digger is by listening to what they have to say when it comes to money and investments. A man that is out for your money will always encourage you to go shopping and even volunteer to take you.
When out shopping, he will add expensive items to your shopping basket and make a 180 when you reach the counter. They will also encourage you to purchase things that will benefit them, even if it’s not your preference.
8. He becomes agitated when you say no
Beware of guys that get angry when you say no to their financial requests. This is especially true when he is used to getting money from you whenever he asks for it.
Because he already sees you as his ATM, you can expect him to get angry and throw a tantrum when you finally come to his senses and say no to his requests.
9. He likes having an extravagant lifestyle
There is no denying that everyone loves the finer things in life. However, gold diggers are less bothered about saving money and like to have an extravagant lifestyle even when cash is strapped.
Such a man will always ask for expensive things and only want to hang out at high-end establishments. He will care more about where you hang out than spend quality time with you.
10. He is very jealous
The main goal of gold diggers from both genders is to attain wealth. For this reason, gold diggers tend to get very jealous when you pursue other relationships or friendships since they consider this a threat to their objective. This is true when the other person is a man as well.
Check out this video on how to deal with a jealous partner:
Tips for dealing with gold diggers in your life
Knowing what to look for will help you know how to avoid gold diggers. If you notice any of the above signs in your partner, then it shows that you are dealing with a gold digger.
It is recommended to do further investigation to ensure that they are predators after your hard-earned money. If you are willing to continue with the relationship, take the time to bring up your concern and ask them to change their behavior.
However, some gold diggers may not be willing to change as long as the money is still coming into their accounts.
In this case, the best ways of how to get rid of a gold digger is by cutting them off entirely from your life; otherwise, they may continue using you for money. Of course, this can be extremely hard if you are already in love with them.
Recognizing a gold digger can be difficult at the start of the relationship, but once you do, it is essential to pull yourself together and take a stand. You may use these tips to ask yourself, “Are you a gold digger?” If you are, then it is high time you changed.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together.