If you are in a long-term relationship and plan to get married soon, you probably wonder what married life is going to be like. While there will be many people handing out premarital tips to you for free, including your family, friends and even spouse-to-be, there is no need to heed every piece of advice that comes your way. Even as you are busy with the wedding preparations, keeping certain pre marriage tips in mind can actually help you ease into this new phase in your life.
Simple things like developing a deeper understanding about your partner, fighting fairly, identifying the red flags and managing the expectations can go a long way in making your marriage a healthy one.
Here are five premarital tips to guide you towards a happy and satisfying married life.
1. Get to know each other well
While it’s okay to listen to everyone and then do what your heart wants, considering premarital tips that include knowing your partner well shouldn’t be ignored.
When you are dating someone, you are usually both on your “best behaviour” and it is easy to think your partner is perfect in every way. But the reality is that we all have our flaws and weaknesses.
It is best if you can find these things out about each other before getting married. If you and your partner are both honest about areas in which you struggle, this can be a good recipe for a healthy marriage in which spouses complement and support each other. If you think that it isn’t easy to open up about your fears with your partner and it will become difficult after marriage then going for pre marriage counseling isn’t a bad idea.
2. Learn to fight properly
Ask any married couple and you’ll surely get this as a premarital advice.
In fact, when your close ones are handing out premarital tips related to fights in a marriage, don’t go on the defensive saying that you will never have them with your partner.
When two unique and separate individuals get married, certain differences are inevitable and sooner or later there will be some significant disagreement between the two of you. How you handle conflicts will be crucial to the success or failure of your marriage and conflict resolution is an important part of your pre-marriage preparation.
It is a skill to be learnt, with determination, practice and much patience, to talk through thorny issues, to reach a decision or compromise, and to forgive and move on. Conflicts which are not dealt with properly linger and smolder, becoming highly toxic to your marriage.
3. Talk about expectations for having children
One of the premarital counselling tips to remember is to talk about your expectations for having children before getting married. Perhaps you have always longed to have several children, but your future spouse is determined to have only one, or even none.
This is a pre-marital issue which needs to be addressed and dealt with appropriately. The different pre marriage questions that you can ask when it comes to children can be about when to have children, how many to have and about basic parenting values and styles.
4. Don’t ignore warning bells
If you hear any warning bells tinkling softly at the back of your mind, don’t ignore or push them aside, hoping that somehow it will all work out. It is better to investigate any pre-marital issues and see whether it is indeed something to be concerned about or not.
Problems only disappear when they are faced head on and sometimes getting pre marriage advice from a matured person in your life or pre-marital relationship advice from a qualified counselor can be helpful. While you are in the throes of love, it doesn’t hurt to consider these useful premarital tips while getting ready for marriage so that you don’t end up being in a bad place later on.
5. Choose who you will listen to
When family, friends and acquaintances hear that you are thinking of getting married, you may find that suddenly anyone and everyone has all kinds of marriage advice and premarital advice for you! This can be quite overwhelming, especially from those who try to “scare” you with all the bad experiences they have had in the guise of giving premarital tips.
It is important that you choose carefully who you listen to and who you will allow to be an influence in your life and in your marriage. In fact, this can be one of the things to discuss before marriage so that you and your partner remain on the same page.
For some it can be their parents or a close relative that they look upto. Whatever be the case, respect your partner’s wishes when they go about seeking pre marriage counseling tips or advice on important things post marriage from this person. That is, as long as that person does not pose a threat to your relationship.
So now that you know the best premarital tips that can be followed for a happy married life, get going with the preparations for one of the best days of your life. For more premarital counseling tips or pre marriage questions, keep reading marriage.com for expert advice.