How do you keep a long-distance relationship steamy and exciting?

If you are committed to a long-distance relationship, well, kudos to you! You definitely deserve a standing ovation.

For those who have been in a relationship with someone who is located far away knows how hard it is to keep a long-distance relationship steamy.

Aside from the regular challenges of any relationship, there is the challenge of not being together and this is very hard for any relationship.

So, just how to keep a long-distance relationship spicy? Don’t worry, we’ve got you.

Steamy LDR – Is it possible?

With a long-distance relationship, not only are you and your partner putting in that extra work every time or every day, but you are also being tested with temptation and not to mention misunderstandings. 

So, the question here is how to spice up a long-distance relationship and keep it steamy. 

The fact is, it’s hard not to be able to consummate your marriage, it’s very hard to not to be able to hug and kiss your partner and to cuddle when you have had a rough day.

Of course, sex is not the only thing that is at risk when you are in this type of relationship. Misunderstandings and drifting apart from each other is as scary as well.

All in all, being far away from your partner is hard. So, can we keep a long-distance relationship steamy?

The answer is yes! Of course, it is possible!

Couples in long-distance relationships will have challenges but it’s nothing they can’t handle. As long as you and your partner are willing to try ways on how to keep long-distance relationship steamy and strong, then this will be beneficial for you and your relationship.

In fact, it can even strengthen your bond even if you are miles apart. 

Questions to ask yourself

Why do you think, asking yourself these questions are important?

Long-distance relationship sex ideas can be hot, sometimes too hot to handle!

Without a clear understanding of how it should be done and how you will do it privately, there can be consequences that might compromise your privacy and your relationship.

Before trying any of these sex tips and ideas to keep a long-distance relationship steamy, ask yourself the following things first.

• Am I open to trying out kinky ideas for long-distance relationships?
• Is our communication strong enough that we are able to discuss fantasies and even use adult toys?
• Are we both comfortable in doing this via video chat? Via Skype and through phone calls? 
• Do we have a clear understanding of the things that we are doing and how it will affect our long-distance relationships? 

How to spice up a long-distance relationship

So, now that you are ready, let’s check out the ways on how to keep a long-distance relationship hot and steamy! 

Go for a masturbation session

Yes, that is correct. We all do it, some more often than others but most of us masturbate. It’s a natural thing so why not use it to keep a long-distance relationship steamy?

Talk with your partner and once you feel the fire burning, once you feel turned on, continue until you are doing phone sex. It’s actually a fun way to keep connected with your partner, even if he or she is far away.

Use words, moan, be descriptive, and most of all, enjoy what you are doing and it will be so good.

Steamy emails or texts

Sex through the phone isn’t the only thing that you can do with your partner.

Keep a long-distance relationship steamy by keeping constant communication with your partner. Aside from the usual greetings and asking about day to day experiences, why not try to send sweet and sexy texts or messages? 

Write your own sex stories

Love writing? Do you have a fantasy and you want to tell it your partner?

Well, use your imagination and create your own steamy sex stories. In fact, you can even use your own names and it will be so fun to keep a long-distance relationship steamy.

Top it up a notch and do it per chapter. Send it every day so that your partner will look forward to seeing something every single day. Plus, once you see each other, you can make this story come true. 

Tease your partner  

One of the best things to keep a long-distance relationship steamy is to tease your partner. Nothing beats teasing when it comes to sexual intimacy.

It drives our hormones crazy and makes everything alive and exciting!

Wear sexy lingerie and send it to your man. Wear a sexy boxer and create a short clip of you dancing for your woman – now that’s teasing. 

Leave a surprise

If you are able to visit each other, make sure to leave sunrises for your partner. If we can suggest, you can leave sexy lingerie under his bed or pillow.

Don’t forget to spray your favorite perfume on it so that he’ll think of you as soon as he sees it. We’re sure that he’d want to see you as soon as possible after this.

Use teledildonic toys

Are you familiar with sex toys? How about teledildonic toys? Did you know that this is one sure way to keep a long-distance relationship steamy?

We are so lucky to have this technology today. Now, you don’t have to be in the same house or room to have sex and to sexually stimulate each other. It’s now possible using teledildonic toys, with the use of technology, your partner or you can control the adult toy via an app.

Now, your partner can stimulate you even if you are miles away from each other. This is such a great present for your partner that both of you can enjoy!

So, is it really hard to keep a long-distance relationship steamy? It depends on the couple. If you and your partner both have an opened mind, then trying these tips would be easy for you.

If you are both willing to try different things then you will never have a boring relationship and you will always look forward to seeing and talking with your partner. 

Watch this video:

Continue exploring this topic

Talk to our Marriage.com AI Relationship Coach

Chat with me, ask questions and get help

Start Chatting

Marriage.com AI: Your Relationship Guide

Talk through what's on your mind.

Automated

Hi, I'm your relationship guide. What's on your mind?

YOU COULD START WITH

How to keep a long-distance relationship exciting?

How to maintain steaminess in a long-distance relationship?

AI guidance only - not therapy. In crisis? Call a helpline or Find a Therapist

Terms

Rachael Pace Author

Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships... Read more and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together. Read less

Marriage.com Assessment

What Help Does Your Relationship Need Most Right Now Quiz

Reviewed byJennifer Schulz, LCSW

Backed by relationship science and evidence-based psychology, this assessment helps identify the area of your relationship that deserves the most attention right now, whether things feel strong or slightly off. Research shows that even healthy relat...

Questions: 20 | Last updated: Jan 23, 2026

Sample Question

When you and your partner talk about something important…

We listen with care — even hard talks feel safe and productive

We try to talk, but lately emotional closeness feels harder to reach

I want to be open, but part of me still guards my heart

Our discussions sometimes spiral or end unresolved

It’s hard to feel close because our physical intimacy hasn’t felt strong lately

We often see things differently about goals or priorities

Take the Quiz Now